Now Playing: Bunnies Are For Real!
I fortygot to mention that Yestidday was Groundhog Day, and that Good Ol' Punxsutawney Phil of Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania predicted that we will have six more weeks of Winter, onna'count obba Fakt he saw his shadow and went home to his burrow!
Now, of course, everybun around here knows Punxsutawney Phil only visits "his" burrow when the television cameras come to a field nextest to him, onna'count obba Fakt that he issa pretty Tame Groundhog who lives the Literary Life inna Town Liberry with his HogWife and everyfing. A Troo Hextample of Groundhog Fine Living!
The Reason that I mention this is onna'count obba Fakt that HouzRabbits have come a Long Way frumma days of being confined to small cages in Sum Back Room just as Punxsutawney Phil has come a Long Way frum being hunted frum his burrow as being a "varmint" and is now a 'Peshul Event Co-Ordinator with His Own Hollyday! Menny Bunnies have Achieved Troo Home Ownership, With Ammenities, like Our Cousin Rainbow Ashy (about whom I told you Yestidday). Ashy even had PeaForce Radio that he listened to Every Morning! (This is my Favourite Link to Wunnerful Pickchurs by Beezer and Sundae's Mawmie, Our Auntie Judith!)
And Our Cousin Rainbow Eli hadda Bestest Friend Pete, who is *rilly* named Petra, like the Rose City (Maman said), 'cept that Budgies are like Bunnies in that hoomins oftin make mistakes about them being Male or Female when they are Young, and frequently get Mixed Up. This has even happined heer at Our Warren, when Foxie arrived with the name "Lightning" and the hoomin surrendering her said she wassa Liddle Boy-Bun! (And was she ever upset abouddit, lemme tell you!)
Even worse was Our Rainbow Beebe-Bunny!!, who even confoozled the V-E-T who was trying to neuter/spay him, who called up Maman and said, "Well, we were wrong and Beebe issa Liddle Gurl.". And then he called Maman back and said, "No, I was wrong - Beebe issa a Liddle Boy-bun!" and then called Maman back a Third Time and said, "Lookit, you can choose, onna'count obba Fakt This Liddle Bunny has BOTH!" So Maman said, "Poor bunny knows his name is 'Beebe', and he went in there a 'him' so he'll come out a 'him', too. So we'll stay with that." And That's How Our Rainbow Beebe-Bunny!! stayed a boy, but it was a close fing, lemme tell you!
This all comes, of course, of hoomins being Too Quick to Give Names to Bunnies. It Should Be that hoomins Wait Until We Bunnies Tell You Our Names.
It's like Missy.
Missy is my Beautiful BunWife of Gen'rus Pro'porshuns, but When Missy Furst Arrived in Our Warren frum being a Foster Bunny at Unkul Michael's (he is Dadda to Janie-and-Bailey) she came with the name of "Fluffy" attached to her like sum sorta tail-tag. Now, if you habba look at Missy, you just *know* her name isn't "Fluffy" and that if you call her "Fluffy" you are prob'ly looking to get *THUMPED*. So Maman and Dadda brought her home frum Unkul Michael's house in Noo Yawk, and Maman put her in her own habbytat and said to Dadda,
"I wonder Whut Her Name Is, because it sure isn't 'Fluffy'."
And Dadda said, "Well, she'll tell us When She is ready."
And Missy said she looked up at him frum her habbytat and was, like, "You fink?"
And Belinda Bunny (who was Top Bunny then) said, "Hextellent Bunnatude, child!" and did *footflicks* alla'round her habbytat to show Missy that having Bunnatude wassa Very Acceptable Behaviour in Our Warren, and something to Continue to Cultivate. Which Missy has.
And because I wasn't part of Our Warren yet, I didn't say ennyfing, but when I first met MissyBun, I was Impressed, lemme tell you!
And that's How It Is with bunnies. Names are Important To Bunnies. We don't just Give Them to Ennybunny that axts. A Name tells Who You Are, and is only shared with Sumbun You Trust. Of course, if you don't have a name when you arrive inna Warren, the Warren will Give Wun To You, but only afta they Know You.
MissyBun made the hoomins Guess. And finally, afta she had been in Our Warren for three-or-four-days, Maman said, "She's quite The Little Miss!"
And Missy said, "You Got It, Wady! I'm MissyBun!"
But I arrived inna cardboard box with Nothing Else. I was an Easter Bunny Dump that sum hoomin had dropped off inna bizzy V-E-T's office and then walked away! Just me-inna-box - no name, no age, no blankie, no bedding, no food, no wadder, NO NOTHING! Just a bare, stoopit cardboard box with me shut innit! Maman even hadda bring a Rescue Cage to Take Me Home.
So Maman brought me to Our Warren and started calling me "George". Well, I didn't know enny bedda onna'count obba Fakt I had been taken away frum my own Mawmie much too early, dropped off atta pet store and sold assa fluffy toy without the slightest knowledge of Who I Was or Whut I Did, so Whut Did I Know? I thought "George" wassa Pretty Good Name, so I stuck with it, and when I decided to tell Maman Who I Was, I told her, "George".
That kinda fing happins to YoungBuns quite oftin! That's how we end up with names that are not *quite* bunny names, or Not Our Names, or Confoozled Names. Like me,Hunny's name when he came to Our Warren was s'sposed to be "HoneyBunny" onna'count obba Fakt that he wassa Light Brown Broken miniLop, but as he said, the Whole Name Wasn't His Frumma Beginning onna'count obba Fakt that he wasn't Broken (although Maman insisted on having him "'fixed"!) and he was ennyfing 'cept "mini" being full-sized for him, and with a bigger-than-usual appetite for food (you gotta know miniLops!). He was the usual seven-pound miniLop for most of his life, which issa Far Frum Small HouzRabbit! So the "HoneyBunny" name Did Not Belong To Him. But that's Whut He Was Called when he wassa YoungBun and stoopit hoomins bought him and kept him inna cage inna basemint until Maman rescued him and brought him to live at Our Warren inna habbytat where he hadda bondmate, Rainbow Maggie, anna 'Puter and aksess to "OnLine" and he began Living Assa Urban HouzRabbit. So when he learned how to type onna 'puter, and began his Bunny Ministry at Saint Luke's Church with the Rev'rind Doctor 'Ginny Sheay, he typed notes to sick children, and he allus signed the notes that he typed "Frum Your Friend At Our Warren, me,Hunny" onna'count obba Fakt typing was a Very Noo Fing for him. So hoomins thought that was his name, "meHunny".
But his name was actually just "Hunny" because Maman used to tell him he was "Her darling sweet bunny-boy.".
Which was sorta the Same Fing that happined to Rainbow "I, Me, Madeleine " Hanson. She was a Liddle Brown Holland Loppy Bunny Gurl who was very Insistant Upon Being Herself (as she should!). Belinda Bunny called it "Having Bunnatude" and Encouraged Her even though Madeleine had Plenty Of Encouragement Without Belinda making Fings Worse. Madeleine wanted to be sure that ebberybunny else unnerstood that she was named "Madeleine" and not "Maddie" or sum udder silly hoomin-made-up nick-name. She was Madeleine! So she typed Who She Was, and so hoomins called her Whut She Typed.
But We Know Who We Are. And Bunnies don't Take Names Lightly. Small fings mean a Lot inna small, confined world obba Warren Unnerground, so the position obba ear, or the turn obba head means a LOT above ground, WhereEver We Are. Just like A Name is Very Person'al, so is Real Estate, onna'count obba Fakt, it issa 'Flekshun, like inna mirror ob Who You Are and How You Fink.
Now, heer in Our Warren, nothing is Simple. Everything issa Joint Decision By Ebberybunny onna'count obba Fakt that this issa Multu-Species Warren where EbberyBunny finks he/she is In Charge. Da Dawg, being a Herding Dawg on top ob just Being a Dawg, finks we are all In His Pack. Cokie-da-Fat-Cat being a Cat, on top of finking he issa Biggest Cat Around, finks we are all In His Chowder. Maman and Dadda, being hoomin, fink they are atta Top Obba Evolutionary Chain, Pay Taxes and are The Owners Obba Whole Circus. And of course We Bunnies know that this is Our Warren and I, George, am TopBun heer, no madder how much Peeing Dusty does (because no madder *whut* I can pee farther, faster and in a wider pattern than he can! Besides I have been heer Longer and I was 'Pointed by Belinda Bunny and learned Da Lore frum me,Hunny *Senior Bun* of Our Warren! And YES, I'LL SPRAY EVERY INCH OF THIS BUNROOM TO PROVE IT! Which is preddy much Why Dadda Put Uppa Partition between Dusty And Me, so we wouldn't see each udder and keep having This Argumint.).
It is preddy much as Maman says: "We gotta whole houz of 'Chiefs' and no 'tribal members', which Missy says is "Wrong!" onna'count obba Fakt that there is Dusty who is still too much obba YoungBun to hold a Position Of Enny Responsibility. Ebben Beep-the-Udder-Cat issa Top Member Inna Dawg's Imaginary Herd Of Wun. So ebberybunny heer is more or less "In-Charge" of Everybunny else, and Everybunny else rejects ennybunny else's Authority, which makes Life "preddy innerestin'" as Dadda allus says whenever we try to do ennyfing Alla Us Togedder.
Which is why doing More Entries about Dif'frunt Bunnies' Fine Living Arrangemints inna Future Posties obba Hay Diaries is Important - onna'count obba Fakt it shows how Far we bunnies have come frumma days when we were The Voiceless, sold as cuddly toys and given names that were Not Our Own, confined to cages in back rooms and left off in cardboard boxes when we were No Longer Wanted.
Bunnies are EveryWhere! We are Doing Lotsa Fings! Our Friend Greg issa Therapy/Service Companion Bunny To Auntie 'Manda. Our Cousin Sheeba takes Unkul Peter with her on airplanes all over the United States! Our Cousin Rainbow Ashy 'Stablished "Dandelion County, Ashyville, Callyfornia" where his Pete still lives anna PeaForce Radio still broadcasts the Morning Chorus to Auntie Laura. Sundae and Beezer have their Ownliest Catz, Kit-Kat and Pogo-the-Baby, and get their pickchurs taken alla time by Auntie Judith! And Our Friends and Relayshuns in SoCal, Norman and Ragin' Riley run their Own Company (with Auntie Carla), HareWEAR, while Rainbow Simon, Rainbow Murphy and Rainbow Chef Wally, Forever Mr June! continue to inspire Auntie Carla's beautiful HareWARE!Whoa!
We Bunnies have websites. We type blogs. We star in Video. We own Real Estate. We know about Fine Living. We Have Names!
Bunnies are Not Just For Easter! We are For Real!
------------------------------------------------ By George