Y'know, we heer at Our Warren can ged innu more stuff by just sitting around Doing Nuffin, still den most bunnies can ged innu by moving along at High Speeds.
So Maman had given us dose phone buks dat I typed about inna last Blog, and dat wassa'nudder ob dose Unique Disasters Inna Annuals Ob Maman, Queen ob Chaos.
Dis time da Disaster was mostly Fanks to Mr Mouse. Dis is onna'count obba Fakt dat none obba rest ob us bunnies rilly cared forda phone buks or found dem at all inner-restin cept for Mouse, but he gotta whole hang outta whut Maman calls "Makin' Confetti" right off and soon was tail deep inna'stuff. I meen dat his whole Habbytat was just cubbered wiffa stuf - widdle, tiny bits ob Mouse-chewed phone buk. It was 'mazin' alla werk dat bunny had put innu it!
And dis wuld all hab bin cute and hokay by Maman if he had kept it in his habbytat, except dat Mouse wikes to share. And so he spent a wotta time kicking da Confetti all ober da BunRoom Floor, where it was picked up by Dawg innocently wandering feets, and no-so-innocently wandering Catz and dere tails.
Beep-da-Udder-Cat took a reel fondness toda Confetti and dragged bits obbit wif her All Ober da Houz.
So when it showed up inna Lounge where ebben Bunnies don't go, Maman threw a fit.
And heer she comes innu da BunRoom wiffa full hed ob steam on, and stands ober Mouse and she says,
"Wookit, Mouse. In da werds ob Belinda Bunny, "I can't be havin' wif dis" and whut I can't be havin' with is this Mess you're causing all over this houz. Dere is Confetti inna Dining Room, and inna Sitting Room, and I ebben hab bin pickin' it outta da laundry baskit. Now I don't mind you habbin' had fun wiffa phone buk, but dis Confetti ob yours has got to Go."
So Mouse grunted at her and went to sit in his corner pootie-box to sulk. And, so, Maman went off Uppastairs to call Dadda, cos Maman isn't stoopit and she's not aboud to try and clean up da whole fing ob Mouse's Habbytat wif him innit on her own, wiffout habbin' Dadda dere who Mouse Respekts.
So just afta Maman swept out, heer comes da Dawg, followed by Beep (who owns da Dawg) wif Cokie-da-Fat-Cat stumpin' along inna aggrivated-sorta way behind.
Anna Dawg says to us, "Hey BunnyRabbits, whut's up? You got enny food becos I am outta kibble and I am hungree."
And he begins snufflilng ober da floor, wooking for stuff.
And Beep sits down unner'neaf ob MissyBun and me, cos she knows dat dis irrytates da pooties outta Missy, who hates catz, but becos she is unnerneaf ob us, Missy can't do a fing aboud'dit.
Catz just lub to be irrytatin'. They don't ebben hab to fink aboud doing it; it just comes to dem to do it nat'churally, assa ebberyday fing.
Anna Dawg wooks at Beep, kinda startled, wike he has suddinly been smacked inna hed wiffa Thot, and he says to Beep, "Hey! You know da Rool! No Catz Inna Bun Room!"
And Beep wooks at him, and bwinks her eye-lids and says inna bored voice, "Whutebber."
And meanwhile, Cokie-Cat goes to lie down by Mouse.
So Beebe-Bunny!! who libs acrosst da way frum Mouse, calls ober to Mouse and says, "YO! Mouse! You gots catz!" and he says it wike habbin' "catz" is sum kinda Social Disease or sumfing (which it is), and starts moobing his Belubbed Suffie to da back obba Habbytat, away frum any stray Cat-cooties dat might be flying fru da air.
Now ob course, since Beebe's Belubbed Stuffie rilly is a plush, stuffie toy-bunny, Beebe hasta sort ob gently nudge her wif his nose to ged her to moob ennywheres, BUT onna'count obba Fakt dat Beebe doesn't realise dat his Belubbed Stuffie rilly issa plush, stuffie toy-bunny, and finks dat it issa a reel bunnyrabbit dat has come to lib wif him since CloverBun, his wife-bun, left forda Rainbow Bridge, Beeb has kinda gone a widdle OverBoard, and finks dat he hasta talk to his Belubbed Stuffie wif widdle grunts and honks wike it is a rilly elderly, deaf bunny.
So Beebe is dere in his habbytat, honkin' and gruntin' away to his Belubbed Stuffie and warning it aboudda Cat-cooties dat he is sure, in his addled widdle bunny-brain, are streaming offa Cokie-cat who is unnerneaf ob Mouse's Habbytat.
Anna Dawg is by us, sorta starin' in perplexity at Beep, who is unnerneaf ob Our Habbytat, not moobin', and violatin' da No Catz Inna BunRoom! Rool.
And den, ob course, dere is Cokie (who issa 40Lb. Maine Coon which is wun Rilly Big Fat Cat) who us unnerneaf ob Mouse's habbytat, and Mouse is alreaddy inna Bad Mood onna'count obba Fakt dat Maman has just told him dat she's gonna Clean Out Alla Confetti dat he's werked so hard to make outta his phone buk.
Just so you hab a clear pikchur ob how fings are at just dat sekond.
Soda Dawg begins to frown, cos heer's Beep, violating a Rool and she doesn't care. And he's habbin' a Hard Time puzzling dis out, cos dis Dawg puzzles easy, lemme tell you.
And just aboud den, Mouse peers ober da side ob his habbytat and sees Cokie-da-Fat-Cat down below and he shouts out, "Hey Cat! Ged out!"
And Cokie wooks up, flips his tail (which is an insult in "cat") and says, "Yeah. Right."
And I'm wike, "Why are you Catz in such a bad mood?"
Anna Dawg says, "Dadda sed dere issa Werld Wide Shortage Ob Cat Kibble. And dere Bowl is empty. Dey down to habbin Wun Meal a Day at Nite frumma can!" And den he wooks around proudly and says, "But dere is Dawg Kibble - cos I hab just et it - and dere is Bunny Pellets cos I hab just eated all dem what was onna floor. Maman says I amma Reg'lar Vacuum Cleaner On Legs! But dere is NO Cat Kibble inna Whole Wide Werld becos dere issa Werld Wide Shortage ob Cat Kibble."
And MissyBun stawts laffin'.
Furst ob All she hates Catz, onna'count obba Fakt dat some mean catz had teased her whin she wassa widdle babby, before Unkle Michael in Noo Yawk rescued her, and
Sekond ob All becos Cokie had made fun ob her a widdle while ago by telling her dat dere wassa Werld Wide Shortage Ob Bunny Pellets and dat we would hab to eat Hay for days and days.
And just about dat sekond, Mouse got 'nnoyed becos Cokie wasn't moobing frum unnerneaf ob his Habbytat wike he'd been told.
So Mouse peed on sum ob his Confetti dat he had made frumma Phon buk and kicked it ober da side obba Habbytat and da Confetti showered down onna Cokie-Cat.
And Cokie-Cat yells, "Ewwww! Rabbit-Cooties!" and bounces up inna air and takes off outta BunRom Door as fast as his feets can carry him.
And becos da Dawg is stoopit, he runs afta Cokie woffin, "No Catz Inna Bun Room! No Catz Inna Bun Room!" wike he'd been da one who was enforcing da Rool, and not Mr Mouse wif his smelly Confetti.
So now they are atta doorway toda BunRoom and Cokie turned himself around and is he ebber 'nnoyed. Cos now he wants innu da BunRoom to yell at Mouse and heers a Border Collie, clogging uppa doorway. So Cokie toda Dawg,
"Moob aside, Dawg! I'm comin' back in cos I wanna werd wif dat Mouse!"
Anna Dawg is standing atta BunRoom door, blockin' uppa whole fing, and he says toda Cokie-Cat, "No Catz Inna Bun Room! You know da Rool: No Catz Inna Bun Room! No Catz Inna Bun Room!"
Anna Cokie-Cat, who has bits ob wet Contetti stickin' toda top ob his hed, wooks atta Dawg and says inna rilly, lebbel, ebben voice, "Dawg. Ged. Outta. My. Way."
Anna Dawg wooks puzzled fora momint, and den alla suddin, sumfing wike a grenade goes off inside ob his Border Collie Hed, and he gibs out dis giant, fur-flattening "WOOF!", right inna Cokie-Cat's face.
Anna Cat just stands dere. And you can kinda wike see da whole Anger fing just growing bigger and bigger behind his eyes, sorta inflatin' wike a wadder balloon fulla acid. And den it pops.
Anna Cokie-Cat does no more den reach back wif wunna his big frunt paws, balled up wif alla claws tucked up inside obbit, and WHAM! he punches da Dawg right onna nose.
Anna Dawg, who issa rilly justa Big Baby (as Maman says) lets out dis involuntary yelp! and goes off wooking for Maman so fast dat he geds paw-spin onna Bun Room floor.
So, suddinly, BOF Catz anna Dawg are now runnin' at High Speeds outta da BunRoom, and all Three obb'em are screamin' dere heds off for Maman.
And Maman is comin' Downnastairs frumma Office, ennyways, so she gets mobbed inna Dining Room wif all Three obba two Catz anna Dawg, all yellin' datta Udder Wun started It.
So Maman finds a chair, and checks ober da Dawg to see if dere is enny damage toda Dawg-nose dat she shuld talk toda V-E-T aboud, but dere issn't, onna'count obba Fakt dat Cokie had tucked up his claws and only nailed da Dawg inna nose wif his paw. So Maman puts da Dawg Outside inna Back Gardin in order to distract his 'tenshin frum worryin' aboudda State ob His Nose (and since his batteries was kinda low ennyways afta habbin' used uppa'wotta wattage wif dat "woof", distractin' him wasn't hard. It just took a few squirrels.).
And den she checks ober da Cokie Cat and saw dat dere was nuffin da matter wif him dat she needed to talk ober wiffa V-E-T. And she piked da bits ob Confetti offa top ob his hed and told him dat he hadda "Stop 'nnoyin' Mr Mouse. It isn't nice."
And den she commed innu da BunRoom and stands ober Mouse, and she wooks down at him and says, "And as pertains to you, Mister..."
And Mouse wooks up at her and glares, cos he was, wike, still totally 'nnoyed ober just aboud ebberyfing dat had been going on.
And Maman continued, "And as pertains to you, Mister Mouse, you are habbin' your habbytat cleaned out as soon as your Dadda comes home. Because in the immortal werds ob Belinda Bunny, I can't be habbin wif dis!"
---------- By George