The Hay Diaries
14 Dec, 15 > 20 Dec, 15
7 Dec, 15 > 13 Dec, 15
17 Sep, 12 > 23 Sep, 12
10 Sep, 12 > 16 Sep, 12
14 Jun, 10 > 20 Jun, 10
31 May, 10 > 6 Jun, 10
15 Mar, 10 > 21 Mar, 10
1 Feb, 10 > 7 Feb, 10
25 Jan, 10 > 31 Jan, 10
18 Jan, 10 > 24 Jan, 10
11 Jan, 10 > 17 Jan, 10
25 May, 09 > 31 May, 09
4 May, 09 > 10 May, 09
20 Apr, 09 > 26 Apr, 09
13 Apr, 09 > 19 Apr, 09
6 Apr, 09 > 12 Apr, 09
30 Mar, 09 > 5 Apr, 09
23 Mar, 09 > 29 Mar, 09
16 Mar, 09 > 22 Mar, 09
9 Mar, 09 > 15 Mar, 09
2 Mar, 09 > 8 Mar, 09
5 Jan, 09 > 11 Jan, 09
29 Dec, 08 > 4 Jan, 09
1 Dec, 08 > 7 Dec, 08
7 Jul, 08 > 13 Jul, 08
23 Jun, 08 > 29 Jun, 08
9 Jun, 08 > 15 Jun, 08
19 May, 08 > 25 May, 08
12 May, 08 > 18 May, 08
5 May, 08 > 11 May, 08
24 Mar, 08 > 30 Mar, 08
17 Mar, 08 > 23 Mar, 08
10 Mar, 08 > 16 Mar, 08
3 Mar, 08 > 9 Mar, 08
25 Feb, 08 > 2 Mar, 08
18 Feb, 08 > 24 Feb, 08
11 Feb, 08 > 17 Feb, 08
4 Feb, 08 > 10 Feb, 08
28 Jan, 08 > 3 Feb, 08
21 Jan, 08 > 27 Jan, 08
14 Jan, 08 > 20 Jan, 08
17 Dec, 07 > 23 Dec, 07
10 Dec, 07 > 16 Dec, 07
12 Nov, 07 > 18 Nov, 07
5 Nov, 07 > 11 Nov, 07
22 Oct, 07 > 28 Oct, 07
1 Oct, 07 > 7 Oct, 07
27 Aug, 07 > 2 Sep, 07
20 Aug, 07 > 26 Aug, 07
13 Aug, 07 > 19 Aug, 07
6 Aug, 07 > 12 Aug, 07
30 Jul, 07 > 5 Aug, 07
23 Jul, 07 > 29 Jul, 07
9 Jul, 07 > 15 Jul, 07
18 Jun, 07 > 24 Jun, 07
11 Jun, 07 > 17 Jun, 07
28 May, 07 > 3 Jun, 07
21 May, 07 > 27 May, 07
14 May, 07 > 20 May, 07
7 May, 07 > 13 May, 07
30 Apr, 07 > 6 May, 07
16 Apr, 07 > 22 Apr, 07
2 Apr, 07 > 8 Apr, 07
26 Mar, 07 > 1 Apr, 07
19 Mar, 07 > 25 Mar, 07
12 Mar, 07 > 18 Mar, 07
5 Mar, 07 > 11 Mar, 07
26 Feb, 07 > 4 Mar, 07
19 Feb, 07 > 25 Feb, 07
12 Feb, 07 > 18 Feb, 07
15 Jan, 07 > 21 Jan, 07
1 Jan, 07 > 7 Jan, 07
25 Dec, 06 > 31 Dec, 06
18 Dec, 06 > 24 Dec, 06
11 Dec, 06 > 17 Dec, 06
4 Dec, 06 > 10 Dec, 06
20 Nov, 06 > 26 Nov, 06
30 Oct, 06 > 5 Nov, 06
25 Sep, 06 > 1 Oct, 06
18 Sep, 06 > 24 Sep, 06
4 Sep, 06 > 10 Sep, 06
28 Aug, 06 > 3 Sep, 06
21 Aug, 06 > 27 Aug, 06
14 Aug, 06 > 20 Aug, 06
7 Aug, 06 > 13 Aug, 06
31 Jul, 06 > 6 Aug, 06
10 Jul, 06 > 16 Jul, 06
3 Jul, 06 > 9 Jul, 06
26 Jun, 06 > 2 Jul, 06
19 Jun, 06 > 25 Jun, 06
12 Jun, 06 > 18 Jun, 06
5 Jun, 06 > 11 Jun, 06
29 May, 06 > 4 Jun, 06
22 May, 06 > 28 May, 06
15 May, 06 > 21 May, 06
8 May, 06 > 14 May, 06
1 May, 06 > 7 May, 06
24 Apr, 06 > 30 Apr, 06
17 Apr, 06 > 23 Apr, 06
10 Apr, 06 > 16 Apr, 06
6 Mar, 06 > 12 Mar, 06
27 Feb, 06 > 5 Mar, 06
20 Feb, 06 > 26 Feb, 06
13 Feb, 06 > 19 Feb, 06
6 Feb, 06 > 12 Feb, 06
23 Jan, 06 > 29 Jan, 06
9 Jan, 06 > 15 Jan, 06
2 Jan, 06 > 8 Jan, 06
26 Dec, 05 > 1 Jan, 06
12 Dec, 05 > 18 Dec, 05
5 Dec, 05 > 11 Dec, 05
28 Nov, 05 > 4 Dec, 05
14 Nov, 05 > 20 Nov, 05
7 Nov, 05 > 13 Nov, 05
31 Oct, 05 > 6 Nov, 05
24 Oct, 05 > 30 Oct, 05
17 Oct, 05 > 23 Oct, 05
10 Oct, 05 > 16 Oct, 05
3 Oct, 05 > 9 Oct, 05
27 Jun, 05 > 3 Jul, 05
20 Jun, 05 > 26 Jun, 05
13 Jun, 05 > 19 Jun, 05
6 Jun, 05 > 12 Jun, 05
23 May, 05 > 29 May, 05
16 May, 05 > 22 May, 05
11 Apr, 05 > 17 Apr, 05
4 Apr, 05 > 10 Apr, 05
28 Mar, 05 > 3 Apr, 05
21 Mar, 05 > 27 Mar, 05
14 Mar, 05 > 20 Mar, 05
21 Feb, 05 > 27 Feb, 05
14 Feb, 05 > 20 Feb, 05
7 Feb, 05 > 13 Feb, 05
24 Jan, 05 > 30 Jan, 05
17 Jan, 05 > 23 Jan, 05
10 Jan, 05 > 16 Jan, 05
29 Nov, 04 > 5 Dec, 04
22 Nov, 04 > 28 Nov, 04
15 Nov, 04 > 21 Nov, 04
11 Oct, 04 > 17 Oct, 04
20 Sep, 04 > 26 Sep, 04
13 Sep, 04 > 19 Sep, 04
30 Aug, 04 > 5 Sep, 04
23 Aug, 04 > 29 Aug, 04
16 Aug, 04 > 22 Aug, 04
9 Aug, 04 > 15 Aug, 04
2 Aug, 04 > 8 Aug, 04
26 Jul, 04 > 1 Aug, 04
19 Jul, 04 > 25 Jul, 04
5 Jul, 04 > 11 Jul, 04
28 Jun, 04 > 4 Jul, 04
21 Jun, 04 > 27 Jun, 04
14 Jun, 04 > 20 Jun, 04
7 Jun, 04 > 13 Jun, 04
31 May, 04 > 6 Jun, 04
24 May, 04 > 30 May, 04
17 May, 04 > 23 May, 04
10 May, 04 > 16 May, 04
3 May, 04 > 9 May, 04
26 Apr, 04 > 2 May, 04
19 Apr, 04 > 25 Apr, 04
12 Apr, 04 > 18 Apr, 04
29 Mar, 04 > 4 Apr, 04
22 Mar, 04 > 28 Mar, 04
15 Mar, 04 > 21 Mar, 04
8 Mar, 04 > 14 Mar, 04
1 Mar, 04 > 7 Mar, 04
23 Feb, 04 > 29 Feb, 04
16 Feb, 04 > 22 Feb, 04
9 Feb, 04 > 15 Feb, 04
2 Feb, 04 > 8 Feb, 04
26 Jan, 04 > 1 Feb, 04
19 Jan, 04 > 25 Jan, 04
12 Jan, 04 > 18 Jan, 04
5 Jan, 04 > 11 Jan, 04
29 Dec, 03 > 4 Jan, 04
You are not logged in. Log in
Entries by Topic
All topics
Da Lore
Lagomorphin Enterprises
Libbin Assa Urban Rabbit
Me 'n' Mouse
Movin' On!  «
Our Warren, 2006
The Next Generation
The Third Gennyrayshun
Blog Tools
Edit your Blog
Build a Blog
View Profile
Thursday, 10 December 2015
Mood:  incredulous
Topic: Movin' On!

Maman wants me to come read something called "The Noos" with her. Seems that George did it, and he made comments and stuff and now she wants me to do it, too. 

Thing is, her Study is upstairs. She offered to pick me up. Literally, Pick. Me. Up. As in "up in the air". Um, NO! So she had the idea of stuffing me in a carrier, but I'm too heavy for her in a carrier. Besides, I smell Catz up there. She says she has a Door, but I am NOT going anywhere I don't want to go and that means where there might be Catz. Heck, I'm not even ready to come out of the BunRoom and Maman wants me to go upstairs to her Study?

What is she, nuts? Why doesn't she take Franzi or Foxie? Why ME? Okay, Franzi probably doesn't have any opinions about this "Noos" stuff, and Foxie is just going to Disapprove. She wants to ride around inside Dada's sweater, not go on some Expedition with Maman.

Don't get me wrong - this is a nice bunny-home! There are salads, fresh hay, your own litter-box, food and water crocks and very own room. But the humans are crazy! Maman sits in the BunRoom and tells stories about bunnies who have lived here. She has momentos on the walls that she takes down and shows us. She says she wants us to learn The Lore. Well, yeah, that's nice, but I'm still exploring! I'm busy!

Oh, and she butt-plucks. Yeah. If she sees any loose fur you're shedding, she gets out this comb. She doesn't hold you or anything; she's more of a drive-by comber. You cruise past and she combs your butt. Then she lures you in with head pets. See how that works? Pet the head, comb the butt. Oh, and if you let her get away with this, she gives you a raisin. I'm torn between wanting the pets and raisins and NOT having my butt combed! Foxie says its my fault for shedding. She can say that because she's done shedding. Franzi says the key is to stay tidy. Easy to say when your butt isn't a long way away from your head!

This whole "house-bunny" thing is perplexing. Every house seems to be different, but one thing is the same: all the humans are nuts!  

Posted by Our Warren at 9:39 AM EST
Post Comment | Permalink
Wednesday, 9 December 2015
Mood:  cheeky
Topic: Movin' On!

Well, I have my own habitat. It's roomy. In fact, I have access to the whole BunRoom. I'm not sure I like the whole BunRoom. It's too big. I like having my own habitat, my own litterbox, my own food-dish and water-crock - but I am not positive about this whole BunRoom thing.

Mostly, I go sit under Franzi. I don't look at him, mind you, I just sit under his habitat. Maman is talking about something called "bonding" me to that flop-earred nut-bag. I don't know what she means. I've never been "bonded" and I'm not sure I want to be. I mean, he's a BOY! I don't want to be "bonded" to Foxie, either because she's tiny and a totally Disapproving Rabbit. Besides, she likes Dada better than anybun!

Frankly, I want MORE salads! Pellets are nice, and so is hay, but one salad, even a big one, just isn't cutting it. Maman tried giving me part of something she called a "grape". Epic fail! And one raisin as a treat in the middle of the day? Epic Fail! I'm 12 lbs.! I should get more. Like a handfull, every time!

Dada got the rubbish out, just in time. This place NEEDS a Managing Rabbit. That would be me. I'm just the size to do it! Franzi is too mild and Foxie just disapproves. And I THINK I can smell Catz somewhere. More than one. They will have to be Impressed Upon! This is a Warren, not a Chowder, and the Head of a Warren is a BUNNY! One smells like an Old Cat, tho, so I will be kind to him even tho I haven't seen him... yet.

But to visit Catz means I have to leave this BunRoom and I'm not ready to do that. For right now, I'll go sit under Franzi's habitat and bother him. Bawhahahahahaha! 

Posted by Our Warren at 1:20 PM EST
Post Comment | Permalink
Thursday, 16 June 2005
Mood:  energetic
Now Playing: Foolin' Natchur
Topic: Movin' On!
Maman waked up dis mornin' aboud five-AM, comed out innu da Bun Room an' told me dat dis was wunna dose mornin's when she felt wike she wished her hed wuld fall off an roll unnerneaf obba sofa where we wuld hab to go pokin' around, wookin' for it wif sticks.

An' I wooked at Missy an' sed,


An' it was all cloudy out, wiffoud sunshine for once, which issa good fing, cos it has bin rilly HOT heer.

Not *heer* inna Bun Room, cos we hab sumfing called "central air" which seems to be datta heat-vent blows cold air for me an' Missy to sit-upon.

But when Maman opins da Back Door to wet outta Dawg...

Lemme tell you, whut comes in fru dat door is wike whut comes outta dat udder white box inna kitchin where Maman puts Dadda's dinner - da Obin.

An whenna Dawg comes inna'gin, he says dat it is HOT out dere an' dat da onliest fing you can do is to sit inna grass unner a tree an' keepa Eye Out Fur Squirrells. Cos ennyfing else is just more den wun Dawg can cope wif.

Maman sed we can't go out onna Screen-Porch onna'count ob it bein' too hot out dere, too, an' so we are stayin' inna Bun Room, sittin' ober dat "Cental Air" fing, singin' songs an' habbin' hay. Cos dat's whut bunnies do when dere is too much sun - just take it easy.

But not Maman or Dadda. Nope. Hoomins are stoopit wike dis. Dey go out inna sun, or else dey keep doin' fings wike it is not hot out.

But ebbin' if it is not hot inna houz, your insides know dat it is hot outside. Dey know dat whut is inside is not rite compared to whut is outside an' dat sumfing is wrong wiffa entyre pikchur ob Whut Rilly Is Goin' On.


Cos your insides know dat dere is too much sun outside, an' dat it is too hot to be doin' so menny fings, but dat you are inna (big werds comin' up heer) "arty-fish-ul en-vy-ron-mint" dat is not reel.

Dat's whut "arty-fish-ul" means: NOT REEL. Fake.

An' "en-vy-ron-mint" means: whut's around you, whut you are libbin' in.

So, basikly, it means dat you are libbin' in whut's not reel, an' you insides know dat dey are bein' fooled an' dey don't wike it.

An' so, your insides are wettin' you know dat dey know dat you are tryin' to PRE-TEND fings aren't as dey rilly are!


An', you know, you shuld not try to fool your insides innu finkin' dey are sumwhere's dey are not, cos dey still know dat outside dis cool, nice, arty-fish-ul en-vy-ron-mint inside obba houz, it is still majorly HOT outside obba houz inn reel werld.

Bunnies know dis wiffoud bein' told, cos we listen to our insides.

It's wike dis:

How do you fink datta bunny inna burrow knows da wedder outside obba burrow? How do you fink we know how deep to dig da burrow, or where to dig it, or how to place it so it will be outta da wind an' rain?

Our insides knows.

An' we listen to our insides.

Dis is why, ebben wiffa "Central Air" coolin' our butts, we still lie aroun inna Bun Room an' act wike we is outside inna burrow, an' sing songs all day an' eat hay - cos our insides aren't fooled by da "Central Air" blowin' up our fur.

We know dat da "Central Air" issa fake air, anna "Arty-fish-ul En-vy-ron-mint".

Da reel deal is out dere where da Dawg is, onna grass, unner'neaf obba trees. An' just wike da Dawg says (which we alreddy know) it is HOT out dere!

An' we're smawt enuf to sit still, cos we listen to our insides.

But Maman an' Dadda go on wike da outside don't happin - which is why whin Maman gotted up dis mornin', her hed felt wike a punkin', an' her joints won't werk, an' she can't find enny balance, an' she's needin alla da coffee-inna-pot just to stay upright on her feets.

Cos listenin' is notta hoomin fing.

Yeah. I hab noticed dis bifore: hoomins do not listen to much besides whut dey wanna heer.

An' I fink I know why...

It's cos dey gots small ears.

Yup. Small ears, close to dere heds, dat don't moob well.

It's gennyetricks. Or sumfing. But dat's whut's happined to dem - dey hab small ears, so dey can't listin to whut's goin' on alla round, unless it's comin' frum inside ob dere heds.

It's worse den dags or catz, I'm tellin' you.

Hoomins are EAR-er-ly challenged (which means dat dey can't help it).

All I can say, issat it issa good fing dat Maman an' Dadda hab Companion Bunnies!

------- by George

Posted by Our Warren at 8:19 AM EDT
Updated: Thursday, 16 June 2005 8:36 AM EDT
Post Comment | Permalink
Thursday, 17 March 2005
New Apawtmints
Mood:  cool
Now Playing: Here Comes the Sun
Topic: Movin' On!

Well, you wouldn't believe it.

We have new homes.

We are moving UP inna werld.

Now, Belinda Bunny told me that when you are "wun foot offa ground, you gots no pwace to go but up". So I guess she also told this to Maman an' Dadda, and these new habbytats are their idea ob movin' UP.

Cos we are def-in-et-ly now onna UP side ob fings.

I mean, I am now on nose-level wiffa Collie-dawg.

Yup. He and I now see eye-to-eye, ebbery morning.

It's like this:

We inna Warren wake up when it is still offishully Dark. That's when rabbits wake up to start the day - at the tail-end of Dark, just before Light.

We wake up the Sun.

It's an impawtant job, cos without us, the Sun wouldn't know it was time to rise and shine.

So all ober da werld, bunnies wake up and stawt habbin their breakfasts inna Dark. And as we're habbin our breakfasts, da Sun hears us munchin' and makin' all kinds ob noise, an wakes up and begins risin' which means that the stars begin to go to bed - one by one. If you look outta window, you can see the stars fadin out as they leave the sky an' cuddle unnerneaf ob their cloud-blankies to go to sleep - an then, as the stars leave, well, Here Comes The Sun.

So the stars go to sleep, an the sun is rising, an the bunnies are munchin and makin' noises, habbin' breakfast.

Now for us housebunnies, breakfast is mostly hay and sum pellets an wadder frum Our Crocks.

Now some bunnies are Sippers, like Beebe. They take liddle drinks ob wadder and then wander off, but some bunnies are like my MissyBun and they are Tankers. They only drink once or twice a day, but when they drink, lemme tell you, they drink! They get nose-down inna crock an' don't come up forebber, an alla time, their tummies is gurglin' and squeekin' an ebben poppin' almost - as they fill up wif wadder. You nebber heared nuffin' wike it!

Belinda could make more noise drinkin wadder on her own den almost ennybunny I knowed - cept Missy. An Missy issa champion noise-maker when it comes to drinkin' wadder. She slurps, she squeeks, she burbles, she pops, she laps; she makes all kinds ob noises - an just so dat she can wake uppa Sun. It's her job an' she does it well.

But Missy's tummy also wakes uppa Dawg.

That's the Thing aboudda dawg - he hears ebberyfing. It's like his ears have scoops on'em, so he can scoop up alla sounds inna house at nite.

So he hears MissyBun drinking, tanking up on wadder, an out he comes frumma bedroom where Maman an Dadda are sleepin' to see whut alla noise is aboud.

And the noise is Missy, drinkin'.

So the Sun is wakin up an spreadin out all ober da sky like melted budder, an heer comes da dawg to see whut's up wif Missy's tummy.

But he hardly geds innu the kitchin, before he realises dat he's hearin wadder - and you know whut that does to a dawg who has been asleep alla nite long... makes him bemember that he hasn't gone toda bafroom inna wong, wong time.

Now for sum reazon, dawgs don't hab pooty-boxes. Cats do, an bunnies do, but not dawgs. Dawgs hab "yards" outside obba back-door that they "patrol" and that's where they habba pooty-place. I know this cossa Dawg told me.

So the Dawg comes innu the kitchin an looks at us, an he hears Missy gurgling, an bemembers that he hasta go "Outside".

Well, there's a babygate, an he's not 'lowed ober it wiffout Maman or Dadda. Besides, he don't hab 'posable thumbs to opin the door. So he's stuck.

Now before, when we were only wun foot offa ground, he didn't pay us much 'tenshun. Now dat we are inna new apawtmints, and are on eye-level wif him, it's like he's made a discobbery an we're it.

"Bunnies, I needa go outside."

And him an' me wook at each udder, an I wook atta udder bunnies an shurg, because we don't have 'posable thumbs eidder, and that door is locked up tighter than a cat's butt.

So I tell da dawg, "Lookit, Dawg, you gotta go getta hoomin."

And Mouse *thumps* because that's his way of callin' to Maman.

But a Maman asleep issa Maman who is gonna stay dat way. Dere is no use in callin Maman when she's sleepin', cos she goes deaf when she's asleep.

Then sumfing goes "click" onna counter inna kitchin an it starts to rain coffee inna pot onna counter.

Anna Dawg wooks atta pot wiffa coffee raining down innit an wags his tail a widdle in a berry werried way. Cos now he's not only hearing Missy wiffa wadder, he's hearin' rain inna coffee-pot.

"Dadda's gonna come?" He axts hopefully.

So I shake my head an flap my ears around, an Missy goes on drinkin', wif her tummy making more squeeks an' bubbles.

Anna Dawg opins his mouf an grins an stawts to pant a widdle.

"I godda go out soon."

An' I'm finkin', Oh geez, he's gonna stawt dat high-pitched peepin' dat collies do. So I sed to him, "Don't wook at me. I can't help you, Dawg."

Anna Dawg stawts whinin', "I gotta see if my yard is okay. See iffa squirrels is innit, an if dere wassa'nudder dawg innit, an if my pooty-spot is still mine, an iffa fence is all okay, an..."

"So why don't you go get Dadda?" asks Mouse and he *thumps* again, cos he can't stand the whinin' enny more than I can.

An Missy's still tankin up on wadder...lap, lap, lap, bubble, bubble, squeek, squeek...

Anna Dawg is beginning to wook a widdle desprit.

"Can your missus, um, stop, um, wiffa wadder?" The Dawg axts me.

An I'm wike, "Er, no. She's tankin up forda day an wakin uppa sun."

Anna Dawg is crossin' his paws now an wavin' his tail all around, an' then he trots off, fru da dining room, an downnahall.

An I can hear him go innu da bedroom where Maman an Dadda are sleepin.

Den I hear Dadda.

Den I hear da Dawg sneeze.

Den I hear Dadda again, an he's not happy.

"For hebbin's sake, Dawg!"

And den out dey bof come downnahall, fru the dining room, fru da kitchin, an Dadda opins da baby-gate anna dawg comes dancin' through.

Then Dadda pushes da button that makes The Box say things (like, "The Alarm Is Off", aldoh it has sed udder fings, like "Doors and Windows On" and onct it sed, "Unauthorized Entry" when Dadda fortygot to push sum buttons an Maman started yellin' an Dadda was runnin' around, wooking for his keys an stuff. It was preddy funny. Dat box is sumfing, lemme tell you.).

And den Dadda opined da door anna Dawg shot outside wike his tail was on fire.

An Dadda watched him for a minit an den wooked at me an sed, "Buggerit." Which issa werd he learned frum Hunny. I don't know whut it means, but Hunny sed it a lot.

An Dadda pushed Our Curtains aside frum Our Window, and there wassa Sun, just peekin' fru the trees.

An I nudged Missy an she wooked up, too, wiffa drop ob wadder on her cute widdle nose.

"Did I do it?" She axt me.

And I sed she had.

An' she sed, "Good. 'Bout time the Sun waked up. Cos I'm almost oberflowin wif wadder."

Which issa troof, cos when she walked, she waddled, wif her tummy swingin' back and forf. But dat's the fing aboud Missy - she sure knows how to wake uppa Sun.

----- By George

Posted by Our Warren at 10:10 AM EST
Sunday, 20 February 2005
Biological Diversity
Mood:  not sure
Now Playing: Insecurity Rains!
Topic: Movin' On!

Wow. Hoomins only hab two hands. Dey are rilly challenged when it comes down to bein' annymuls.

It's too bad that they don't hab enuf 'pendanges, you know? Cos it seems like dey gots too much to do, an don't hab da 'quipmint to do it wif.

Wike dis mornin'.

Ebberyfing was preddy quiet, an I was habbin sum hay, wike Hunny teached...taught me, anna Fat Cat, whose name is Cokie, comed...came out toda gate inna Bun Room an axted:

"Why you bunnies gots fud alla time an I don't?"

So I telled...told him, "Wookit, Cokes, if you didn't eat alla your stuff anna dawg's stuff anna udder cat's stuff, too, dere wuld still be sum stuff weft in your bowl. Want sum hay?"

And he said, "I'm gonna go wake uppa Dadda an ged sum fud, budda Dawg's inna doorway an I can't get fru wiffout him jumpin up and geddin in my face an tryin to 'herd' me away frumma bed. It's MY bed an dat's MYDadda, too! I don't wike it heer! Dis noo house stinks."

And I said toda Cokie-cat: "Wookit, you godda share. It whut we do. It's bein pawt obba Warren."

Anna Cokie sat down an sed, "Cats don't gots Warrens, Rabbit. You is pawt ob My Chowder. We gots Chowders anna females, wike KayCee are in charge. Now KayCee knew howta runna Chowder, lemme tell you! But Phil-da-Lad taked her wif him an weft me wif da Stoopit Cat who don't know how to run nuffin, who issa 'fraid obba Dawg - KayCee was nebber afraid, cept forda wun time when she was wike, velcroed toda dawg's face an he couldn't see an dey bof ran into da wall, wif ebberyone screamin', incloodin Maman - but KayCee nebber letta fud bowls ged empty. She knowed howta get things dun. Da Stoopit Cat dat libs heer don't know datta Dawg issa herder an don't bite. You jus walks unner neaf ob him when he's tryin to herd you an he geds his hed tangled up in his legs tryin to follow you an falls ober. It issn't hard to mess wif dis Dawg's hed."

An I sed, "So, wike, whut's da pwoblem?"

An Cokie stawted to gwoom himself, which is sad, cos I don't hab to gwoom myself. I gwoom Missy and she gwooms me. I fink cats hab it hard cos dey do alla dere gwooming OnAlone.

An between licks, Cokie sed, "I don' wanna share. Cats don' share. We hab stuff. My chair inna sitting room, My bowl. My bed. My Dadda! Me, my, MINE."

So I wooked at Missy an Missy wooked at me an I knowed...knew 'zacktly whut she was finking, namely, dat to be pawt obba Warren, you hab to do fings Alla Us Togedder.

An I also know dat when Cokie wailed, "MINE" wike dat, datta Dawg was gonna heer it, an he did, an preddy soon, oud he comes, wif his toenails goin tappy-tap onna floor obba kitchin.

Anna Dawg is wike, "So whuttsup wif you, Cat?"

An Cokie glares atta Dawg an says, "Go wook inna bowl."

So da Dawg goes to wook inna bowls dat is lined up by da Welsh Dresser, and Cokie whispurrs to me,

"Dat Dawg is so stoopit, too. Does ennyfing you tell him. I don' ged it! Hassn't he gots enny Pride at all?"

Anna Dawg ambles back an yawns an says, "Dey is all empty wif nuffin in'em. So wassamatter? Fud will come when Dadda wakes up. Hope it's soon. I godda go, you know, OutSide, an check my yard."

Anna Cokie Cat grumbles, "Oh yeah, your yard. How could I have forgotten it's your yard an I'm not 'lowed out dere?"

An I sed, "Wookit, Cokie, I'm not 'lowed out inna yard eidder an I don wanna go. I gotta habbytat an dat's whut's rite forda Warren. So da Dawg has gotta yard. You gotta red chair inna sittin' room."

"Only when Dadda's not innit," Sed Cokie. "Cos when he's innit, he wants me outta it. Says I'm too big an datta Dawg wants pets too an dat he don't hab enuf hands an dat we is all 'insekure'."

An I sed, "I'm not insekure. I'm preddy sekure rite where I am. You ged usta fings when dey are around for a widdle while."

Anna Cokie-cat wooked at me an at Beebe in da udder habbytat an Beebe-Bunny sed, "Yo!" which is his normal comment on most fings.

Den Cokie shook his hed, an sed, "Wookit, Dawg, dere is no fud. You gets to go outside inna yard. You ged alla pets an fusses -"

"Do not." Sedda Dawg. "Maman is allus tellin' me, 'Marc, Down.' which is a Command, and I hafta Obey Commands. I lernt dat in Beedy'ence Skool. When I Obey Commands, I am part obba Pack. Not Obeying Commands puts me outside obba Pack and that is not good."

So I axted da Dawg, "Whutssa 'Pack" fing?"

Anna Dawg sed, "Like a Warren, but for dawgs, an it has dif'frunt Roolz."

Anna Cokie-cat sneezed, cossa Dawg is sheddin fluff.

And den Cokie sed, "Well, I ain't in no 'Pack'."

Anna Dawg sed, "Ebberyone heer is inna Pack. Dat's whut dis is - da Pack. Dadda issa Alpha Male, Maman issa Alpha Female. I'm Sekond Male, an you are down dere wiffa rest ob my 'sponsibilities."

Anna Cokie-Fat-Cat sed, "I ain't pawt obba Pack, you Stoopit Dawg! You are a pawt ob My Chowder,"

So I inner'rupted him an sed, "I thought we wassa One Big Warren, Alla Us Togedder."

An we all wooked at each udder.

Anna Dawg wet outta small "peep" ob anxiety an sort ob collapsed onna floor.

"I dunno whut we are, but I know I gotta go OutSide rilly soon!" He whined.

"Why can't you use a litter-box like da west ob us?" axted Cokie, gettin' up.

"Cos I amma Dawg. Hey, Cat, where you goin'?"

Cos Cokie was on his feets and thuddin outta da kitchin on his way toda dinin' room where I couldn't see him, but I could heer him anna Dawg still arguin':

Cokie: Gonna wake up Dadda. Get off my tail, you stoopit dawg!

Dawg: You can't wake uppa Dadda! It's not rite to disturb da Alpha Male! It's against da Roolz!

Cokie: An wike I told you bifore where you can stick your Roolz. (Nuffin is as sarcastik assa Cat, lemme tell you!)

Dawg: Bud you hafta Obey Commands.

Cokie: Put your "Commands" rite back there along wif your "Roolz". I amma Cat. Inna Chowder, only da Alpha Female an that would beKayCee who isn't heer can tell me whut to do.

Dawg: The Alpha Female is Maman!

By now, da Dawg was barkin, anna Cokie-Cat musta jumped onna bed cos I herd Dadda yellin, "Will you two buggers pack it in?" an he was angry.

An sure enuf, preddy soon, here comed..came da Dawg, anna Cokie-Cat, followed by a rilly meeny-faced Dadda, all poundin fru da kitchin.

So Dadda opined da door anna Dawg went OutSide, an den da Fat Cat an Dadda went back innu da Kitchin an Dadda poured Kitty-kibble inna bowls, anna Dawg began to bark greetin's toda udder dawgs inna area, an Dadda hollared, "Pack it in, Marc!" an Marc did, cos axtchually, he's preddy smart fora dawg.

An den Dadda sets da bowl ob kitty-kibble onna floor an stawts makin' tea for himself an coffee for Maman.

An he's wike, well, grumblin, to himself, sort ob rumblin wike his tea-wadder-boiler, sayin',

"Only got two hands..." an den he comes innu da Bun Room an opins Da Big White Box, takes outta milk jug, slams da door, an wooks at me an says, "An whutta you buggers want?"

An I wooked at him an sed...said, "We're fine. But da udder two... Well, dere mite be sum ishoos..."

But I don't fink he herd me, cos he was alreddy on his way back innu da Kitchin. Hoomins don't hab big ears for rilly good listenin'.

An dey only hab two hands...

Posted by Our Warren at 9:50 AM EST
Post Comment | Permalink
Saturday, 19 February 2005
Mood:  not sure
Now Playing: Crazy, Just Crazy... By George
Topic: Movin' On!

A brief sum'ry ob My Life since comin to Our Warren:

Noo home. Noo House. Noo Maman an Dadda. Noo Warren. Noo almost-mawmie. No new almost-mawmie. Noo wifebun (nice!) Noo Habbytat.

Now anudder Noo House, noo Bun Room anna'nudder Noo Habbytat.

Anna noo Dawg, anna noo cat.

Assa Gen'ral Rool bunnies don't like *Change* - and I'm finkin' dat dere is just a widdle too much obbit goin on rite aboud now.

Bunnies like whut we know: da pootie box in dis colour, at dis place, alla time; da food crock in dis colour, in dis place, filled at dis time, alla time. Same wiffa wadder crock anna fleecy blankie, anna seagrass mats. Rite where we left it, in dis place, in dis condishun, alla time.

Ebben if it's not perfect, an it's not 'zacktly as it perhaps should or could be, it's ours and we know it and 'speckt it.

You opin your eyes inna mornin, an ebberyfing is "Hokay", you know? Sure, mebbe Owd Hunny hassa wind up that's got the room smellin 'nuff to make your head spin an your ears droop, but it's hokay, cos you know dat he's ober dere, habbin hay an habbin a nap. Ob course, you sort ob wish dat he didn't habba wind up along wiffit, but dere's a down-side to ebberyfing, right?

An den One Day, you wake up, opin your eyes an Owd Hunny has gone. But's dat's still hokay, inna way, cos he's bin tellin you aboudda Rainbow Bridge, an how he's bin seeing His Maggie an His Poet in his owd bunny dreams, an how he just can't cope wif ebberyting an how tired he is, an how much his insides hurt, an how lucky he is to be Firteen-anna-half yeers owd an how most ob alla dat time, he's bin a rescued bunny. An he's been helpin you to unnerstan a wotta fings - an I do mean a whole wotta fings.

So when he leaves for the Rainbow Bridge, you're sorry dat you are left behind an stuff, but you are happy for his sake dat he's on his way.

Dis kinda *Change* is Normal.

But moovin' houses is Not Normal.

You should nebber habba leave The Warren, no madder whut. The Warren, ebben if it's not perfeckt, is still, The Warren.

So Hokay, ebberybunny is heer inna Noo House an that feels rite. An alla furnitchur is heer, an that smells rite.

But then there's the Noo Bun Room an that doesn't feel right an the Noo Habbytats an they don't smell rite an you kinda loose your sense of directshun.

You wake up, an it's like, "Whut da heck?"

An Maman all skert aboudda "bills" anna "munny" anna "counts" an as she calls it, "whut goes where and to whom from which" cos it's stuff she's not good at, nuffin wike music or History, an Dadda racin' around wike a chased bunny, tryin to do ebberyfing on his ownst, cossa dere bein just him an Maman an Maman bein' not-so-well.

An when your Maman is skeert, lemme tell you, ebberybunny else is preddy darned skert rite along wif her, too. When Maman can't ebben fink ob whut to eat fer Tea, whoa, you know fings are going pear-shaped inna hurry - and I don't mean da kinda pears you kin eat, eidder.

Cos she told me she's so 'fraid ob makin a mistake. She nebber wants to do ennyfing da wrongk way-round. Nebber cause ennybun trubble or inconbeenyance, nebber do whut's not rite, nebber choose the wrongk pafway, nebber - in her werds - "Screw up".

Now, she's been told dat ennyfing dat's done "in Love" is not wrongk. Or dat enny decision dat's been considered, an thought through an chosen prayerfully, and thoughtfully, will be the bestest one to make - well, she won't rilly beeleeb dat, cos she allus finks she could hab done bedder if she had only tried harder.

Only Tried Harder

Well, while she's tryin harder, she's wearin herself out an wearin us out wif her tryin, too.

An den, ebben afta she's gone an dun sumfing, she allus feels dat she's somehow "screwed up", so we feel dat we hab "screwed up", too, just cos dat feeling of gen'ral screwyness is inna air.

An meanwhile, ebberfing is changing, wedder we want it to or not.

An ebberyone 'specktin Maman to probide answers to dere questshuns, while ebben she don't habba answers, an don't habba energy or unnerstandin to provide da answers, an bein afraid ob gibbin da wrongk answer or ebben bein s'spekted ob not gibbin da rite answer, or not tryin hard enuff...

Know whut I mean? We're rowin' a boat wif one oar.

It's just crazy around heer. Crazy.

So we got dees noo habbytats an dey are huge, roomy habbytats, wif coated wire dat I can't chew on, (so Makin' A Hole has gone outta da question), an tops so we can't be visited by dat Dawg or Da Catz, an wheels so we can be moobed, an being two-foots offa ground so we're taller den alla udder four-foots inna houz - which is preddy neat, if you axt me. Now I kin wook dat Collie Dawg inna eye ebbery time he goes by an I kissed his nose dis mawnin, which 'prised da heck outta him. (Cos Belinda bited him!) An he sneezed on me, which was preddy yucky for a few minutes. Luckily, dog-snot is mostly wadder.

So *Change* is bof good and not good. It just IS.

An it's gonna come, no madder whut decisions Maman makes. She can't be perfect, anna *changes* aren't gonna wait for her to dither ober. She's got to set her feets an her faith an just go wif Wun Day's Werry Atta Time.

An about Hunny an Hawthorn, an Belinda, an Oscar, an Tulip, an Gideon, an Mister Bean, an Dove an Angel, an alla udder bunnies who hab left heer to go to the Rainbow Bridge... Dose are Big Changes, too, an hoomins don't seem to unnerstan dose well, eidder.

But you know wut? Phil-the-Lad told me dis:

Sumtimes you hab to lose sumfing great to make room for bigger and bedder fings.

Dat's da Cirkul dat Hunny talked about to me. An it's da Way ob Fings. Bunnies unnerstan dis a wot bedder den hoomins do, I fink, which is kinda why I was 'prised when Phil-da-Lad got it, too, cos he's notta bunny.

But Hunny 'splained it to me wike dis: If nobunny ebber went toda Bridge, dere would be no place for me in Our Warren, an soon da whole werld would be full up ob bunnies wifoud warrens or Mamans or Daddas, an everybun would be OnAlone, forever, lost inna crowd ob strangers. Dis way, we moob frum place to place, frum nowhere, to heer to Da Rainbow Bridge, then on to Da Meadow an then on to the Great Journey to the Greater Warren wif our Mamans an Daddas - and who knows where afta that?

But the fing is, it's going to happen, an it's not sumfing dat we can "screw up".

It's not a test. It's not aboud bein' perfeckt. It's not that we're geddin' grades on ebberyfing we do or say. It's just Life: To be lived and loved, to give and to reciebe; ebberyfing in it's own time.

I just hope Maman geds those noo pootyboxes, though. Cos dis wun just needs a *change*!

---By George ob Our Warren---

Posted by Our Warren at 11:32 AM EST
Post Comment | Permalink
Saturday, 4 December 2004
The New Adventures of George
Mood:  chatty
Now Playing: Big Time
Topic: Movin' On!
So I got whut I wanted. I hadda werk at it, but I have finally pretty well convinced Maman that no hoomin can deterr a determined bunny.

The thing is, I live with Missy.

Not just "I *like* Missy." or "I *want* to *try* living with Missy." This is no *~bonding hextperiment~* that may or may not werk out.

I have known Missy a long time in bun-time and she knows me. We are alreddy a bonded pair.

This means that she and I have moved beyond that romatic song-writin' stuff I did before, innu the real-werld where we unnerstand that libbin togedder isn't all raisins and 'nanners, but hard pellets of mutual grooming and compromise.

We are bonded, have been bonded and will continue to be bonded.

Nobun gets sumfing for nuffin. And Missy is sumbun worth working to be with, lemme tell you.

So I stayed awake ALL last nite, and chewed a hole in record time from the li'l habbytat Dadda made for me, right into the Big Habbytat that I am used to sharing with Missy.

No goofing around with singing sad songs.

No whining Blogs about being hard-done-by.

No pooties about "getting even" or bragging.

I didn't unnerstand ebberyfing that was happening to me at furst - and I was mad about that - but then I realised that it was hokay, because I realised that unnerstanding ebberyfing wasn't going to help me get back to living with Missy. There is plenty of time for unnerstanding ebberyfing later - when I am living *with* Missy.

So I just set about making living with Missy come true.

I, George, made it happen the RIGHT way: I used my 'Tellygince and werked hard.

Missy is worth werking for. So I worked berry hard.

And you know whut? I'm sitting here beside Missy right now!

And now that I am living with Missy again, I am starting to unnerstand sum things!

1. The George Family Jools - well, I guess I don't need them. Jools don't make you 'Tellygint.
2. Sumtimes you lose stuff to get bedder stuff.
3. Sumtimes it hurts inna short run to feel bedder inna long run.
4. No matter how much you think you know, udder buns can know bedder - so nebber think you know it all, because you don't.
5. Good meddysin can taste really bad.

Belinda Bunny sed said dat ennybunny can grow Up, but only Smart bunnies can grow 'Tellygint.

And den Belinda Bunny sed: "An' Babby George, allus bemember dis - you are wun berry smart bunny!"

Hey, Belinda? See me now? I bemember!


Posted by Our Warren at 2:10 PM EST
Updated: Saturday, 4 December 2004 2:19 PM EST
Post Comment | View Comments (3) | Permalink
Friday, 3 December 2004
The New Adventures of George
Mood:  down
Now Playing: Under Pressure
Topic: Movin' On!
I have decided I do not like V-E-Ts.

I do not like cars.

I do not like a whole lotta things just now.

In fact, I amma Berry Dangerous George. So don't cross me.

I have also decided I do not like Maman or Dadda. For now.

Well, we'll see. I habben't made up alla my mind on dis one yet.

This comes afta some long considyashun, sittin inside my carrier in my habbytat. And gruntin'.

Shaddup, Hunny! (Inna werds ob Belinda.) I don't wanna hab enny hay and I don't wanna habba nap. Cos I hadda nap and I don't feel enny bedder. In fact, I feel worse.

It's like this:

I hadda go back to see that "Sharin" chicklet (as Beebe calls her) and I'm telling you, I AM NOT GOING BACK THERE AGAIN!

Yup, you heard me.

I've had it.

The first time wasn't too bad. She said I was preddy, and she petted me and gave me cuddles and then poked an prodded me, and stuk something in my ears to look in them and lifted up the bunny-lips to look at my teefies, and spreaded out my feets to look at my toes and alla that stuff.

The second time I was there I hadda nap and woke up missing parts ob ME.

I was a liddle bit confused onna issue obba missing parts, but I have now figgered it out and lemme tell you, I am steamed. Since this is a Family Blog, I can't tell you exactly which parts of me I'm missing, but let's just say dat when I took inventory, I discobbered that two huge gems have gone missin' outta the George Family Vault.

And nobunny consulted me!

And if that wasn't bad enough, yestidday, Maman got this look on her face when she and Dadda were makin' me drink that awful tastin' meddycin that Hunny is allus talkin' about.

And Maman sed, "George is swollen."

And I'm thinkin', "Hey, no joke! You'd be swollen too if you'd had the Vault robbed! Put me down!"

And Dadda sed, "Well, he'll have to go back to the doctor. That's what she said: 'If he's swollen, bring him right back.' I'll call as soon as I take you to work."

And Maman sighed and rubbed my ears and sed, "George, really, you shouldn't be doing this. I'm not in the least ready to move, nothing is done, the truck is coming tomorrow and now you're swollen."

And she thinks she has problems?

To date:
1. I have been poked and prodded.
2. I have been placed inna fake nap.
3. My bum hurts.
4. I can't sleep with Missy.
5. My habbytat is being taken apart.
6. My raisin ration has been cut down!
7. I haven't been groomed in twodays.
8. I'm stuck in a smaller habbytat.
9. I am taking meddysin!
10. Somebunny stole the George Family Jools!
11. I gotta go back to dat V-E-T person?

Oh NO! I protest. I'm putting my foots down! Dis is not happinin' to me!

Hey! Put me down!

Help! I'm in the carrier! Lemme out! Lemme out! Hunny! Mouse! Beeb! MISSSSS-EEEEEE!

Oh pooties.

I am back.

I am sulking.

Whaddoesshemean, "Dere is nuffin' wrong wif George"?

Dere most certainly is something 'wrong' with George!

George is mightily annoyed.

George still doesn't feel good.

George hadda take more meddysin tonight.

No! I will not "Hab sum hay an' habba nap", Hunny! Dis is notta joke!

I got taken inna car toda V-E-T again.

And do you know whut? She picked me up and poked and prodded me inna tender place and den put me down and sed dere was nothing wrong wif me! She said I would "go down" natchurally.

"Don't werry", she says.

"Don't werry."

I am rilly riled up ober dis.

Well, you know whut? When Dadda comed in dis morning to habba look at me, I runned innu da carrier, and I grunted.

Dat's rite!

Me, George, grunted. For da furst time in my life, I warned 'em - Stay away frum George.

Cos widdle Babby George has hadda 'nuff.

Dey hab poked me an prodded me and squirted meddysin in my mouf, and carried me all ober da place inna car, an' I'm not gonna take dis ennymore!.

I am offishully *grumpy*.

And I'm not gonna be un-grumpy for awhile.

At least not until dey put back my George Family Jools.

Posted by Our Warren at 7:52 AM EST
Updated: Friday, 3 December 2004 7:59 AM EST
Post Comment | Permalink
Saturday, 27 November 2004
The New Adventures of George
Mood:  cool
Now Playing: Activity. Have some!
Topic: Movin' On!

Maman says I'm an "Acive Rabbit".

Several months ago, I wouldn't know if this was something I should be proud of or not, but now that I am a 'Tellygint Rabbit, I know.

It is a Good Thing.

You know how I know this?

It is becos I can REED.

That's right. Because I can reed, I know that it is GOOD to be an Active Rabbit.

Whut I don't know is if Maman and Dadda need me to be 'Active" or not. I think it might be good for them, but I'm not sure.

It starts like this: Not ebberybunny can reed. Maman told me that reeding issa skill, which is something that a bunny can learn. It's part of being 'Tellygint.

Reeding is mostly sitting on Maman's lap, looking atta 'puter screen and knowing whut alla werds onna screen mean. That's most of it. The other part of it is looking at Maman an listening to her use those werds to me and picking out the ideas that mean something from the ideas that are "Pure Lunacy".

"Active" might fall into this caty-gory from whut I unnerstand.

Which isn't much, but here goes...

So today Maman and I were sitting there, looking through the noospapers like we allus do, and there was an artykul about being fat and being onna diet and being healthy and "Active". So Maman starts reading the artykul out-loud to Dadda.

Do you know that hoomins are not 'lowed to have too many treats? I didn't know this. I thought they ate anything they wanted.

Turns out, they can't. Well, not with Maman around. Dadda came back into the office with some bread and some cheese and Maman said that he would need to become "Active" if he was going to keep that up.

And then Maman went on and sed that she and Dadda are not "Active" enuf to be habbin bread and cheese and Maman's favourite, which at the moment is Punk'in Pie.

Dadda said he was plenty "Active", what with being waked up ebbery nite by Stoopit Catz, and having to throw them off the bed, and moving house and all.

And Maman said that this was not the same kind of "Active" she was talking about. The kind of "Active" she was talking about is habbin "Ex-ster-size".

And Dadda said that he gets plenty of "Ex-ster-size" walking back and forth to the 'Fridgerator.

So Maman said, "That's the point. We need to be more 'active' like George."

And Dadda said, "George is too bloody 'active' by half."

At which Maman sed, "You'll notice that George is not ten pounds overweight."

And Dadda said he wasn't ten pounds overweight either, that it was more like twenty and I am not overweight for want of trying, because I eat alla treats I can lay my paws on.

Which is true, but that's a bunny's job.

So Maman figgered out that Dadda and her need to walk ebbery day wiffa Border-Collie Dawg.

I'm not sure what the Dawg has to do with things. Nor is the Dawg, but Belinda told me that he's so stoopit, he'll go along with anything because dawgs will do anything to please.

Maman sed that walking dis dawg will somehow be good for her and Dadda, because it will make them be more like me, which is, namely, "Active".

Now I am a 'Tellygint Bunny, and I can reed, so I know that it is important for everybun to be "Active" so that they will not be fat, but whut I can't figger out is what this all has to do with me, and what it has to do with the Border-Collie Dawg.

I can see where this Dawg and I are "active" and this is good for us, but where does Maman get the idea that our being "Active" will be good for her and Dadda?

I mean, I walk a lot. I hop. I binky. The Collie-Dawg walks around his yard, and barks, and chases his ball. This is "Active". Maman and Dadda reed a lot, and type a lot, and talk a lot. They are not "Active". So if we are and they aren't, how is us being and them not going to help them become? Know what I mean?

What's this got to do with us?

Hunny said for me not to werry about it - Maman's ideas don't usually last long.

He said: "Hab sum hay, an hab a nap. When you wake up, she'll hab fortygotted all about this 'walks' stuff. It's just Maman - her brain issa lot more 'active' than the rest of her."

I hope so. So does the Collie-Dawg.

Posted by Our Warren at 2:35 PM EST
Post Comment | Permalink
Tuesday, 16 November 2004
The New Adventures of George
Mood:  don't ask
Now Playing: Uh oh
Topic: Movin' On!

Well, I might as well admit it. I have been a naughty George.

Maman said that I have to "Own up."

Hunny said that it wassa case of "Youthful Stoopidity".

Mouse said, "Don't expect me to cover for you, mate."

And Beebe said it was so cool, we'll have to do it again sumtime.

That's before Maman chased him back into his habitat again today, and gave him "A Good Talking To."

Hey, I only got a "Lecture"! Which is less severe.

It all happened yesterday.

Yesterday started off preddy good. I'd been at werk on some more of those holes and this time, I managed to finally squeeze outta one. Not bad. I can get really skinny when I wanna.

So I went over to Beebe's habbytat and showed him where I'd previously chewed a hole for him that Dadda hadn't managed to quite close off. Well, Beeb got all hextcited and knocked the door-post loose.

That's not my fault. I didn't know he was gonna stand back and take a run at it, did I?

And so.

Well, the sun was shining.

That's it. The sun was shining, and Maman was downnastairs habbin coffee with Dadda and they were talkin about going to some hospiddle or something, and Phil wasn't awake and nuthing was going on. And the Beeb and I were Two Rabbits Lookin For Adventure.

Okay, so we were only looking in the Bun Room, but it's a good-sized room.

And the sun was shining and it was a preddy nice day, and there was this bale of hay that was sitting there onna middle of the floor.

Now you have to unnerstand about hay.

Hay comes in big box-shapes called bales. They are tied with string, which keeps them togedder.

Until you bite through the string.

Then they kinda fall apart, all ober. Then you can dig inn'em. And tunnel. And eat. And binky. And eat. And roll. And pull'em apart. And sort of run-really-fast-without-geddin-anywhere's. And then dig some more. And eat.

And after awhile of this, Beeb said, "I'm gonna go visit Missy."

And I'm like, "Hold on, Dood. That's MY womin."

And Missy's like, "Who you callin your womin? I'm my own womin! Get outta here, Beebe-Bunny!!"

And then Clover comes over to where the door-post is leaning and she starts with a good-sized *thump*, and hollars, "Beebe-Bunny!! You get home here this instant!"

And she comes outta her habbytat to see what's going on.

And here I'm inna big pile of hay, and the sun is shining, you know, and there goes Beebe, into see Missy!

Well, Hunny looks over and says, "Uh oh." and goes back to eating his hay.

So I tried a *thump* to warn Beebe that visiting in my habbytat was a bad idea, but with the hay and all, it was preddy feeble. So I rushed over to my habbytat just as Beeb went in through the same hole that I came out of.

But Beeb is a fast li'l guy, him being a Hot-Tot, which is really just a black-tipped version of a white Netherlands Dwarf, and so he and I did a three-sixty around the habbytat, with Missy-inna-middle.

Which she didn't like.

And Mouse is lookin on from his habbytat onna clothes-press, and he says, "You two make an awful racket. Can't you keep it down?"

And then Missy *THUMPED*.

Now she is one big gurl; feet like paddles. So when she *thumps*, it's got authority innit.

And Beeb jumped about a mile and just about met up with Clover who was at that moment hauling her generously-sized-and-nicely-tailed rear-sections over the side of my habbytat.

They were surprised. In passing.

So I ducked out the hole, went over the hay-pile and caught up with Beebe in his habbytat.

And then a bunch of things happend all at once:
Mouse shouted, "Maman!"
I heared feets onna stairs.
Dadda shouted, "Bugger!"
and there was this dead-calm voice that cut through everything, and just froze me, solid, to the floor:

"Young man!"

And suddenly I was up inna air, nose to nose with Maman.

And she said, "Look at this mess!"

So I looked and she's up to her knees in hay.

And she said, "Did you do this?"

Now what do you think?

You do not go nose-to-nose with Maman and lie. You fold back your ears, wiggle your nose and look at your toes which are almost going up your nose anyway. Even better if you can blush, but with fur, it's hard.


So I gotta "Lecture".

About being Honest.
About taking Responsibility.
About Owning Up.

While Dadda cut pieces of lattice work and plugged up alla my holes and fixed Beebe's door post and carried Clover back to her habbytat, Maman told me her "Lecture".

Then we all had to sit in our habbytats while Maman tried her hand at sweeping alla hay.

A pile of hay is a lot bigger than a bale.

Then Maman gave out raisins, because she said we all Had Learned Our Lesson.

Hunny said he knew the lesson already but was always up for raisins.

And then Maman picked me up again.

"Is George sorry?" she asked me.

Well, look at it from my point of view.
On the down-side, I got a "Lecture".
But on the plus-side:
1. I had fun in the hay.
2. I played outside my habbytat for a good almost-hour.
3. I played chase with Beebe.
4. I had a raisin snack.
5. The sun was shining.

I folded back my ears, looked at my toes and tried to blush or something, then lifted up my chin and kissed Maman onna nose.

Posted by Our Warren at 9:42 PM EST
Post Comment | View Comments (1) | Permalink
Sunday, 14 November 2004
The New Adventures of George
Mood:  a-ok
Now Playing: Our Warren is Upset
Topic: Movin' On!

I am back.

I am George - a growed up, literate, 'Tellygint Companion House-Rabbit. Mostly. But I am undeniably, empatically George, bond-mate to Missy-bun, independent Rabbit, full-time, wholly-accepted, foot-thumping member ob Our Warren.

In other words, I am no longer "Babby George" da Liddle an Stoopit.

All righty then.

You will see that I can now read and use real werds. I can type much better than before. This is because I have been spending a lotta time sitting with Maman, just like Belinda told me to do; sitting and listening, sitting and reading the newspapers on-line, sitting at the 'puter and learning how it werks; just sitting and sitting!

And sitting is hard.

Sitting is especially hard when you have the wiggles and want to binky. Sitting is 'speshully hard when you look out of your window to see an all-blue sky dotted with white, dandylion puff-ball clouds, and crispy, confetti-coloured leaves spin by, caught on a breath of cold, crisp Autumnal wind. Sitting is even harder when you can hear dry, crinkly leaves skipping and chattering down the street, raked by an ice-tipped breeze while you're stuck, breeze-less with cental heating, inside.

But I have sat it out and am now typing real werds on the 'puter as a grown-up bunny.

Hunny says Belinda would be proud of me. He says I'm the second-generation of House-bunnies to use the 'puter, and the second-generation of Our Warren to be literate. He said I amma Future ob Lagomorphs and he is proud to have lived long enough to see the Future and that It is Me.

Yes, well, I have to take his werds very seriously, because he is a very old and serious rabbit, or a seriously old rabbit, or something. He is Our Elder Rabbit who was here from the beginning of Our Warren, and knows all there is to know about Living As An Urban Companion Rabbit.

So now, we Companion Rabbits of Our Warren are moving from this house to a New House. Hunny has moved before, and he says that it's no big deal, but Dadda says that it will be, because there are Special Circumstances.

The First Problemis that there will be Dawgs at the New House. It's not just that there will be the Border Collie dawg, Marc, it will be that there will be Sistah Beffy's dawg, CodiFox, that is a ShebuInnu or something - a kind of hunting dog that bites - that is not trustworthy around rabbits - that will be living in the New House with us. So, because there will be an untrustworthy dawg, there is...

The Second Problem, which is that Our New Bun Room in the New House is inna room that has the door to the back garden in it, and the dawgs must come through the New Bun Room in order to go outside. Dadda says all dawgs have to go "outside" many times a day, which means they also have to come "inside" an ekwell number of times. So the New Bun Room will have Traffic which is something our present Bun Room has never had. is obviously a Bad Thing against which special provisions have to be made, which leads to...

The Third Problem which is that our homes, our habitats, can no longer be on the floor as they are in our present Bun Room. For our safety, we have to be housed Two Foots Offa Ground With Lids, Maman says, to protect us from the Untrustworthy Dawg, which is CodiFox.

Maman and Dadda are NOT pleased about these three problems at all. Maman wants us to have the same homes as we do now. She feels that we don't need to suffer just because we have to move. She feels we should be getting better housing and not have to put up with CodiFox's bad manners.

I agree.


Dadda says "Things are as they are.", which means, We Have To Face Facts. So he is building homes for us that are high off the ground where dawgs can't reach us, and tall so there is room to hex-ster-size, BUT our homes won't have as much floor space as they have now. This means they won't be as big and roomy as they are now.

But Sistah Beffey says she wants to move out in a few months and have her own place and take CodiFox and her kitty, Gidget, with her.

Dadda says, "We'll see." which means, When He Sees It, He'll Belive It. So for now, we'll have to live in these new homes that don't have as much floor space.

Clover and Missy aren't happy about not having the same floor space as before and they are not happy about having homes with two storeys in them. They are mainly tubby female bunnies who don't like to move around very much. The idea of two-storey condo-type homes doesn't thrill either of them. In fact, they are upset about it.

Beebe and Mouse are impressed because they, like me, like Adventures in Lilving Space. But they are still upset, because everything upsets them one way or another because they are "sensitive" bunnies, Maman says. Mouse has been digging and spraying pooties all over whenever Dadda shows up with a tape-measure, and Beebe has been doing popcorn binkies over Clover's head and 'noying her greatly.

Hunny isn't impressed because he has Mobility Issues, like Maman, due to age, and can't get around easily. He won't have two storeys because he might fall and hurt himself, so he will just have less all-around room and that does not please him at all. So he is upset.

And now, Sistah Beffy is upset because she feels that Maman and Dadda don't like CodiFox. They do like CodiFox, but they don't like that she isn't well-trained and not trust-able.

And Phil-the-Lad is upset because he's in his own tangle about moving down to Mary-land with alla his stuff and his two cats, Toby-tay and KayCee, Kitty.

And that leaves Cokie-da-Fat-Cat upset because he won't know what to do without KayCee and do with Marc-the-Border-Collie.

And Marc is already upset because he can't figure out what's happening to his house with all the hoomins coming and going.

And Dadda is upset because he's got three weeks to get this all done and he is sick and going back and forth from the hospiddle for "Testings".

And Maman is upset because she's working and has to go see a new "nurologist" about her illness and can't do many of the things she sees needing doing.

And so, everybun is inna upset "UpRoar" here at Our Warren.

Except me.

I'm doing what Belinda told me to do before she left for the Bridge: sitting here, listening and learning, and getting more and more 'Tellygint... and being George.

Posted by Our Warren at 10:06 AM EST

Newer | Latest | Older