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Sunday, 10 April 2005
ComunnyKayShun
Mood:  irritated
Now Playing: Anudder Pause
Topic: Libbin Assa Urban Rabbit

Belinda Bunny used her Blog to commint on Current Events. Axtually, she used it to tawk aboud whutebber came innu her hed furst, an a wotta whut came innu her hed had to do wif whut was goin' on inna werld in gen'ral.

Now, cos I am still a youngbun an' not quite as 'Tellygint as Belinda, I hab consintrated more on lernin' an sharin' infortymayshun, an not so much on sharin' my 'pinions on werld affairs. But just cos I don't share my 'pinions doesn't mean dat I don't hab 'pinions - just dat I don't share'em.

Know whut I mean?

Well, now I'm gonna share one ob my 'pinions.

Ready?

Here goes:

Stoopit hoomins go ebberywheres.

Dat's rite. Dey do.

No madder where you go, you will run innu stoopit hoomins.

Now, you will notis dat bunnies sort of worry aboud becoming 'Tellygint - for us, bein' 'Tellygint issa Goal In Life. Dis is becos when you are a Prey Annymul, bein' stoopit is not a choice dat will grant you a long an' satisfaktory life. In fackt, bein' stoopit will just aboud allus gar-ran-tee dat you will habba short, nasty exsistance, followed by a terryfyin' end. So bein' stoopit is not whut you wuld call a good Life Choice for ennybunny.

Which is why 99.99999% obba bunnies opt for growin' 'Tellygint.

But hoomins don't. An ebberywheres you go inna werld you will find Stoopit Hoomins.

Now heer is why I fink dis:
1.) Dis mornin', while I was readin' da noospaper wif Maman, I finded dis HedLine: "No Hop For Older Rabbits". So I finked, "Whutdaheck is dis?" an heer wassa artykul sayin' aboud how hoomins were dumpin' dere older bunnies outside so dat dey culd "replace" dem wif cuter, young bunnies dey are findin' at Easter-time. Anna RSPCA, which issa Annymul Welfare Police in Inkwand, which issa YouNited Kingdom, was pickin' up alla bunnies dat dey culd and gettin' dem innu shelters where dey wuld be safe.

Now whut culd be stoopiter den dis? Hoomins wif perfektly good companion bunnies are dumpin' dem so dey can get udder, widdle bunnies? WHY? Dis is unbelieveably sad! To ged rid obba friend just to ged anudder one? It makes no sense. And it is cruel. Dees stoopit hoomins Do Not Deserb To Hab Companion Bunnies Nebber Again!. *THUMP* Dey deserb to hab sumfing painted on dere heds dat will stay dere forebber dat says, "Dis Issa Stoopit Person! Not Allowed to Hab Pets!"

So dere apparently are a wotta stoopit hoomins in Inkwand.

Da good noos is dat Dadda got outta dere bifore he got stoopit wike dem, cos I habba feelin' dat stoopitity is kinda wike a disease: it spreads.

But den, dere are a wotta stoopit hoomins inna pwace called Australia, an inna YouNited States, too, who dump bunnies at Easter Time.

I know. I wassa Dumped Easter Bunny. An I can tell you - bein' shut up inna box an bein' left OnAlone inna V-E-Ts' office is terryfyin'. You try it. It sucks.

2.) A nudder rezon why I fink dat hoomins allow too much stoopitity in dere species is dis: You know dat berry brave, berry kind Pope dat just crossed ober Da Rainbow Bridge? Yeah, him. John Paul (only he hadda nudder name bifore he was 'dopted assa Pope - sumtimes dis happins when you are 'dopted, dat you gedda noo name) crossed da Rainbow Bridge anna wotta hoomins gaddered togedder inna pwace called It'ly to lite candles for him an ebberyfing, to help lite his Pafway Toda Bridge. An den dere's dis Bishop, who has wike NO SENSITIBITY to ennyfing, an he hasta go an ged his name inna noospapers by speakin' ill obba Depawted.

Now whut's up wiff'at?

I mean, dere is plenty ob time for a hoomin to stand up an say, "Hey you. I don't wike whut you are doin'." when da person is alibe an can tawk aboud da rezons why dey are doin' whut dey're doin'. But to wait until dey are crossin da Rainbow Bridge an den shoutin' out, "Hey you!" - I mean dat's just poor manners, you know? So howcome dis Bishop of Litchfield is only bein' critical now? Mebbe cos da weight ob his Bishop's hat is, wike, compressin' his good sense? Or issit more impawtant for him to ged his face inna noospapers den to respeck sumbunny who he don't agree wif, but who at least was honest an forthright all his life?

You godda wonder, you know? So rite away, den, we gots Stoopit Hoomins in Inkwand, Australia, da YouNited Kingdom, anna YouNited States an den in It'ly.

3.) An heer's da Third Fing dat has me convinced dat hoomins are choosin stoopitity assa Life Goal: Dis Prince Charles an his bondmate, Camilla geddin married. Well, you know, when I found Missy, an made dat hole so I culd go see her alla time, I wassa Happy Bunny. An ebben doh I made a mess ob my habbytat en ebberyfing, an kept Maman an Dadda awake by singin' my Makin' A Hole song fru da nite, nobunny sed ennyfing nasty to me aboudd'it. Dey were happy dat I was happy.

So whuttsamatta wif dis Prince guy bein happy? An why does marryin' his bondmate make him unfit to beda King? An why issit ebberybunnies' biznezz ennyway? Udder Hares toda Thrown hab married "commoners" bifore (I wooked dis up in Maman's buks), an ebben had kids wiff'em dat dey gabe royalty names to (which seems to be how royalty geds made - by bein' aroun'na Kings an soforth) so maybe da ones dat is hollerin' da loudest are da ones who didn't gedda invite to share da Weddin' Nanner wiffa Happy Couple?

I just hate it when I see sumbun who is happy an ebberybunny goes to a lotta trubble to pour a lotta ants on dere picknick (as Maman says). Cos atta end obba story, all you find issa whole lotta envy goin' on - green-eyed monsters inna Noos repawters, tryin' to create trubble where dere is none just so dat ebberybun will buy dere story an make dem munnies. Mebbe when dat Charles guy gets to be King, dere will be sum changes made at dat BBC pwace an den da winders will be opined, an alla doors, anna Troof will be 'lowed to come outside for ebberybun to see.

Now wuldn't dat be sumfing? Just da Troof, wiffoud a dwessup in coloured clothes. Whoa. Now dere's a concept! Insted obba wotta "reality" stuff onna tellybishon, whut if we got to see "da Troof"?

Nahhh. We won't. Nobunny will, not ebber. Cos dere is no munny in axtin stoopit hoomins to form dere own 'pinions. Maman says it takes werk to fink up 'pinions, an sumtimes habbin' 'pinions can make a hoomin unpopular wif udder hoomins.

4.) Wike in Eye-Rak. More stoopit hoomins. Heer are a bunch ob hoomins tryin' to make a noo countree an 'lect a noo Top Bun. Hokay, dis is hard werk - belieb me, I know, cos when Hunny went to da Rainbow Bridge, we hab had trubble findin' OneBun to take ober bein' Top Bun heer. But in Eye-Rak, don't dees Stoopit Hoomins hab to go an habba Neggytib p'rade, complainin aboud how dey don't wike dis an dat? So, wike, if dey culd just ged togedder an 'lect a gobbermint ob sum kind, den alla udder hoomins dey don't wike wuld leeb ennyways.

So da ansur toda pwoblem is not to hold a p'rade wif critical floats an' re-enactmints an stuff, but to say whut dere guy can do dat is good forda countree an ged him 'lected so dey can help in buildin' da pwace back up.

Da ansur to enny pwoblem is not to compwain, but to do sumfing to help. If you don't godda idea aboud how to fix whut is wrong, den siddown an' shaddup an' wet sumbun else habba chance.

Issat so hard? Ushally ebberybun alreddy knows whut da pwoblems are. It's how to fix stuff dat has 'em confoozled. Cos you hab to grow 'Tellygint in order to fix stuff - stoopitity nebber fixed ennyfing.

So, by my count, we seem to hab stoopit hoomins in a wotta pwaces all ober da werld. In fackt, if you wook carefully atta noospapers, it seems wike stoopit hoomins are just aboud da onliest subjekt dat's bein' written aboud.

An' dis is disturbin, cos as ebbery rabbit knows - as ebbery prey annymul knows - bein' stoopid preddy much equals bein' dead inna neer footchur.

So, you know whut? I'd radder be 'Tellygint an werk at habbin 'pinions den be stoopit an den dead. Shure, it's easier to be stoopit; it's easier to be dead, too, but not much fun, an shure not berry useful.

So I'm gonna keep up werkin' on becomin' 'Tellygint, like Belinda told me. Cos choosin Life seems a whole lot bedder den choosin' to be dead.

------------By George

Posted by Our Warren at 11:56 AM EDT
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Wednesday, 6 April 2005
CommunnyKayShun
Mood:  d'oh
Now Playing: We Innerrupt Dis DikShunAiry...
Topic: Libbin Assa Urban Rabbit

We innerupt dis DikShunAiry to bring you da followin rant...

Yeah.

Well, you know, yesterday aftanoon we was preddy much mindin our own biznezz inna Bun Room - habbin' sum hay an habbin' naps an' all wike reg'lar bunnies - when Maman comes in an says to Dadda,

"I smell pooties."

Well, as we saw it, dat's No Big Deal. Smellin' is whut you're susposed to do wif pooties, which is why we do them - to let udders know where our individual bounderies happin to be located. Leebin' pooties is like printin' your address onna atmospheric noospaper - ebberybun knows where you lib an dat's preddy much dat.

So Dadda comes innu da Bun Room an hassa sniff an he wooks at Maman an says,

"Yeah."

An Maman goes to da hallway an brings out Mr Broom.

Well dis is No Big Deal eidder, cos she is allus geddin out Mr Broom an sweepin uppa Bun Room. It's Whut She Does. She sweeps up alla loose hay onna floor bifore da Stoopit Cat, Beep, can pik it up an carry it away to Udder Pawts Obba Houz (which is Whut She Does). An' Maman makes a pile ob un-eaten hay, stray pooties, lost pellets an kicked-out litter an den holds opin da Back Door an sweeps ebberyfing outta door - ushually on-toppa da Collie Dawg who happins to be comin' inna door when she is sweepin' stuff out, but dat's His Pwoblem an not Our Warren's.

So Mr Broom comin' out is No Big Deal.

Den Dadda gets da trash bin an Beebe-Bunny sees it furst an he calls out,

"YO!"

But since he's allus callin' out "YO!" nobunny pays him enny attenshun. Yellin' "YO!" is Whut He Does an' da rest ob us are used to it by now.

An den Mouse says,

"Uh oh..."

An we look up, cos Mouse don't ushally say dat.

An dere is Dadda wiffa trash bin.

An he says to Maman, "If we wheel Mouse out innu da middle obba floor, we can pull da bottom out..."

An wike he's sum kinda grocery cart, Dadda gwabs hold ob Mouse's apawtmint an pulls it out frumma wall innu da middle obba floor. An Dadda fiddles aroun' wiffa few clips, and gibs a tug, an da whole bottom ob Mouse's apawtmint pulls out frum unner him!

An dere is Mouse standin onna grate ob his cage, wookin down atta nekkid floor unnerneaf him!

Well, Mouse takes a BIG leap an lands in his pootie-box. At least he has solid ground unner his paws! He laid down dos pooties himself, so he knows dey are safe, but for how long? I mean, we all know dat pooties can pile high, but how long will dey last assa foundayshun fora radder well-built Nedderlands Dwarf Bunny-boy?

So Mouse is inna pootie-box, hangin' on for grim death wif big eyes.

An Maman an Dadda take da bottom ob his apawtmint downna hallway toda bafroom an dere issa sound ob lotsa wadder runnin.

An Missy lifts up her ears an says, "Oh no... hear dat?" an she back up inna hurry innu her pootie-box.

Da sound ob wadder runnin' can do dat to a bunny.

So den Maman an Dadda come back wiffa bottom ob Mouse's apawtmint an afta a wotta buggerin' about (as Hunny wuld say) dey getta bottom shoved back innu pwace.

So Mouse takes a step out ob his pootie-box an heer comes Maman wif Mr Broom!

So Mouse reverses gears an gets his butt back innu da pootie-box while Maman sweeps.

Den dat's done an Dadda wheels Mouse back innu his place.

An Mouse wooks down atta bottom ob his apawtmint an says,

"Dey taked my pooties!"

Well now. Dis is NOT cool. Speshully not when Mouse had gone to so much trubble to assemble such a good collectshun obb'em! I mean, dere was, wike, several days worf ob effort in dere and it was just gone, wike dat! Totally gone! Da whole bottom was bwight, shiney an completely cleen again. Just like noo.

An - ged dis - it didn't smell at all. Not one bit. Not ebbin faintly.

An Missy has her butt plugged firmly innu her pooti-box says to me,

"Tell me he issn't comin ober heer."

An I stood up an hadda wook, an shure enuf, heer comes Dadda toward me wif Maman behind him.

An Maman says, "You know, if we put summa dis stuff out onna garden, it will be good forda flowers if I rake it in."

An Dadda says, "Trubble is, dere is too much obbit. We put out alla dis stuff anna neighbours are gonna complain."

An Maman says, "You fink? We culd waid until Dark."

An Dadda says, "Well, I don't fink ebben Dark is gonna hide alla dis, ebben if we dump it all inna pond atta end obba garden."

And dere standin ober Missy an Me an wookin down. So I'm standin up wike I wanna pet, cos wookin cute ushally works to ged Maman to fortyged whutebber stupitidee she's currently workin on.

Bud not dis time.

Cos Dadda takes hold ob our apawtmint an rolls us out inna middle obba floor obba Bun Room an stawts tryin to pull outta bottom ob OUR apawtmint.

Only he can't.

Cos Missy is plugged innu her pootie-box, an I'm standin up down here by my pootie-box, so dere are two big bunnies atta end obba apawtmint, holdin ebberyfing down.

An Dadda says, "Wookit you two buggers..." An he pokes Missy's tail, but she don't moob. So he reaches in an puts his hand unnerneaf ob me an I kinda hop up an bounce down, which gibs me some spring offa da floor obba apawtmint, so I hop again, which gibs Missy a bounce an she comes unplugged frum her pootie-box an goes bouncin down da apawtmint, which gibs da floor some more spring...an preddy soon, we're bouncin UpAnDown cos we can't help ourselbs, onna'count obba floor bouncin wif us wike beans bouncin onna griddle.

An dere's Dadda, tryin to gwab hold obba bottom ob our apawtmint while we're bouncin wike beans an can't help ourselbes.

An rite aboud dat time, da whole bottom comes unstuck frum it's rails an sorta dwops all-at-once.

Well, Dadda catches it as it's goin' down, as Maman tries to gedda'hold obba'udder end, howebber, her shoulder don't werk too good, so ob course, she dwops her end ob fings an dere is hay an most ob our Winter coats all ober.

But Dadda managed to gwab hold obba main pawt which had most obba pooties.

So he said some werds inna speshul language he knows called "Anglo-Saxon" dat we Bunnies aren't susposed to know. Hunny knowed it, bud he sed I was too young to learn it. Da onliest werd I unnerstand innit issa werd, "bugger", which seems to appear quite a lot, so it must be an impawtant werd to be used so much.

So ennyways, I habba wook down an you know whut? All I saw unnerneaf ob my paws was FLOOR!

Dat was it! Da onliest fing between Missy an me fallin twoo foots to our deaths was dis bouncy floor ob our apawtmint. Who knew? I mean, dat all dat stood between us an disaster wassa bouncy sheet ob screen cobbered wif seagrass mats anna plastic slidy bottom!? No wonder Mouse had jumped innu his pootie-box when dey pulled his bottom out frum unner him!

Well, I tried gettin innu da pootie-box, too, but da ones dat we hab only accommie-date half-a-bunny ob my gen'ral size an shape. Missy an me aren't widdle Nedderland Dwarfs. Nope! We're wike large, ekonomy-sized rabbits ob gen'rous proporshuns! So when I got innu da pootie-box, I discobbered dat only da frunt pawt ob George fit - da whole back-end was hanging out. So I turned aroun an fit da back end in, but den da frunt end was hangin' out - so no madder how close togedder I put my feets, it didn't werk - dere was too much George an nod enuf pootie-box.

So I wooked ober at Missy an she was habbin da same trubble as me, only more obbit, cos she issa bigger bunny-gurl den me.

So.

Den Maman an Dadda comed back wif our bottom an Dadda stawts to slide it back in...

An it won't go.

An Dadda says to Maman, "It won't fit."

An Maman wooks unnerneaf an axts, "Howcome?"

An Dadda says fru his teefs, "Cos we hab two lard-butt rabbits warping the whole bottom of the habitat. Look at that! See if you can get Missy up to your end and I'll keep George down here."

So Dadda pokes Missy inna butt an she stawts bouncin again. Well, don'cha know dat when Missy stawts bouncin again, dat bounces me, too. So she's bouncin UpAnDown, headin towards Maman, an here I go, rite along wif her!

An Dadda's yellin, "George! George! Dis Way!"

An I'm yellin bak at him, "Lookit, Stoopit, I'm doin' my best heer..." while I'm bouncin UpAnDown nextest to Missy.

An Missy lets outta wail ob, "I don't wike dis!" an WHAM she wets go wiffa extry hard *thump* that sends me aboud sebben inches up inna air.

So while I'm airborne, Dadda gibs da bottom a good, hard shove, anna fing slams innu pwace unner'neaf ob us - so dat when I come down, I can see da floor disappearin' anna bottom come back.

So dat was reassurin'.

An' now our apawtmint don't smell ob nuthin ennymore, just wike Mouse's.

Home Sweet Generic Home.

An den it's Clover an Beeb's turn.

Well, Beeb issa slob an Clover issa Ms Marfa Stewart obba Bunny Werld. Only Clover is honest and don't do enny Insider Trading an she's notta Fashunnazi or ennyfing wike dat. Hokay, so she's not Marfa Stewart, but she issa berry clean an organised bunny. In fact, Maman has nebber seed a bunny who keeps a houz wike Clover does.

Clover carries alla uneaten hay toda frunt obba apawtmint so Maman can sweep it out ebbery mornin. An Clover will push a dirty pooty-box toda frunt obba'pawtimint for Maman to clean, too. An Clover don't wike to hab toys in her wadder crock an will pike dem out if Beeb frows dem in. An Clover is berry, berry neat about allus usin' her litter-box. She nebber hassa akydent, whereas Beebe is just one mobile akydent dat keeps on happinin ober an ober.

So, it's wike Beeb will pootie an pee ebberywheres except inna pootie-box.

He calls dis "freedon frum tyranny" but Clover says it's just laziness an whumps his butt ebbery now an'den.

But he's deboted to her, an keeps her nicely groomed and lubly, so dat's good.

So Maman an Dadda wheeled dem out innu da middle obba floor an pulled dere bottom out frum unner dem.

Well, by dis time, as Clover sed, she had time to see whut eggakly was goin' on, so she wasn't too boddered aboud'it. But she is anudder BIG bunny gurl an she was parked atta end obba apawtmint, so Dadda poked her inna butt, too, just wike he poked Missy.

An Clover took a big hop anna floor bounced.

Well, Beebe issa WOT smaller den I am. He's whut you call a Hot-tot, which issa speshul kind ob sort ob Nedderlands Dwarfie-shaped bunny wif black ear-tips an black eye-liner onna primarily white bunny. In udder werds, he don't weigh more den four pounds soakin wet - which is aboud half ob whut Clover weighs. So, ob course, when she bounced down onna floor, he bounced up aboud twice as high. I mean, he rilly got some altytood goin'. Like, if he'd put his ears up, he culdda touched da top ob his apawtmint an Clover can only do dat if she stretches up on her hind-wegs on tippy-toe.

So when Clover gave dat hop, Beebe was off wike a rockit.

An "YO!" was wike aboud half ob whut he yelled onna way up. Da rest don't translate outta Lagomorphin. Anna good fing, too.

So afta awhile, dere bottom comed back an it had no smell at all.

So heer's my rant:

Bunnies go to a wotta trubble markin out dere terrytorry an makin it dere own. So howcome issit dat we are not 'loud to keep fings in our homes da way dat we want dem?

I mean, heer we are inna Noo Bun Room. We gots noo apawtmints, clean bottoms, clean pootie pans, clean crocks, clean wadder - clean ebberyfing - an we hab to stawt ALL OBER AGAIN, geddin fings back to da way we want'em. An whut happins nextest? Maman, Dadda an Mr Broom will be back. It's happined bifore an it will happin again.

How on Earf can you tell dat sumfing is yours if it don't smell wike you? I mean, dis has gotta stop. Clean is a good fing, I realise, but dis is goin' ober da top.

Rilly.

------- by George

Posted by Our Warren at 11:41 AM EDT
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Monday, 4 April 2005
CommunnyKayShun
Mood:  bright
Now Playing: DikShunAiry (Continued)
Topic: Da Lore
Well, I hadda take a widdle break so I culd habba tawk wiffa udder bunnies inna Warren. I wanted to collect more werds an to make shure dat I habben't missed out on enny werds frumma beginin. Dis makin a DikShunAiry issa LOT harder den I thought it wuld be! Who knew dat we bunnies had so menny werds dat are unique toda Inkwish Language?

So ennyways, heer we go wif more werds...

I
identeefykayshun = recognizin who you are
impawtant = speshul, signiffygant, notable
inbenchon = a great idea sumbun thought up an made real.
indiggity = Belinda Bunny coined dis werd a long time ago. It means wiffoud dignity, not dignified.
Inkwish = comin frum Inkwand, which is pawt obba United Kingdom.
Inkwish Spot = a beyootiful kind of bunny, white wif black spots (or sumtimes, all black!) dat hassa LOT ob personality! Belinda Bunny wassa Inkwish Spot bunny an she hadda lotta 'pinions an commints to make aboud life an libbin assa Urban Rabbit.
inna = dis issa hard werd to describe, so I will use it inna sentance. Hey! Wook at dat! I just did!
innerestin = holds your 'tenshun
innu = opposit ob "out frum"
innypendant -ce = freedom
ishoo = topics ob discusshion.
issa = dis issa'nudder werd wike "inna". Try readin' da sentance out loud an you'll prob'ly geddit.
J
JUST-IN-CAD = Our Dadda's consultancy biznezz
justyfikayshun = habbin rite on your side
K
kitchin = berry impawtant room inna houz cos it's where da Big White Box wiffa food in is kept.
L
Lagomorph = correct genus for rabbits. We are NOT rodents! We are Lagomorphs!
leckted = when ebberybunny votes for you, you get 'leckted to a position.
lecktrick = power inna wall
lektrickal = sumfing dat werks by lektricks
liddle = small
lop = ears dat hang down
loppy = habbin lop or hangy-downy ears
lub -bly -bable/ -ing = care for da most inna whole werld an beyond.
luminiuminuminum = tin foil onna roll
M
Mawmie = sumbun who takes care ob you and teaches you to grow up an be 'Tellygint. I nebber hadda mawmie. I culdn't find her, ebben though I tried an tried. But I had Belinda Bunny who teached me, an Maman takes care ob me, an Missy-Bun is my lubly wife-bun.
mebbe = well, it could happin
menny = lots
mergency = urgent, inna hurry
miniLop = medium-size bunny wif short hangy-downy ears. "mini" doesn't mean datta bunny is small, just dat dey hab smaller ears.
missul = somefing you can fire off
mite = den again, it culd not happin, eidder
moor = not less
munny = papers dat hoomins exchange wif each udder to get fings we need. Hoomins fink it is berry impawtant. We don't.
N
nanners = long, yellow froot, berry tasty insides, wiffa nasty peel outsides.
nebber = not in dis lifetime.
nebbermind = don't werry abouddit.
nodis = seen sumfing forda furst time
nudder = not dis one but one ober dere
nummy = good to eat
O
ob = a partysipple meaning "frum" or "related to"
obba = ushually found wiffa werd "onna" (see below)
ober = go on top of, point in anudder direkshun; not heer, but ober dere.
odder = used in place ob udder
onna = ushually goes in frunt ob odder werds wike "account" so we can hab werds wike "onna'count obba fackt dat..."
OnAlone = Dis issa werd made up by Hunny. Bein' OnAlone issa werst fing dat can happin to a bunny. It means dat you are not pawt obba warren. Dere is nobunny whom you love, an nobunny to lub you; nobunny to care for you, an you don't care about ennybunny. Nobunny ebber wants to be OnAlone, not ebber. Dis is why ebberybunny who comes to Our Warren is nebber again OnAlone, but becomes pawt ob Our Warren.
onliest = all by itself, OnAlone; can also mean "unique" and/or special, too.
P
paw = your foot
pawtee = a sellybrashun wif good food, dancin', games an more good food
pinions = your own ideas
possytib = absolutly 100% shure
pra'ps = mebbe
pubwick = in society, not private
puter = machine that runs on lecktricks that we type on to communnykate wif each udder. Dis inbenchon has rebelooshunized rabbit society by gibbin us, who prebiously had no voice, a means ob beng heard around da werld.
pwoud = takin pride in sumfing, not ashamed
Q
questshun = sumfing you axt (can also be spelled "qwestshun", dependin onna bunny).
questriann = hoomins ridin on horses
questin = searchin' journey

And dat's alla werds I can type for tiday. I will add da rest obb'em tomorry.

--------By George

Posted by Our Warren at 12:52 PM EDT
Updated: Monday, 4 April 2005 1:19 PM EDT
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Tuesday, 29 March 2005
ComunnyKayShun
Mood:  d'oh
Now Playing: Lagomorphin to Inkwish an Back Again
Topic: Da Lore
Yeah.

I hab noticed that ebberyfing seems to come down to sumfing I learned frum Belinda Bunny: ComunnyKayShun.

Alla problems in Our Warren are problems in ComunnyKayShun:
1. The Collie-Dawg don't speak Cat.
2. The Catz don't speak Dawg.
3. The Catz don't speak Lagomorphin.
4. The Collie-Dawg don't speak Lagomorphin.
5. Niedder Maman or Dadda speaks Dawg, Cat or Lagomorphin, but they're tryin'.
6. The bunnies sorta speaks ebberyfing, incloodin Lagomorphin but we're not perfeckt yet.

Conseequently, nobun hassa cloo whut's bein' sed by ennybunny else around heer.

Now, Belinda stawted us all onna road to InnerSpecies ComunnyKayShun when she furst began dis Blog. It wassa Pioneerin' Effort on her pawt, because, as far as I know, she wass furst rabbit ennywheres to hab a Blog Ob Her Berry Own.

Axtchally, I fink it was Hunny who began dis effort to ComunnyKate wif udder species, an' he began it wif Our Warren, Alla Us Togedder.

Yeah, cos when Hunny wassa Young Bun, he was dribben byda need to help udders.

When Maman anna Reverend Doktor V'Ginny Sheay wanted to send a plush bunny to some sik children, Hunny hopped up onna 'puter, an figgered out howta press da keys an howta moob da mouse, an wif Maggie an Belinda, howta use da letters onna keyboard to make Inkwish werds dat sounded wike da werds hoomins use.

These bunnies developed da furst Translations frum Lagomorphin to Inkwish. An inna process, dey made a whole noo Language wif its own werds.

So I bin finkin dat dere shuld be a DikShunAiry ob Terms frum Lagomorphin to Inkwish an Back Again so dat we can all bedder unnerstand each udder.

Dis inbolbed sum research, cos I don't fink ennybunny has ebber created an OnWine DikShunAry ob Terms, aldoh I known ob anudder DikShunAry dat Exists (it issa Memebers Onwy kinda fing, an you hab to be pawta da Rebolooshunary Rabbit-friendly Gwoop, PetBunny, to hab akcess to it.), dis mite be da furst freely available DikShunAiry ob It's Kind.

So if we mess dis up, you're gonna hab to hab patience while we get it fixed up.

So Heer Goes:

Lagomorphin ... Inkwish ...
A
aboud = around, sort ob atta same time.
adbice = good werds frum old bunnies dat young buns need to hear.
afta = behind da furst one
aircondishywasher = fing dat goes inna winders to cool da air dat is comin' in inna hot Summertime.
Akrobatical = berry athletic an skillful
aktib = a bunny takin akshun
akshun = doin' stuff
Aktybist = an Aktib or outspoken bunny; most Inkwish Spot bunnies like Belinda.
alla = ebberybun
alotta = whole bunches ob/many
anudder = not dis one but one ober dere.
appuls = large, round, sweet, juicy treats. The dried twigs are good to chew on, too!
artykul = a partikular fing
atta = right den, dat time.
axt/-ed -ing = ask -ed -ing/as in "questshun"
B
becos = because
bedda = used wif "den" to compare fings.
bedded = used wif "em" to put innu bed wif sumfing else, wike a "bedded repawter" inna war.
behabe = not bein' bad; bein' good.
Bemember /-ing /-ed = callin' to mind.
berry = 1. Round, tasty froots. 2. dis exact one. 3. used as an intensyfyer to make anudder werd stronger.
bifore = not afta
binky = specialized akrobatik leap dat bunnies do.
birf = gettin' borned, comin' alibe.
buk = papers put togedder between cobbers wif typin in. You can learn frum'em or digest dem.
BUNNY = Lagomorphs (US!)
butta = slimy good stuff spread on bread.
C
Catz = furry four-foots obba Feline species. Can be danger'rus!, but mostly dey are stoopit an selfish. Dey come in Chowdas.
confoozled = not at all shure whut's goin' on.
cos = onna'kount ob
culd = past tense ob "can" (nodda tin type).
cubbers = fings to put ober yourself
( In Lagnomorphin, da ledder "c" makes a sound wike da ledder "k" in Inkwish. Just so you know why dere aren't more werds beginnin' wif "c".)
D
da = Definnytib Artykul meaning dis berry wun.
Dadda Our Hoomin buck, sorta. Finks he'ssa Top Bun, but he's rilly a fooder.
dat = not dis fing, but da udder one.
Dawg = furry four-foots obba Kaynine species dat tawk in "woofs" an "snuffles". Can be danger'rus to bunnies. Do Not Ebber be OnAlone wif dem!
deddykayshun = stayin da course wif courage.
dem = not us.
den = not now; whut happins nextest.
dere = dat way/not heer.
DikShunAiry = buk wiffa list ob werds an whut dey mean innit.
dis = da fing dat is in frunt ob you/not dat wun.
discrimmynashun = favourin' one ober anudder. You shuldn't do dis. It's not nice.
dissypline = doin fings ober an ober till you ged it rite.
dopted = happiest day ob your life, when you are no longer OnAlone, but taken innu a Warren.
downnastairs = floor below da one you are libbin' on.
E
enuf = whut you need ob stuff.
eny = not a specifik bunny, just enybunny.
ennyways = linking werd inna sentence.
ebbry = alla us togedder.
ebberybun = alla bunnies togedder.
F
feets = whut you hop on.
fing = one ob sum udders
fink /-ed /-ing = whut you do in your hed.
firteen = whut comes afta twelbe.
foots = more den one feets.
fortyget/-got/-getted = not bememberin'
free = whut comes afta two.
froot = tasty fings wif seeds; good pawt obba good diet; can be treats wike appuls, raisins or gwapes; mite hab too much shuga, but good for you ennyways.
frum = udder side ob "to"
frunt = not da back
fud = dis issa Feline werd for "food"; stuff dat catz eat. Bunnies don't use dis werd normally.
furst = at da hed obba line
G
gardin = 1. Where fings to eat grow 2. Makin shure nobun inbades da Warren; keepin' watch. 3. Protecktin.
ged/-got /-gotted = to hab it an hang on to it.
gonna = whut's comin'
Got'cha Day = da day when you was 'dopted.
gwapes = small, round, juicy tweats. When dees are dried, dey become raisins an still are berry good.
H
hab /-bin /bent = 1. holdin on to sumfing. 2. When Belinda used it in "Can't be habbin wif dis" she meant, "You bedder stop dis or you're gonna be in trubble."
haddit = can't take no more.
Hagonnasekund = waid-a-minit
happinin' = goin' on
Hay = 1. An impawtant pawt obba good diet. Bunnies shuld eat alotta hay alla time.
hed = da fing dat is holdin' up your ears.
Hey! = Oftin confoozled wif "hay"; werd yelled to ged 'tenshun.
Hokay = all rite.
Holdit! = Stop-dat-rite-now!
Howcome? = means da same as "Why?"

An dat's preddy much alla werds dat I can put inna dikshunary today.

Dis is much harder werk den I thought it wuld be. A wot longer, too.
Hokay. So. Ennyways...

I fink I'm gonna take Hunny's adbice: "Hab sum hay, an habba nap." Yeah. Good adbice cos I am one tiredly bunny!

-------- By George

Posted by Our Warren at 12:50 PM EST
Updated: Monday, 4 April 2005 1:03 PM EDT
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Saturday, 26 March 2005
The Easter Bunny NoBunny Wanted
Mood:  happy
Now Playing: Da Hist'ry ob Our Warren - Willow, Part II
Topic: Da Lore

So heer issa rest obba story ob Willow, Da Easter Bunny NoBunny Wanted...

Wike I telled you yestidday, nobunny buyed Willow cos she was inna pet store, an she was sik, an she was kinda "strange" in dat she had dis, wike, blank wook aboud her, wike da lights were on, bud nobun was at home.

An she didn't know howta use da pootie-box, eidder.

It wasn't wike she wasn't cute. She was berry cute an' she was sweet-natchured an cuddly, wif her liddle grey face wiffa liddle white blaze onna nose, an her wide, sort ob vacant eyes. She ebben swayed a liddle when she sat still.

But none ob dat mattered to Maman or Phil-da-Lad, cos they just wanted to make sure dat she didn't become dinner for some snake or lizzerd atta Pet Shop.

Dat was rilly whut bothered Maman, datta Pet Shops who don't sell alla baby bunnies at Easter, feed da ones dat are left ober to snakes.

Ob course, if pet shops were to find out dat hoomins wouldn't gib dem munny for baby bunnies at Easter, den da stores wouldn't sell dem, an breeders wouldn't breed dem, an no baby bunnies would hab to die as snake food.

Imagine whut it is wike - your baby given away for snake food... put inna glass tank for a snake to notice, to chase, to kill and to eat.

Yeah. An dat is whut happens to baby bunnies dat are left ober afta Easter.

Nebber fortyged dat.

So Willow got taken home to Our Warren.

An Maman noticed dat her nose was stuffy. So she taked liddle Willow toda V-E-T's.

It is hard to find a good bunny V-E-T. Most v-e-t's know alla 'boud dogs an cats, bud know berry liddle aboud bunnies. Maman went to one v-e-t who said, "Whoo boy, I'm gonna habba ged out my textbuks for dis one! I habbin't seed a rabbit since Vet School!"

Well, Maman was outta dere wiffa bunny in one big hurry.

So she had found whut she called a "Reasonable" v-e-t who wasn't werld's greatest, but he was hokay, an dat's where she taked Willow.

So da V-E-T looked Willow ober and gabe her sum Baytril an Willow's snuffly nose cleared up.

Just long enuf for Maman to inny'duce her to Belinda.

An afta that, the sniffles came back.

So Willow was sort obba weird rabbit, berry calm an complaysint (means "gentle") but berry hungree (she eated ebberyfing dere wasta eat) an she did rilly big pooties all ober ebberywheres, axtcept inna pootie-box.

An Belinda didn't care.

But Maman did.

So Maman buyed a Pootie-sucker.

Now a Pootie-Sucker issa "masheen". It's big, has wheels, anna hose-nose (kinda wike a collie-dawg nose, but longer an more mobile) dat can suck up pooties faster den ennybunny can fire dem out. It also makes a wotta noise!

So Maman an Phil-da-Lad buyed one ob des Fings an bringed it home to Our Warren.

Hunny sed it was just aboud da werst fing he'd ebber seed. It was terribly, terriby noisy! Anna hose wuld chase you around, trying to suck pooties right outta your butt! You no sooner did one, den heer comed dat Pootie-Sucker in behind you an gobbled dem up. It was an awful fing to hab inna Warren, an ebberybun was skert obbit.

'Cept Willow.

As Belinda sed, Willow was too dumb to be skert ob ennyfing.

So one day, Phil-da-Lad was onna udder end obba Pootie-Sucker, an he was cleanin outta habbytats.

Well, Hunny, egged on by Maggie (as was ushually da case), lunged atta hose-nose onna Pootie-Sucker, an Heatherington, who wassa Dutch (an dey don't take no crap frum ennywun), boxed it an growled.

But Phil-da-Lad was preddy determined, speshully cos Maman had sed dat he was not goin ennywhere's until alla pooties was sucked, an dat wassa bottom-line.

So he moobed up to Belinda an Willow's habbytat an stawted to run da Pootie-Sucker aroun' in dere.

Well, Belinda was smawt enuf to moob right to da back ob her habbytat as soon as she seed it comin', but Willow just stood dere, watchin'.

An Belinda shouted out, "MOOB WILLOW!"

But Willow just blinked an sorta swayed back an forth on her feets.

So Belinda hollared again, "WILLOW! MOOB!"

An Willow just sat dere.

An Phil-da-Lad, who was oppyratin da Pootie-Sucker, said, "Willow, moob it!"

So Willow sat down, blinked an stretched out her neck towards Phil-da-Lad, wif her widdle nose goin' wike she wanted a pet, an bifore he knew whut was happinin, Willow....sniffed....da.....end....obbba... Pootie-Sucker!

Well...

You hab nebber seen ennyfing wike it!

Phil rite away starts screamin for Maman, cossa Pootie-Sucker is makin a whole new noise now that it's nose is clogged up wif Willow's nose stuck inside it. An Willow's eyes are buggin' out, an Phil's hollarin for Maman cos he can't get Willow unstuck an she's startin to deflate wike a shaggy balloon inna high-pressure chamber.

An doesn't Belinda just come boundin' up, all hextcited, cos dis is her bondmate that's doin da hextplodin, just as Maman comes flyin innu da kitchin where da buns had dere habbytats. An den it was preddy much a freeway struggle, wif Maman yellin an Phil yellin an Willow's eye gettin buggier and buggier an her geddin thinner an thinner while da Pootie-Sucker is whinin high.

So Maman finally hits da "Off" switch, anna Pootie-Sucker winds down.

An dere is silence.

Willow's nose falls outta da end obba Pootie-Sucker's hose an her eyes go back innu dere sockets.

An she takes a deep breath.

Suddenly her eyes get wide again.

It's a miracle! Forda furst time in her widdle life, Willow can breathe!

Belinda comes ober to Willow to see if she's allrite, an Willow snuffles her. An Belinda is, like, "Whutssamatta wif you?"

An Willow is wike, "I can smell you."

An Belinda is wike, "No joke. I been smellin you."

Den Willow lifts her nose innu da air an says, "I can smell Maman, an I can smell Phil-da-Lad! I can smell Maggie! An Hunny!"

An Belinda says, "Dat's nuffin, we can ALL smell Hunny. Frumma'boutta mile off."

An Hunny checks his butt an says, "Can not!"

But Willow goes on wike nobunny sed ennyfing, an s'claims, "An I can smell Heatherington, too!"

An Belinda snorts an says, "Anudder no-brainer."

Well, by dis time, Phil-da-Lad has taken da Pootie-Sucker apart, an sure enuf, rite inside da bag dere issa great, big, long string ob snot. An he shows it to Maman (it's a berry Phil-thing to do).

An Maman wooks at da snot-ball, an den wooks at Willow an shudders.

"No wonder she's snuffling ebberyfing," Says Maman. "Probably smelling things for the first time in her life!"

An so Willow wandered around forda rest obba day, snufflin ebberyfing an hextclaimin' ober all obbit, cos she had nebber smelled smells, an nebber realised datta werld hadda whole udder dimenshion.

An Maman stopped usin' da Pootie-Sucker so much afta dat, an went back to Mr Broom an Ms Mop. Cos sumtimes "Progress" issn't all it's cracked up to be, she says.

An Willow, who wassa Easter Bunny NoBunny Wanted, turned out to be very wanted at Our Warren, an libbed inna Warren for wong time, wif Belinda.

Which, as Hunny says, is rilly sumfing, when you consider to whom she was bonded.

An dat's summa da story ob Willow of Our Warren.

---------By George

Posted by Our Warren at 1:03 PM EST
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Friday, 25 March 2005
The Easter Bunny NoBunny Wanted
Mood:  happy
Now Playing: Da His'try ob Our Warren
Topic: Da Lore

When I furst came to Our Warren, I was small. I didn't know berry much (mainly onna'count ob arrivin' inna box frumma v-e-t's). An I hadda lotta energy, so I didn't wanna sleep much.

An Hunny was old, an he didn't sleep much, eidder.

So he wuld talk to me, an tell me whut he called "Da Lore".

"Da Lore" issa story aboud the Beginnings ob Our Warren. It issa His'try.

So I'm gonna tell summa it to you.

Back inna Beginnin', at Easter-time, dere was just Hunny an his bondmate Maggie, Heather an Belinda inna Warren. In fackt, Belinda had just come to Our Warren frum Ms Laura Warner's South Jersey Rabbit Rescue. Maman an Phil-da-Lad had gone down to ged Belinda to be a bondmate for Heather, 'cept dat when dey got back to da house, Heather decided dat he didn't need to be bossed around by an Inkwish Spot, an so Belinda was libbin by herself.

So dere was Hunny, a miniLop, who was bonded to Maggie who wassa Standard Rex. An den dere was Heatherington Rabbitm who wassa Dutchie boy, an Belinda who wassa Inkwish Spot who was each in dere own habbytat. An dere was Maman an Phil-da-Lad

An dat was Our Warren.

So.

Maman an Phil hadda Pellet 'Mergency (which means they were outta pellets). So they stopped by a pet store where they didn't ushally go, anna store had baby bunnies for sale.

There were four widdle bunnies, alla dem liddle loppy bunnies. But dere was one, dat wassa widdle bigger den da udders, one sittin' a liddle ways off by itself.

So Maman knew right off dat it was dif'frunt. An Maman allus is sort ob drawn to dose bunnies dat are dif'frunt.

So da liddle grey an white loppy-eared bunny was dere inna cage by herelf. An she sat berry quiet an still.

Bud Maman an Phil-the-Lad alreddy had four bunnies an didn't know how dey culd afford to feed an extry mouf.

But wike Maman says, "If God sends us an extry mouf, He will send us a way to feed it."

An Maman sed to the owner obba store, "Let me know if dat grey an' white bunny gets sold." An she gibbed him some brooshures frumma House Rabbit Society to gib to ennyone who buyed a bunny, so at least dey would know a widdle bit aboud habbin' an Indoor Urban Rabbit.

So Easter came an went, an da udder bunnies found homes wif udder hoomins, an alla brooshures were handed out, but no hoomins wanted to take da widdle grey and white loppy bunny home wif dem.

Maman an Phil-da-Lad camed innu da pet store ebbery week, an still da grey an' white loppy bunny was dere. So Maman went innu where da bunny was an piked da bunny up an cuddled her. Anna widdle bunny was so sad, dat she cuddled up to Maman an sighed.

So da store manager came up to Maman an sed,

"No one seems to want this rabbit. There's something the matter with her. I don't think she's quite all right."

An Maman looked at him, an arched one eyebrow at him wike she does when she's aboud to get 'noyed, an sed,

"I beg your pardon?"

Anna Manager sed, "Well, I think she's dumb or something. She won't use a litterbox, she won't even pick one corner of her cage to go in. She just goes anywhere."

An Maman sed, "It because she's not in a home setting."

Den da Manager sed, "I can't keep her."

An Maman anna Manager stared at each udder. An finally Maman sed,

"How much?"

Anna Manager began wif whut Maman calls "A Story". He started at some figger Maman wassn't gonna accept an went down till he arrived atta figger dey bof could "Lib Wif".

So Maman an Phil-da-Lad brought da liddle grey an shite loppy girl home to Our Warren.

An dey named her "Willow", onna'count ob she was so gentle an sweet.

An Maman taked da widdle bunny toda V-E-T for a well-bunny check-up, anna widdle bunny was sik. She hadda pneumonia an hadda take two weeks ob Baytril.

So when dat was ober, Maman decided dat mebber Willow would like to lib wif Belinda.

So Maman, who didn't know a fing aboud bonding bunnies, (cos Maggie an Hunny had bonded demselbes) just decided she wuld leeb da doors to their habbytats opin an she an Phil-da-Lad wuld stand by in case ob 'Mergencies.

So Maman opined da doors. Phil-da-Lad hadda dust-pan anna wisk-broom an oven mitts. Maman piked uppa towel.

Belinda came snufflin' forward an den stopped just bifore she crossed innu Willow's habbytat. She wooked at Willow an Willow wooked at her. Den Belinda came innu Willow's habbytat an wooked at alla Willow's stuff, an ate summa Willow's food. An Willow just wooked. So Belinda walked up to Willow an licked her nose.

Willow blinked, an shifted back an forth on her feets, an then sat down.

Den Belinda wooked at Maman standin' dere wiffa towel, an at Phil-da-Lad wif his oven-mits an dust-pan an wisk-broom, an she shook her hed.

An she moobed innu Willow's habbytat an dat was preddy much dat.

Willow was a member ob Our Warren.

An den came Phil-da-Lad anna pootie-sucker, an Willow got her nose caught an all da drama - but dat's for tomorrow...

-------By George

Posted by Our Warren at 9:06 PM EST
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Thursday, 24 March 2005
Whoa! I'm Late!
Mood:  rushed
Now Playing: Not right....
Topic: Libbin Assa Urban Rabbit

You know we hadda moob house an how we're all heer, tryin to gedda noo warren goin' inna noo houz?

Well, it isn't goin' so good.

Da Dawg is still herdin' catz anna Catz is still protestin to Dadda alla time an Maman still just don't ged it.

Of course, we all gots noo apawtmints, too, which has called for sertin adjustmints, too.

An on toppa alla that, there is sumfing wrong with da mechanism dat werks "Spring" cos da wedder is COLD! An DARK! An an awful lot like WINTER.

I think somefing is stuck somewheres.

Dadda says his knees are stuck.

Dadda also says that da Dawg is stuck on 'noyance, as areda Catz.

Well, da way I figger it, da Catz hab allus been stuck on 'noyance.

Dey know dey are not 'lowed inna Bun Room, but they manage to sneak in, don't they? Just as soon as Maman opins da gate acrosst our doorway, dey appears just by magic an slinks in rite behind her. Anna fing is, dey know dey aren't 'lowed in, cos as soon as Maman says dere name, dey scoot rite out, but ebben doh dey know, dey still sneaks.

Ob course, when dey are sneakin, da Dawg is sneakin' rite behind dem - only at his size, he don't sneak too good. Cos he is sneakin' cos dey are sneakin' and he's sneakin' so he can keep an eye on dem an repawt dem to Maman just in case she don't see dem. But she does, cos it's rilly hard to miss forty pounds of cat whedder it's sneakin or not.

Den Maman yells atta dawg, too - an den we hab dis log-jam inna doorway: one dawg that is tryin' to back up wiffoud taking his eyes offa cat, an one cat tryin to go forward wiffoud runnin innu da dawg and one Maman tryin to ged to her coffee fru alla mess ob cats anna dawg.

Yeah.

Well, you kin see how complykated life is gettin' aroun heer.

An on top ob ebberyfing else, it's cold and damp an Dadda says that the garden is squidgy. Dis means that when the dawg comes in frum outside, his paws are all muddy and he leebs tracks on Maman's clean floor. So Dadda makes him stop and den Dadda wipes da Dawg-feets with a towel, which gets all muddy an hasta go innu da washing machine, which makes laundry.

Maman wants to know which is worser - habbin to mop da floor or habbin to do alla laundry frumma dawg.

And then she moobed Missy an my pootie box. Well dat wassn't nice. I liked where it was bifore, I think, although I was sort of peeing there ober the side atta dawg oncet inna while. An' I s'spose that I did manage to hit the floor now an then. But now that she's put a pootie-box there, well, I hab bin aimin' ober the side more oftin.

An' Maman sed my aim is bad.

Well, it's her fault cos she shouldn't be moobin pootie boxes.

Missy has added pooties to my puddle onna floor. An Maman don't like dat, eidder.

So I told her aboudda pootie-box by draggin it innu da middle obba apawtmint, but she didn't ged the idea an moobed it back innu dat corner where I don't wanna hab it.

I figger it's Missy an my apawtmint, so we can habba pootie-box where we want. Maman has two pootie-boxes in heer, so I fink we can moob at least one obb'em.

An now da grapes we was geddin are gone. Da Dawg had summa dem, an Dadda had sum and now they are gone.

We're back to raisins.

The good news issat they are the BIG raisins inna red box an not the cheap widdle ones wiffa store name on.

Mebbe we will ged appuls, cos I can see dem still inna Big White Box when Maman opins it.

So we're still all messed up heer, wif Catz anna dawg an alla stuff goin' on. It was nebber wike dis when Hunny was Top Bun. An it wassn't wike dis when Belinda was in charge, eidder. I must be doin' sumfing wrong.

Hunny sed dat when I am not sure aboud fings, I should hab sum hay an habba nap an fink. So I shall. He was rite aboud most fings... chances are, he's rite about dis.

I'll let'cha know...

-------- By George

Posted by Our Warren at 7:32 PM EST
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Wednesday, 23 March 2005
Confessions of an Easter Bunny
Mood:  blue
Now Playing: Don't Give Bunnies For Easter
Topic: The Next Generation


Hullo. My name is George and I amma Easter Bunny.

That's right. I came innu this werld assa Easter Bunny - an ancient symbol of Spring, ob new life, of regeneration, of rebirth an' Hope Inna Future.

At least, that's whut Maman says. She knows aboud these things, about hist'ry an berry old stuff dat nobunny else seems to care aboud. She says Easter is alla'boud rebirth an Hope Inna Future, but that most hoomins hab fortygotten whut Easter rilly is an' make believe dat it is aboud candy an coloured eggs an buyin bunnies inna pet store.

An' den she gets sad an says, "George, you usta be an Easter Bunny."

But I rilly don't bemember much aboud being an Easter Bunny, 'cept dat it was no fun. Bein' an Easter Bunny had nuffin to do wif candy, an nuffin to do wif gettin' borned, an nuffin to do wif' habbin enny kind ob Hope at all.

Here is whut I bemeber aboud bein' da Easter Bunny:
I was berry small.
I got picked uppa'lot.
I was squeezed.
I got fed lettuce.
It made my tummy hurt.
I libbed in a small cage wif some food an wadder. An' ebberybunny seemed to wike me at furst, but preddy soon, dey fortygot aboud me. I guess da "Noo" wore off. Or mebbe I wasn't cute ennymore. Or mebbe I was just inna way.

Cos, you see, I dunno why nobunny wanted me. I wassa Easter Bunny, wasn't I? You know, da Peter Cottontail, Hoppin Down Da Bunny Trail!

Yeah, dere is ebben a song written aboud Easter Bunnies like me. You hear dat song played a lot rite around now.

And it's kinda hard to unnerstand how you can be all lubbed an' wanted one day an then shoved innu a small cage an' become a "chore" the next. I mean, I can't help bein' alive an havin to eat an habbin to go sit inna pootie-box now an' then an all. That's whut bunnies do. An' I can't help it if when all I have issa small cage, all I do is sit. There's not much room for ennyfing else, is there?

So howecome I got shoved innu a box an then left atta V-E-T's office?

Issat whut happins toda Easter Bunny?

Cos dat's whut happined to me.

Yeah.

Sumbun putted me innu a box an dribed me inna car toda V-E-T's office. Dey put me down an den left.

An' dere I was. All by myself.

An' I was three months old.

OnAlone.

Now, OnAlone is the most Awfullest Thing that can happin to a bunny. Bunnies are susposed to lib in Warrens wiffa wotta udder bunnies. If you're a bunny, you get borned, an you habba Mawmie, an you learn frumma udder bunnies an get 'Tellygint, an grow up to be a Top Bun. An' den you hab kits ob your own dat you teach to be 'Tellygint along wif alla udder kits, so dat you love, an' are loved in return.

But bein' OnAlone means dat nobunny loves an cares for you an you don't love or care for nobunny. You have no Warren to be in. You are not part ob sumfing bigger, you don't belong and you are sad an sorrowful an skert.

I know, becos I was OnAlone. An I was sad, an sorrowful an skert all by myself inna box inna V-E-T's office while my furst people drived away.

An' whut were dey finkin', leebin me dere? Dat da V-E-T wanted me? He didn't. He didn't want an extry rabbit. He issa doctor to care for sik bunnies, dawgs an ebben catz an make dem well again. He doesn't need to hab an extry well-bunny to feed.

I guess does furst people wanted me dead. Cos dat happins a lot at V-E-T's. Cos dere is no room for extry bunnies. No Warrens to take us in, no places for us to sleep, no udder bunnies to teach us, no critters to welcome us.

An' so we are sent off toda Rainbow Bridge by ourselves, to find our way inna darkness. Mebbe you don't see it, but afta ebbery Easter, dere is a crowd of berry liddle bunnies, all skert an' alone, wiffoud Mawmies, all OnAlone, an dey are runnin, an hidin' an wide-eyed an' terryfied - poor widdle lost souls dashing through the cold an' nighttime, not knowing where they are fleeing to unable to turn back and afraid to go forward. Behind dem is Terror, ahead lies Fear an so dey run for dere lives.

An' ahead ob them issa Bridge an' it is high an white shining against the darkness obba sky, like a thin strand of moonlight stretched across black velvet. An skert as they are, the tiny bunnies run toward it, becos it is the onliest place to run.

You can't know whut it's like. You can't imagine it, but I can. It is the nightmare born in every liddle bunny's waking dream as soon as a breeder-person takes us frum our Mawmies. We are OnAlone just as the Werld comes innu focus, an OnAlone inna pet stores winders, an OnAlone in tiny cages, OnAlone as some starve to death, or are hurted to death, or who are let go inna wilderness obba city park wif predators wiffa nightmares obba silver moonlight Bridge stretched acrosst da Void anna cries ob tiny bunies ringing in our ears.

An' I had those nightmares, too, until I managed to get heer. When I finally got heer, I met Hunny, an Poet, an 'speshully Belinda, an they all told me dat da Bridge is notta nightmare, dat onna udderside ob it there issa Meadow wif alla bunnies who hab ebber libbed, all playin' inna sun. An' Hunny sed dat The Bridge issa place where old buns go to feel young, an' where sik buns go to get well.

But if I hadn't been rescued, you see, I nebber would have knowed dis. I nebber wuld hab had enny teachers, nebber wuld hab had friends an rewayshuns, an no Maman or Dadda. I wuld nebber hab learned dat da Bridge wassa good place, an dat it is pawt obba Cyrkil ob Life, an dat I don't hab to be afraid ebber again.

Becos I was rescued.

Maman came an took me away inna box an brought me to Our Warren, where I'm notta Easter Bunny enny more. I am George, George ob Our Warren.

So, you see, dere shuld be no more Easter Bunnies wike me. No bunnies shuld be sold as "presents". Dere are udder fings dat make presents at Easter Time, an' heer issa pickhure ob my friend, Clementine (he libs in Texas) wif some ob the GOODgifts to gib at Easter.

So, go ahead an gib candy for Easter, an gib sombun a plush, stuffed bunny toy for Easter, but please, please, please don't buy a living bunny as a toy.

We are not toys.
We are like you -
Living, breathing Memebers of God's Great Warren,
Alla Us Togedder, NoBunny OnAlone.


------ By George

Posted by Our Warren at 11:41 AM EST
Updated: Wednesday, 23 March 2005 11:52 AM EST
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Tuesday, 22 March 2005
Dawg Houz Roolz
Mood:  surprised
Now Playing: Da Fairy Wog-Dawg, Fat-Cat an Me, George
Topic: Libbin Assa Urban Rabbit

Da Dwag has Roolz.

Does he ebber!

An' we're not tawkin' just a few gen'ral commints on behaviour heer, lemme tell you. We're tawkin' a whole, entire Buk ob Roolz that he has written all by himself, wiffoud enny help frum ennybunny.

Who knew?

An what's more, he ekpects dat ebberybunny inna whole houz is gonna lib by his Roolz, too, since we are all part ob his Pack.

So he finks.

Yeah.

Alla Us Togedder inna Warren were treated to an all-out demmystrashun aboudda Dawg's Roolz fing wast nite.

Dadda happened to go out toda Lodge. Now Lodge issa berry big fing in dis houz, going back for hunnerts ob years inna family. Maman says she is her Father's Daughter an if ennybunny believes Dan Brown's fikshunal stories, they are dumb - an' she can proob it - cos she is whut he issn't, which issa trained 'storian.

Mind you, da Dawg has been trained, too, bud I don't know in whut.

So ennyway, Dadda went to Lodge an Maman stayed home.

Now just as Dadda was leebin, he sed toda Border Collie Dawg, "Be a good Fairy Wog-Dawg an take care ob Maman anna houz. Guard, Marc. Guard."

(Fairy Wog-Dwag is Dadda's name forda Border Collie. No one knows why, least ob all da Border Collie who notta deep finker.)

An Dadda left.

Well, da Fairy Wog-Dawg says Dadda is da Alpha Male obba Pack, an he (Fairy Wog-Dawg) issa Sekondary Male, which makes him in charge whenna Alpha Male is absent, an this is speshully troo if da Alpha Male (which is Dadda) gibs him (which is da Fairy Wog-Dawg) da command, "Guard".

So when Dadda says "Guard" toda Fairy Wog-Dawg, it means datta Dawg is in charge ob ebberyfing.

So he finks.

So Maman was inna Sittin' Room, sittin' wif her buk.

Anna Fairy Wog-Dawn goes in an sits wif her.

An just aboud den, da Fat-Cat waddles downnastairs to see whut's happinin', cos he herd da frunt door slam an da car stawt an nobunny had told him nuffin aboud it.

An just as da Fat-Cat got fru da Libbin Room an innu da Dinin' Room, da Fairy Wog-Dawg gets up frumma Sittin Room an shoots downnahall to stop da Fat-Cat frum goin' enny furder.

Anna Dawg is wike, "Hey, Cat! Stop!"

Anna Fat-Cat is wike, "Hey, Dawg! Pak it in!" an keeps on waddlin', innu da Kitchin to habba wook atta Fairy Wog-Dawg's dinner an wadder bowls.

Anna Dawg is wike, "Hey, Cat! What'cha doin'?"

Anna Cat is wike, "Wookin to see if dere is enny food weft."

Anna Dawg says, "Wook in your own bowl. Dat's da Roolz: ebberybunny has dere own bowl. Now ged outta mine."

Anna Cat wooks atta Dawg an sits down an says, "Who died an weft you in charge?"

"I amma Sekondary Male!" says da Dawg, wike it means sumpfing.

So da Cat geds up, shakes an says, "An I'm da Top Cat. So ged outta da way."

Anna Dawg is wike, "Hey, Cat! I told you to stop!", an runs around to stand between da Fat-Cat an his bowls.

Anna Fat-Cat just shrugs an goes arounna Dawg.

Soda Fairy Wog-Dawg goes arounna Fat-Cat an bumps innu da cabinets unner da sink.

An I'm watchin frumma Bun Room which is just offa Kitchin.

So Maman heers da Fairy Wog-Dawg bump innu da cabinets unner da sink, an she calls out, "Whutsamatta, Marc?"

An Marc (who issa Fairy Wog-Dawg) says, "Stay rite dere, Cat. Dat issa Alpha Female, Maman, calling. I gotta go, but I'm comin' rite back. So don't moob. Does are da Roolz."

Anna Fat-Cat is wike, "Whutebber."

Anna Fairy Wog-Dawg runned fru da Dinin' Room an downnahall to da Sittin' Room where Maman was still sittin wif her buk. An I hear Maman say to da Fairy Wog-Dawg:

"Marc, sit. Stay."

And dere issa *thump* assa Fairy Wog-Dawg sits down inna Sittin' Room. Cos Maman's da Alpha Female inna Wog-Dawg's Pack an he hasta do whut she tells him.

Soda Fat-Cat waddles acrosst da floor an climbs innu da pootie-box.

An frum da Sittin' Room, I hear da Fairy Wog-Dawg call out, "Hey, Cat! I thought I told you not to moob!"

Anna Fat-Cat don't answer, cos he is busy diggin aroun inna pootie-box, hoikin' fings out dat he finds in dere and flingin' dem on to da floor.

So I lean out an axt him, "Whut'cha doin, Cat?"

Anna Cat says, "Cleanin da pootie box. Cos it seems dat da Stoopit Cat finks she can use dis box an it's MY box. HER box is uppastairs inna udder Bafroom, an dis wun is MINE." Den he grins at me an adds, "It's da Roolz."

An I hear da Wog-Dawg yell frumma Sittin' Room, "I said 'Don't moob, Cat!'"

An da Fat-Cat turns his back on me an mumbles, "'Scuse me, but I gotta go."

An I'm wike, "Whatebber, Guy. But I know you been eatin' dat wet food stuff Dadda gabe you, so try to stay downwind ob us, hokay?" Cossa Fat-Cat can rilly stink uppa-place if da Hot-Air-Heater is blowin when he uses his litter-box.

Den alla sudden, I hear toenails, anna Fair Wog-Dawg comes shootin fru da Dinin Room an arounda corner obba Kitchin, hed down, legs crossin, eyes intent.

An alla bigger sudden, he's inna Fat-Cat's face.

"I told you not to moob!"

An da Cat is atta deli-kate pawt obba pootie-box manoovers, an he can't moob. So he's sittin' dere, in his pootie-box, hunched up, eyes crossed, an paws togedder, an he gasps atta Dawg,

"Do...you...MIND?"

Anna Fairy Wog-Dawg is bouncin up-an-down anna'long-side da Fat-Cat's pootie box, yellin', "I told you not to moob an you moobed! It's against the Roolz obba Pack for you to moob! An' you're goin' pottie inna houz! Not allowed! Against da Roolz! Against da Roolz! You're not houzbroken!"

Anna Fat-Cat is wike, "WILL you ged outta heer? *geez* Now I know how Dadda feels when he's inna bafroom wif you."

Anna Dawg is bouncin' up-an-down, an he's rilly goin' now, makin' peepin' noises.

"You're not houzbroken! You're doin' IT inna houz! Whutsamatter wif you? You're 'sposed to go Outside like a normal dawg!"

Anna Fat-Cat is wike, "I ain't no stoopit Dawg, you dumb Dawg!"

An he leans ober da side obba pootie-box an takes a swipe atta Fairy Wog-Dawg.

But he misses.

Cos he's still inna middle obba deli-kate pawt obba pootie-box manoovers, you see.

An suddenly, Mouse, who is nearer to da Fat-Cat's pootie-box place den I am, turns his back onna Fat-Cat, hunches up an says:

"Phaww. You stink, Cat."

Anna Fat-Cat, who isn't feelin too charmin atta momint, looks up at Mouse an snaps, "You ain't no rose yourself, you widdle hay-chompin' gas-bag."

Anna Fairy Wog-Dawg starts peepin' louder an bouncin' more an more nextest to da Fat-Cat's pootie-box.

"You can't talk toda Rabbits! Not on my watch, Cat!"

Anna Cat glares an gibs one big effort (cos he's all full of annoyed now an preddy much outta da udder stuff) an stawts to paw atta cabinet.

An da Fairy Wog-Dawg just aboud goes nuts.

"NO TOUCHING MY COOKIE-CABINET! God knows where your paws have been!"

An just den, I hear Maman inna Sittin' Room, an she's not best pleased:

"That does it! Do I hafta come out there? Whut's goin' on?"

Anna Dawg is so upset now dat he barks.

An heer comes Maman, in her bafrobe, wif her hair all ober an her finger in her buk. An she does not wook happy.

So she wooks atta Fairy Wog-Dawg. He wags his tail.
She wooks atta Fat-Cat in his pootie-box. He stops pawin' da cabinet an wooks back at her.
An she wooks innu da Bun Room, an dere is Mouse gibbin da Cat da Royal Bunny Butt, an me hanging half-way outta my apawtmint wif my ears all forwards.

An Maman says, "Allrite, whut's goin' on out heer?"

So da Fairy Wog-Dawg starts bouncin again.

"Da Fat-Cat is breakin' alla Roolz! He moobed when I told him to sit still, an I'm the sub-alpha Male Dadda left on-Guard by Dadda! Den he didn't axt to go outside wike a good dawg, an hadda "accident" in dat box dere! An den he took a swipe at me as I am doin' my job ob Guardin! An he tawked toda Rabbits, insulted dem! Den he pawed at MY Cookie Cabinet, wike it was his! An he stinked uppa Bunny Room! All ob it, against alla Roolz!"

Anna Fairy Wog-Dawg sat down on Maman's left side, an lifted his hed an tried to wook all noble.

But Maman wooked puzzled. "Does Mommy's good boy hafta go outside?"

Anna Dawg wooks up at her an says, "Whut?"

An Maman pats him onna hed an says, "Does a good puppy hafta go outside?"

An dere's dis silence dat settles ober da kitchen - like the kind of silence dat follows when alla lights go out, just bifore alla scweaming stawts.

So, I look ober at Mouse an see dat his shoulders are shakin. An den I wook atta Fat-Cat, an he's got these wide, innycent eyes on, but you can tell, he's laffin' onna inside wiffoud lettin it show too much onna outside.

Anna Fairy Wog-Dawg sorta whimpers an sinks down innu a puddle ob fur onna floor nextest to Maman.

An Maman walks past Cokie-da-Fat-Cat in his pootie-box, slides opin da Gate to da Bun Room an opins uppa Back Door. Den she calls da Fairy Wog-Dawg again:

"Come on, Good Boy, let's go outside!"

Anna Fiary Wog-Dawg, who can't refuse an Order frumma Alpha Female, no madder how stoopit it is, slinks past her an stands onna Back Steps and stands wookin' back ober his shoulder at her.

An frumma doorway, Maman says, "Go on, Markie, Mamma will wait right here for you."

Anna Fairy Wog-Dawg gibs a big sigh an trots down offa steps innu da Back Garden.

Den Maman gibs us each wunna da Gwapes dat she has inna Big White Box, an gibs da Fat-Cat wunna does Cat-treat-fings cos he's wookin all hopeful. Den she wets da Fairy Wog-Dawg back innu da houz an gibs him a cookie frum his cabinet behind da Cat's litter-box.

Anna Fat-Cat waddles off on his way fru da Dinin Room, an downnahall innu da Sittin Room where Maman has gone. Den da Dawg goes afta him, an I heer Maman again:

"No, Cokie. Cokie, ged offa buk. Cokie, down. Geddown. Get offa me, you fat lummox! No Marc, no. Leave the cat alone. Marc...Stoppit! Cokie - NO! Keep those paws to yourself! Marc, leave the cat a...Cokie, don't you dare bat at the dog...stoppit, you two...stoppit..."

An I'm finkin' how great it is to be a Rabbit...

-------- By George

Posted by Our Warren at 9:28 AM EST
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Monday, 21 March 2005
Mobile Homes
Mood:  energetic
Now Playing: Lookin' Up
Topic: The Next Generation

I fortygotted to tell aboudda new apawtmints we got.

Bemember dat we hadda Habbytats dat Dadda an Phil-da-Lad made for us bifore Phil-da-Lad signed up for da Naby?

Nedder do I.

When I came heer from da V-E-T's office where I was dumped afta Easter last year, da Habbytats was alreaddy inna Bun Room an Phil-da-Lad was just alreaddy finishin' up bein inna da Naby. I amma Noo Kid Onna Block as Belinda was allus tellin' me, an I didn't know ennyfing aboudda homes that weren't Habbytats.

Hokay, so lemme tell you aboudda Habbytats. Ready?

When Dadda comed frum Inkwand to marry Maman an lib wif Alla Us Togedder inna Warren, he an Phil-da-Lad hadda look atta Warren an decided that everybun needed noo places to lib. So Dadda, bein' an Engine-ear talked wif Hawthorn (who was bondmate to Belinda anna berry forward-thinking rabbit) aboud whut kinda place alla bunnies wuld like to live.

Furst they decided that there wuld be NO CAGES. Ebber.

Then they decided that whut bunnies rilly wanted wasta be pawt obba family, watch TeeBee, hab a room ob dere own, an to hab quarters dat was easy for Maman to clean where she didn't hab to bend ober alla time.

So, all werkin togedder, dey drawed plans for a noo type ob bunny home, called "Hawthorn's Homes", an put uppa web-site. Den Dadda an Phil-da-Lad got busy an built some ob dees homes for Our Warren.

Ob course Belinda an Hawthorn gotta biggest one. Dat's cos Belinda wassa Top Bun an a Inkwish Spot. You allus do whutta Inkwish Spot says. Belinda sed it's inna Roolz sumwhere but she wasn't sure where - not that it matters. Wif Belinda, it was better to just agree, wike Hawthorn did, an he was a berry forward-thinking rabbit.

So ennyway, Da Habbytats were like BIG-big pens for bunnies. They had hard floors we could walk on, an dey had white fences alla'round, wif nice pootie-boxes, toys, crocks dat screwed on through the fences for wadder an food an nice hay-bins. Maman culd stand up inn'em to sweep us out wif Mr Broom, an ebbery week, she culd wash our floors wif Mr Mop. So we stayed nice an clean an' had wots ob room for extersize an sleepin' an ebberyfing. An ebbery nite, Belinda came to tuck us all in.

An ebberyfing was fine.

'Til I came along.

Maman sed dat nobunny had chewed onna habbytats til me.

An I sed dat I only wanted to go see Missy an dat's why I was Makin' A Hole - which I thought was a preddy good idea atta time.

An' Missy thought so, too.

But Maman, didn't think so, specially when we moobed innu da Noo Houz an stawted Makin' A Hole just cos we culd.

So Maman an Dadda went toda Robert's Shop where dey buy us food an hay an dey saw these noo Rabbitats. So dey ordered 3 obb'em - one for Mr Mouse, an two bigger ones, one for Clover an Beebe-Bunny!! an' one for Missy 'n' me.

Well, the Rabbitats arrived an weren't dey just sumfing else?

In my whole life, I hab nebber bin as tall assa dawg. Nebber.
But you put me in da Noo Rabbitat Apawtmint an I'm on eye-lebbel wiffa bugger.

Yup, no more dealin' wif catz or dawgs frum "one fut offa ground" as Belinda usta say. I'm goin eye-to-eye, an toe-to-toe wiff'em now. Dat big, ol' nose come innu da apawtmint an I can snuffle it rite back. I ebben licked it!

Wanna see a s'sprised dawg? See one that's had it's nose licked by a bun.

Wanna see a ebben more s'sprised dawg? See one that's taken a direct pee frum Mouse.

Wanna see a cat make a run for it? Watch one hafta stand on it's back paws to gedda wook-in atta bun wiffa attytude on, like Beebe. Yup, I nebber seed a cat moob so fast!

Yeah, we're tuffer now dat we is taller.

An we're geddin more treats, too.

Cos wif bein' taller, we is more onna eye-to-eye lebbel wif Dadda when he's inna Big White Box wookin' for fings to eat. He bends ober an' dere we are - five pairs ob eyes wif one thought: "Feed us. We are cute."

Mind control is a great thing.

An these noo apwatmints are on wheels. Dis means dat Maman can wheel Mr Mouse into da Sittin' Room to sit an watch "Lawn Order" when he hears da song for it an stawts throwin' toys. An' habbin wheels means dat we can be moobed aroun' inna Bun Room, an ebben moobed out onto the Screen Porch on rilly nice days.

Missy an me can be rolled innu a sunbeam for a snooze wifoud moobin a paw!

Anna pootie-pans are spotless, cos Maman don't habba bend ober to pick dem up. Ob course, dey are onna small side, cos big ones won't fit through the opinin', so Missy hasta back innu'em to use 'em, but, well, as she sed, it's a small sackrifice when you fink aboud how nice an clean ebberyfing stays. We only use one, though, an keep the udder one to put hay in cos Maman can't find our haybins since we moobed frumma Old Houz. Ob course, she can't find a lotta fings since we moobed, but that's Maman for you, a genuine Looker-For-Fings if dere ebber was one.

So we're makin' out preddy good dees days. We gotta noo apartmints, an we're doin' preddy well on the treat front. We gots our own speshul room wif lots ob nice windows dat's decorated wif stained-glass pickchurs ob alla bunnies who hab ebber libbed in Our Warren, an wots ob sunshine. So I still gots Hunny an Belinda watchin ober me, an helpin me to grow 'Tellygint an all.

Course we still gotta Catz, but at least we're taller den dey are, an we're da same size assa Dawg, so dere are positive fings happinin', too.

And it seems Spring rilly is sprung.

Belinda usta say, "When you are one fut offa ground, allus look up." when I wassa youngbun, an I didn't quite know whut she meant. So I axted Hunny, "Whut's 'up', ennyways?"

An Hunny chewed on sum hay for a minit an sed, "UP is where you look. So look dere."

So dat's whut I'm doin' - lookin up and geddin dere!

------- By George

Posted by Our Warren at 11:58 AM EST
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Sunday, 20 March 2005
Food of Choice
Mood:  celebratory
Now Playing: Do a Little Dance!
Topic: Libbin Assa Urban Rabbit

Do a widdle dance...ged a widdle treat...do anudder widdle dance...gedda'nudder widdle treat...

Do you know you can rilly, seiously upsetta dawg just by doin' dat?

Oh yeah!

You can also seriously piss offa cat da same way, lemme tell you!

Do a widdle dance...be a cute widdle George...ged a widdle treat...do anudder widdle dance...gedda'nudder widdle treat...

An do you know datta Big White Box inna room heer wif us is just FULL ob treats?

Yeah. Maman an Dadda went toda Mawket.

Dey bought a bag ob appuls.
Dey bought a bag ob gwapes.
Dey bought a tub ob raisins.
Dey bought a bag ob carrots.
Dey bought a hunnert bags ob veggies...

Well, hokay, notta hunnert but it wooks wike it.

Anna catz anna Dawg got - (oh my, dis is too good) - Dey got cans!

Now issn't dat too bad?

Anna Dawg gotta box ob Dawg cookies anna catz gotta one widdle bag ob yucky-smellin' cat-treats (onna'count obba fackt dat dey are BOF too fat!).

But as ushual, da Bunnies made out wike bandits.

Oh yeah...do a widdle dance...gedda widdle treat...

Now da Dawg can't dance. He can do a wotta udder stuff, wike guard da basemint steps soda catz can't follow Dadda down dere, an' he can herd da catz outta da Bun Room; an' he can fetch a ball an' pick up dropped stuff an' gib it back an' tell who is atta door whenna bell rings, an' tell Maman datta phone is ringin' (wike she don't know? geez!) An' he can moob Maman downnastreet an stop atta crossing places, an go visitin' at places, an gib you his paw, an' sit, stay, lie down, an' alla dat Doggie Stuff, but he can't dance...

...so he don't ged alla treats wike I do.

He gets treats for goin' out inna yard at nite an for "breakfasts" inna mornin'.

But all I gotta do is dance, dance, dance!

Anna catz, bein' catz, don't do ennyfing, cept sit aroun' an wail dat dey aren't geddin' stuff.

So dey get treats mainly to shut dem up.

An all I gotta do is Dance!

Yeah.

An' you'll notice who gets alla good stuff - da Bunnies.

We ebben gotta whole bale ob hay out onna porch, anna Big Bag ob pellets, inn'adishon to alla that stuff dat comes frumma mawkit inna Big White Box.

Who makes Maman laff?
Da Bunnies!
Who makes Maman smile?
Da Bunnies!
Who gets alla good stuff?
Da Bunnies!
Who issa most impawtant inna houz?
Da Bunnies! (You bedder belieb it!)

An' all we godda do is dance, dance, dance!

An I am a good dancer, too! I can cirkul left an' I can cirkul rite, an' I can stand on my tippy-toes an waggle my ears atta same time! Oh yeah!

Watch me now!

Dance, dance, dance...gedda widdle treat...do a'nudder widdle dance...gedda'nudder widdle treat...

An all Missy has gotta do issa ear-lift now an den an' she gets a widdle treat, too. Den Clover will shuffle ober an do a widdle hop-stretch-hop, an' she gets a treat! An' whenna Beeb doesn't bite, he gets a treat, an Mouse gets one just so he don't feel left out!

Do we hab a racket goin' on heer or whut?

Yeah... I enjoy bein' a...*hop-binky-slide*...BUN!

Posted by Our Warren at 1:05 PM EST
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Saturday, 19 March 2005
Just Another Day In Paradise
Mood:  happy
Now Playing: We Are Family
Topic: The Next Generation
Well, it's still goin' on.

We moobed, but it's still not cleer 'zactly whut dis is ennymore.

You wuld fink dat afta habbin libbed through the Furst Generation ob Our Warren, da Dawg anna Catz wuld unnerstand alla'boud libbin wif House Bunnies. But no, ebberyfing is still all confusion an consternashun.

Da collie Dawg says we're pawt ob his Pack. You wanna seeda Dawg? Heer is his pickchur.

Da catz say we are pawt ob dere Chowder.

We bunnies say dey are Alla Us Togedder pawt ob Our Warren.

Anna Dawg says he issa Top Dawg inna Pack.
An Cokie-da-Fat-Cat says he issa Top Cat inna Chowder.

An I, George, amma Top Bun inna Warren, but dat is only if Mouse an Beeb bof agree, which is not alla time (onna count ob us habbin dees pee-wars now an den dat seems to bodder Maman. She says we are "Stinky Boyz" an den she geds outta mega-stinky Swiffer thingie dat Phil-da-Lad gots for her. An' she says WE stink!).

Heer issa pickchur ob me:

Bud ennyway... dere seem to be way too menny fings to belong to an too menny "Top" dis an dats.

And just to complykate fings furder, Maman an Dadda are in the whole mix, an mostly wiffoud knowin' aboud it which is Hoomins all ober. They ushally don't realise much until it hits 'em ober da hed like a tonne ob bricks.

You see, frumma Dawg's point-ob-view, Dadda is rilly the Top Dog inna Pack, which makes him whut is called, "Da Alpha Male". So, inna Dawg's view, dat makes Maman da "Alpha Female".

Conseequently, our Collie Dawg sees himself assa "Number One Sub-dominant Male", which means (Lemme see if I hab dis rite) dat he is second only to Dadda, an don't take orders frum ennybunny 'cept Daddy or Maman, and geds to eat furst afta Dadda an Maman, which is bifore enny catz, who are lower down onna scale ob Dawg HigherArchy.

Dawgs is berry organised.

Dawgs also hab "jobs" an dis is where we bunnies come in.

We are da Dawg's Primary Job. A'course, nobunny axted us, an we shure didn't axt to be pawt ob his Job, but heer we are...and dis is mainly cossa Maman. She has somehow let da Dawg know dat we hab to be protekted at all times. Dis means dat NO ONE can come innu da Bun Room wiffout da permisshun obba Dawg - and dat means dey habba axt Maman furst, or else da Dawg will chase dem out. Dis does not inclood Dadda, who, as Alpha Male, can do ennyfing he wants, except hurt Maman. If Maman geds hugged, denna Dawg hasta ged inna middle an protekt Maman. It's pawt ob his Job, too.

So Dawg society issa whole lot dif'runt an more complykated frum Rabbit Soceity.

Den dere is Cat Society which is also diffrunt frum an more complykated ebben den Dawg society.

Cossa catz fink ebberyfing inna whole werld belongs to them. If they can see it, it's their's an they can claim it. An so dey divide uppa houz between dem wiffoud conslutin da Dawg who finks da whole werld belongs to them.

Well, Cokie-da-Fat-Cat says he issa Tom, which means dat he gets to select fings furst wiffa permission obba Queen who is da Stoopit Cat who Maman calls "Beep" cos she hasn't told us her name yet.

Now dis Queen cat has been libbin heer for a long time, an Cokie didn't ebben know aboud her when Maman and Dadda brought him heer. He knew aboudda Dawg, cossa Dawg had been to visit Cokie in Cokie's houz, but now Cokie was comin to lib wiffa Dawg inna Dawg's houz, so alla Roolz were dif'frunt. An den Cokie discubbered da Stoopit Cat libbin uppastairs.

Well, dey were muchually surprised to see each udder, anna Dawg was like to habba fit cos he knew he was out-numbered two to one. So he fitted "Catz" innu his werld-view unnerneaf ob "rabbits", an put dem innu his Pack wiffoud realisin' dat dey were puttin him innu dere Chowder somewhere unnderneaf "rabbits" assa point-ob-innerest.

An as far assa Catz are conserned, we rabbits are funny-wookin catz. Cokie hadda run-in wif Belinda oncet, so he knows dat you don't ged close to rabbits unless you wike bein' hed-butted acrosst da floor. I fink he told Da Stoopit Cat alla'boud it, cos she don't ged up to wook at us, but she does try to come innu da Bun Room to take our hay. Why she wants our hay issa mystery, but she does - and dis alarums da Dawg who is protektin' us as pawt ob his Job.

Budda Catz don't seem to fink we need protecktin', an nedder do we. I mean, rilly, Belinda told me whut to do aboudda catz:

Furst you *thump* to warn 'em, an if they don't listen, you *honk*. If that still don't werk, you lower you hed and charge full-speeds atta middle obba cat, an' plough rite innu 'em. Then they gedda message as they are rollin acrosst da floor: don't mess wiffa rabbits. Missy sed also datta bite-onna-nose will werk wonders at improvin' cat memories aboud why dey shuldn't mess wif rabbits. Now heer issa pickchur obba Cokie-da-Fat-Cat:

At enny rate, we don't need Dawgs, rilly, but if da Collie Dawg wants to be pawt obba Warren, well, we kin find a pwace for him assa cushion, or wind-break, or shade. We don't need protekshun an we aren't an employmint oppertunity, eidder, an we shure don't need to be barked at, snuffled or sneezed ober.

We are Our Warren, Alla Us Togedder, NoBunny OnAlone.

So which pawt ob dis can't enny obba three ob dem unnerstand?

Awww, geez... now da Dawg is barkin inna Sittin' Room! An dere goes Maman to sort him oud... an heer comes a cat, runnin'...anna Dawg, chasin', an Maman, scurryin...I fink I herd sumfing go "crash" - nope, dat wassa TeeBee turnin' on - Cokie-da-Fat-Cat has sat onna Remote again...

Anudder day in Paradise...

-------- By George


Posted by Our Warren at 11:18 AM EST
Updated: Saturday, 19 March 2005 11:26 AM EST
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Friday, 18 March 2005
Spring is Sprung
Mood:  bright
Now Playing: The Bim Song
Topic: Libbin Assa Urban Rabbit

Well, it wooks to me like Spring is almost heer.

The sun is gettin' warmer. The trees seem to be wantin' to hab buds on'em. The grass almost smells like growin'.

A'course, if we libbed out-of-doors like wildbunnies, then we'd know alla'boud Spring an' whether or not it was onna'way, cos it would be a 'portant isshoo an' all, but we are Housebunnies, so it's not all that anna bag ob chips, as Dadda says. In udder werds, it's 'portant, but it's not important like life-or-death when you lib indoors assa Urban Rabbit.

In fact, the onliest reason that it's 'portant for us to know if it's Spring or not is cos if it rilly is Spring, then we habba sing The Bim Song.

Now, furst, bifore we sing it, I godda tell you sumfing aboudda Bim Song, which was furst told to me by Hunny who wassa Oldest Libbin Rabbit in Our Warren until he went toda Rainbow Bridge on Number Five Janyooary, Two-thousand, five, Year ob Our Lord, when he was Thirteen anna Half years old, which is berry old fora rabbit. An he wassa Elder ob His Peebles, which is Alla Us Togedder in Our Warren.

But we just called him Hunny an' he knowed a whole lotta fings, an' Belinda Bunny told him to teach me alla stuff dat he knowed. So he did.

And dis is whut I learned aboud Bim:

Bim was Maman's Dadda. An he wassa Perfesser ob Science Eddykayshun an Organic Chemistry.

His real name wasn't "Bim", it was "Bill", but when Maman's kidlets, Beffy an Phil-the-Lad were liddle, they culdn't say "L's", an dey sed "M's" insted. So when dey herd Maman's mawmie call her Dadda, she wuld call, "Bill! The children are heer!" an den da children wuld call afta her, "Bim! We's heer!" Just wike dat.

An so dey allus called him "Bim" an so did we.

So Bim wassa teacher, bud he also singed songs and telled a lotta stories toda kids dat he teached. And when he got older and stopped teachin' kids, he usta come ober to Maman's house to hab coffee an' to talk to her, an to seeda bunnies, anna dawgs, anna catz. He liked annymals a wot. He ebben hadda dawg at his houz, but nebber enny catz (smawt man!) an nebber enny bunnies (dat is sad) cos Maman's mawmie didn't wike bunnies (which is stoopit).

So ennyways, he usta come to see Maman most days an hab coffee which he didn't get much ob at his houz onna'count obba fakt dat Maman's mawmie didn't wike coffee.

An' onna furst warm day, he wuld come inna houz an sing a song 'boud "Spring", and sure enuf, afta he sang da song, it wuld be Spring an alla cold Winter wuld go away anna flowers wuld come up frumma ground, anna grass wuld grow, anna trees wuld bud. Dere mite still be some cold nites, and dere mite ebben be a frost or so, but almost alla Winter wuld be gone until da nextest year. All becos obba song dat he sang.

And den one day he went toda Rainbow Bridge. He went inna Autumn Time, when menny fings go toda Bridge. An' afta he left, an for a long time, dere was Winter inna houz.

An den one day, Belinda Bunny sed toda rest obba Warren, "Dere is too much Winter heer."

Now Belinda wassa Top Bun inna Warren an she culd see dat dere was Winter alla'round inna houz, an alla'round outside, too. An dere was too much Winter in Maman, too.

An Belinda sed datta bunnies wuld habba do sumfing aboud alla Winter dat was around.

An Hunny sed, "We need to sing Da Bim Song to make da Wnter go away."

So he an Belinda teached da song dey had herd Bim sing to ebberybunny inna Warren. An' den they got Alla Us Togedder to sing it.

Anna Winter went away frumma outdoors, an frumma houz an frum Maman. An berry soon, Phil came home frumma Naby on sumfing called "Leeb" an ebberyfing was hokay.

So da nextest year, Alla Us Togedder inna Warren sang The Bim Song as soon as Belinda sed it was Spring, anna Winter went away again.

And not too long afta that, I came into Our Warren.

An' then Belinda an Hunny went to da Rainbow Bridge.

So now it's time again. You see, dere is too much Winter in dis houz again. I kin see it in Maman just like Belinda sed, and it is time for it to go.

It's time for alla cold to go away. Time forda flowers to wake up inna garden. Time forda grass to begin growin. Time forda trees to hab buds on'em.

An here is me, George, wiffoud Belinda, an wiffoud Hunny an' wif too much Winter hangin' ober dis houz, an ober dis garden an ober our Maman.

So I fink dat mebbe it's time for The Bim Song to be sung in dis Warren.

The sun is stronger.
The snow is melted.
The outside smells softer.
It is time.

So heer it is, The Bim Song sung by Alla Us Togedder at Our Warren:

Spring is Sprung!
Da grass is riz!
I wonder where
Da birdies is?


------- By George

Posted by Our Warren at 12:14 PM EST
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Thursday, 17 March 2005
New Apawtmints
Mood:  cool
Now Playing: Here Comes the Sun
Topic: Movin' On!

Well, you wouldn't believe it.

We have new homes.

We are moving UP inna werld.

Now, Belinda Bunny told me that when you are "wun foot offa ground, you gots no pwace to go but up". So I guess she also told this to Maman an' Dadda, and these new habbytats are their idea ob movin' UP.

Cos we are def-in-et-ly now onna UP side ob fings.

I mean, I am now on nose-level wiffa Collie-dawg.

Yup. He and I now see eye-to-eye, ebbery morning.

It's like this:

We inna Warren wake up when it is still offishully Dark. That's when rabbits wake up to start the day - at the tail-end of Dark, just before Light.

We wake up the Sun.

It's an impawtant job, cos without us, the Sun wouldn't know it was time to rise and shine.

So all ober da werld, bunnies wake up and stawt habbin their breakfasts inna Dark. And as we're habbin our breakfasts, da Sun hears us munchin' and makin' all kinds ob noise, an wakes up and begins risin' which means that the stars begin to go to bed - one by one. If you look outta window, you can see the stars fadin out as they leave the sky an' cuddle unnerneaf ob their cloud-blankies to go to sleep - an then, as the stars leave, well, Here Comes The Sun.

So the stars go to sleep, an the sun is rising, an the bunnies are munchin and makin' noises, habbin' breakfast.

Now for us housebunnies, breakfast is mostly hay and sum pellets an wadder frum Our Crocks.

Now some bunnies are Sippers, like Beebe. They take liddle drinks ob wadder and then wander off, but some bunnies are like my MissyBun and they are Tankers. They only drink once or twice a day, but when they drink, lemme tell you, they drink! They get nose-down inna crock an' don't come up forebber, an alla time, their tummies is gurglin' and squeekin' an ebben poppin' almost - as they fill up wif wadder. You nebber heared nuffin' wike it!

Belinda could make more noise drinkin wadder on her own den almost ennybunny I knowed - cept Missy. An Missy issa champion noise-maker when it comes to drinkin' wadder. She slurps, she squeeks, she burbles, she pops, she laps; she makes all kinds ob noises - an just so dat she can wake uppa Sun. It's her job an' she does it well.

But Missy's tummy also wakes uppa Dawg.

That's the Thing aboudda dawg - he hears ebberyfing. It's like his ears have scoops on'em, so he can scoop up alla sounds inna house at nite.

So he hears MissyBun drinking, tanking up on wadder, an out he comes frumma bedroom where Maman an Dadda are sleepin' to see whut alla noise is aboud.

And the noise is Missy, drinkin'.

So the Sun is wakin up an spreadin out all ober da sky like melted budder, an heer comes da dawg to see whut's up wif Missy's tummy.

But he hardly geds innu the kitchin, before he realises dat he's hearin wadder - and you know whut that does to a dawg who has been asleep alla nite long... makes him bemember that he hasn't gone toda bafroom inna wong, wong time.

Now for sum reazon, dawgs don't hab pooty-boxes. Cats do, an bunnies do, but not dawgs. Dawgs hab "yards" outside obba back-door that they "patrol" and that's where they habba pooty-place. I know this cossa Dawg told me.

So the Dawg comes innu the kitchin an looks at us, an he hears Missy gurgling, an bemembers that he hasta go "Outside".

Well, there's a babygate, an he's not 'lowed ober it wiffout Maman or Dadda. Besides, he don't hab 'posable thumbs to opin the door. So he's stuck.

Now before, when we were only wun foot offa ground, he didn't pay us much 'tenshun. Now dat we are inna new apawtmints, and are on eye-level wif him, it's like he's made a discobbery an we're it.

"Bunnies, I needa go outside."

And him an' me wook at each udder, an I wook atta udder bunnies an shurg, because we don't have 'posable thumbs eidder, and that door is locked up tighter than a cat's butt.

So I tell da dawg, "Lookit, Dawg, you gotta go getta hoomin."

And Mouse *thumps* because that's his way of callin' to Maman.

But a Maman asleep issa Maman who is gonna stay dat way. Dere is no use in callin Maman when she's sleepin', cos she goes deaf when she's asleep.

Then sumfing goes "click" onna counter inna kitchin an it starts to rain coffee inna pot onna counter.

Anna Dawg wooks atta pot wiffa coffee raining down innit an wags his tail a widdle in a berry werried way. Cos now he's not only hearing Missy wiffa wadder, he's hearin' rain inna coffee-pot.

"Dadda's gonna come?" He axts hopefully.

So I shake my head an flap my ears around, an Missy goes on drinkin', wif her tummy making more squeeks an' bubbles.

Anna Dawg opins his mouf an grins an stawts to pant a widdle.

"I godda go out soon."

An' I'm finkin', Oh geez, he's gonna stawt dat high-pitched peepin' dat collies do. So I sed to him, "Don't wook at me. I can't help you, Dawg."

Anna Dawg stawts whinin', "I gotta see if my yard is okay. See iffa squirrels is innit, an if dere wassa'nudder dawg innit, an if my pooty-spot is still mine, an iffa fence is all okay, an..."

"So why don't you go get Dadda?" asks Mouse and he *thumps* again, cos he can't stand the whinin' enny more than I can.

An Missy's still tankin up on wadder...lap, lap, lap, bubble, bubble, squeek, squeek...

Anna Dawg is beginning to wook a widdle desprit.

"Can your missus, um, stop, um, wiffa wadder?" The Dawg axts me.

An I'm wike, "Er, no. She's tankin up forda day an wakin uppa sun."

Anna Dawg is crossin' his paws now an wavin' his tail all around, an' then he trots off, fru da dining room, an downnahall.

An I can hear him go innu da bedroom where Maman an Dadda are sleepin.

Den I hear Dadda.

Den I hear da Dawg sneeze.

Den I hear Dadda again, an he's not happy.

"For hebbin's sake, Dawg!"

And den out dey bof come downnahall, fru the dining room, fru da kitchin, an Dadda opins da baby-gate anna dawg comes dancin' through.

Then Dadda pushes da button that makes The Box say things (like, "The Alarm Is Off", aldoh it has sed udder fings, like "Doors and Windows On" and onct it sed, "Unauthorized Entry" when Dadda fortygot to push sum buttons an Maman started yellin' an Dadda was runnin' around, wooking for his keys an stuff. It was preddy funny. Dat box is sumfing, lemme tell you.).

And den Dadda opined da door anna Dawg shot outside wike his tail was on fire.

An Dadda watched him for a minit an den wooked at me an sed, "Buggerit." Which issa werd he learned frum Hunny. I don't know whut it means, but Hunny sed it a lot.

An Dadda pushed Our Curtains aside frum Our Window, and there wassa Sun, just peekin' fru the trees.

An I nudged Missy an she wooked up, too, wiffa drop ob wadder on her cute widdle nose.

"Did I do it?" She axt me.

And I sed she had.

An' she sed, "Good. 'Bout time the Sun waked up. Cos I'm almost oberflowin wif wadder."

Which issa troof, cos when she walked, she waddled, wif her tummy swingin' back and forf. But dat's the fing aboud Missy - she sure knows how to wake uppa Sun.

----- By George

Posted by Our Warren at 10:10 AM EST
Sunday, 20 February 2005
Biological Diversity
Mood:  not sure
Now Playing: Insecurity Rains!
Topic: Movin' On!

Wow. Hoomins only hab two hands. Dey are rilly challenged when it comes down to bein' annymuls.

It's too bad that they don't hab enuf 'pendanges, you know? Cos it seems like dey gots too much to do, an don't hab da 'quipmint to do it wif.

Wike dis mornin'.

Ebberyfing was preddy quiet, an I was habbin sum hay, wike Hunny teached...taught me, anna Fat Cat, whose name is Cokie, comed...came out toda gate inna Bun Room an axted:

"Why you bunnies gots fud alla time an I don't?"

So I telled...told him, "Wookit, Cokes, if you didn't eat alla your stuff anna dawg's stuff anna udder cat's stuff, too, dere wuld still be sum stuff weft in your bowl. Want sum hay?"

And he said, "I'm gonna go wake uppa Dadda an ged sum fud, budda Dawg's inna doorway an I can't get fru wiffout him jumpin up and geddin in my face an tryin to 'herd' me away frumma bed. It's MY bed an dat's MYDadda, too! I don't wike it heer! Dis noo house stinks."

And I said toda Cokie-cat: "Wookit, you godda share. It whut we do. It's bein pawt obba Warren."

Anna Cokie sat down an sed, "Cats don't gots Warrens, Rabbit. You is pawt ob My Chowder. We gots Chowders anna females, wike KayCee are in charge. Now KayCee knew howta runna Chowder, lemme tell you! But Phil-da-Lad taked her wif him an weft me wif da Stoopit Cat who don't know how to run nuffin, who issa 'fraid obba Dawg - KayCee was nebber afraid, cept forda wun time when she was wike, velcroed toda dawg's face an he couldn't see an dey bof ran into da wall, wif ebberyone screamin', incloodin Maman - but KayCee nebber letta fud bowls ged empty. She knowed howta get things dun. Da Stoopit Cat dat libs heer don't know datta Dawg issa herder an don't bite. You jus walks unner neaf ob him when he's tryin to herd you an he geds his hed tangled up in his legs tryin to follow you an falls ober. It issn't hard to mess wif dis Dawg's hed."

An I sed, "So, wike, whut's da pwoblem?"

An Cokie stawted to gwoom himself, which is sad, cos I don't hab to gwoom myself. I gwoom Missy and she gwooms me. I fink cats hab it hard cos dey do alla dere gwooming OnAlone.

An between licks, Cokie sed, "I don' wanna share. Cats don' share. We hab stuff. My chair inna sitting room, My bowl. My bed. My Dadda! Me, my, MINE."

So I wooked at Missy an Missy wooked at me an I knowed...knew 'zacktly whut she was finking, namely, dat to be pawt obba Warren, you hab to do fings Alla Us Togedder.

An I also know dat when Cokie wailed, "MINE" wike dat, datta Dawg was gonna heer it, an he did, an preddy soon, oud he comes, wif his toenails goin tappy-tap onna floor obba kitchin.

Anna Dawg is wike, "So whuttsup wif you, Cat?"

An Cokie glares atta Dawg an says, "Go wook inna bowl."

So da Dawg goes to wook inna bowls dat is lined up by da Welsh Dresser, and Cokie whispurrs to me,

"Dat Dawg is so stoopit, too. Does ennyfing you tell him. I don' ged it! Hassn't he gots enny Pride at all?"

Anna Dawg ambles back an yawns an says, "Dey is all empty wif nuffin in'em. So wassamatter? Fud will come when Dadda wakes up. Hope it's soon. I godda go, you know, OutSide, an check my yard."

Anna Cokie Cat grumbles, "Oh yeah, your yard. How could I have forgotten it's your yard an I'm not 'lowed out dere?"

An I sed, "Wookit, Cokie, I'm not 'lowed out inna yard eidder an I don wanna go. I gotta habbytat an dat's whut's rite forda Warren. So da Dawg has gotta yard. You gotta red chair inna sittin' room."

"Only when Dadda's not innit," Sed Cokie. "Cos when he's innit, he wants me outta it. Says I'm too big an datta Dawg wants pets too an dat he don't hab enuf hands an dat we is all 'insekure'."

An I sed, "I'm not insekure. I'm preddy sekure rite where I am. You ged usta fings when dey are around for a widdle while."

Anna Cokie-cat wooked at me an at Beebe in da udder habbytat an Beebe-Bunny sed, "Yo!" which is his normal comment on most fings.

Den Cokie shook his hed, an sed, "Wookit, Dawg, dere is no fud. You gets to go outside inna yard. You ged alla pets an fusses -"

"Do not." Sedda Dawg. "Maman is allus tellin' me, 'Marc, Down.' which is a Command, and I hafta Obey Commands. I lernt dat in Beedy'ence Skool. When I Obey Commands, I am part obba Pack. Not Obeying Commands puts me outside obba Pack and that is not good."

So I axted da Dawg, "Whutssa 'Pack" fing?"

Anna Dawg sed, "Like a Warren, but for dawgs, an it has dif'frunt Roolz."

Anna Cokie-cat sneezed, cossa Dawg is sheddin fluff.

And den Cokie sed, "Well, I ain't in no 'Pack'."

Anna Dawg sed, "Ebberyone heer is inna Pack. Dat's whut dis is - da Pack. Dadda issa Alpha Male, Maman issa Alpha Female. I'm Sekond Male, an you are down dere wiffa rest ob my 'sponsibilities."

Anna Cokie-Fat-Cat sed, "I ain't pawt obba Pack, you Stoopit Dawg! You are a pawt ob My Chowder,"

So I inner'rupted him an sed, "I thought we wassa One Big Warren, Alla Us Togedder."

An we all wooked at each udder.

Anna Dawg wet outta small "peep" ob anxiety an sort ob collapsed onna floor.

"I dunno whut we are, but I know I gotta go OutSide rilly soon!" He whined.

"Why can't you use a litter-box like da west ob us?" axted Cokie, gettin' up.

"Cos I amma Dawg. Hey, Cat, where you goin'?"

Cos Cokie was on his feets and thuddin outta da kitchin on his way toda dinin' room where I couldn't see him, but I could heer him anna Dawg still arguin':

Cokie: Gonna wake up Dadda. Get off my tail, you stoopit dawg!

Dawg: You can't wake uppa Dadda! It's not rite to disturb da Alpha Male! It's against da Roolz!

Cokie: An wike I told you bifore where you can stick your Roolz. (Nuffin is as sarcastik assa Cat, lemme tell you!)

Dawg: Bud you hafta Obey Commands.

Cokie: Put your "Commands" rite back there along wif your "Roolz". I amma Cat. Inna Chowder, only da Alpha Female an that would beKayCee who isn't heer can tell me whut to do.

Dawg: The Alpha Female is Maman!

By now, da Dawg was barkin, anna Cokie-Cat musta jumped onna bed cos I herd Dadda yellin, "Will you two buggers pack it in?" an he was angry.

An sure enuf, preddy soon, here comed..came da Dawg, anna Cokie-Cat, followed by a rilly meeny-faced Dadda, all poundin fru da kitchin.

So Dadda opined da door anna Dawg went OutSide, an den da Fat Cat an Dadda went back innu da Kitchin an Dadda poured Kitty-kibble inna bowls, anna Dawg began to bark greetin's toda udder dawgs inna area, an Dadda hollared, "Pack it in, Marc!" an Marc did, cos axtchually, he's preddy smart fora dawg.

An den Dadda sets da bowl ob kitty-kibble onna floor an stawts makin' tea for himself an coffee for Maman.

An he's wike, well, grumblin, to himself, sort ob rumblin wike his tea-wadder-boiler, sayin',

"Only got two hands..." an den he comes innu da Bun Room an opins Da Big White Box, takes outta milk jug, slams da door, an wooks at me an says, "An whutta you buggers want?"

An I wooked at him an sed...said, "We're fine. But da udder two... Well, dere mite be sum ishoos..."

But I don't fink he herd me, cos he was alreddy on his way back innu da Kitchin. Hoomins don't hab big ears for rilly good listenin'.

An dey only hab two hands...

Posted by Our Warren at 9:50 AM EST
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Saturday, 19 February 2005
Change
Mood:  not sure
Now Playing: Crazy, Just Crazy... By George
Topic: Movin' On!

A brief sum'ry ob My Life since comin to Our Warren:

Noo home. Noo House. Noo Maman an Dadda. Noo Warren. Noo almost-mawmie. No new almost-mawmie. Noo wifebun (nice!) Noo Habbytat.

Now anudder Noo House, noo Bun Room anna'nudder Noo Habbytat.

Anna noo Dawg, anna noo cat.

Assa Gen'ral Rool bunnies don't like *Change* - and I'm finkin' dat dere is just a widdle too much obbit goin on rite aboud now.

Bunnies like whut we know: da pootie box in dis colour, at dis place, alla time; da food crock in dis colour, in dis place, filled at dis time, alla time. Same wiffa wadder crock anna fleecy blankie, anna seagrass mats. Rite where we left it, in dis place, in dis condishun, alla time.

Ebben if it's not perfect, an it's not 'zacktly as it perhaps should or could be, it's ours and we know it and 'speckt it.

You opin your eyes inna mornin, an ebberyfing is "Hokay", you know? Sure, mebbe Owd Hunny hassa wind up that's got the room smellin 'nuff to make your head spin an your ears droop, but it's hokay, cos you know dat he's ober dere, habbin hay an habbin a nap. Ob course, you sort ob wish dat he didn't habba wind up along wiffit, but dere's a down-side to ebberyfing, right?

An den One Day, you wake up, opin your eyes an Owd Hunny has gone. But's dat's still hokay, inna way, cos he's bin tellin you aboudda Rainbow Bridge, an how he's bin seeing His Maggie an His Poet in his owd bunny dreams, an how he just can't cope wif ebberyting an how tired he is, an how much his insides hurt, an how lucky he is to be Firteen-anna-half yeers owd an how most ob alla dat time, he's bin a rescued bunny. An he's been helpin you to unnerstan a wotta fings - an I do mean a whole wotta fings.

So when he leaves for the Rainbow Bridge, you're sorry dat you are left behind an stuff, but you are happy for his sake dat he's on his way.

Dis kinda *Change* is Normal.

But moovin' houses is Not Normal.

You should nebber habba leave The Warren, no madder whut. The Warren, ebben if it's not perfeckt, is still, The Warren.

So Hokay, ebberybunny is heer inna Noo House an that feels rite. An alla furnitchur is heer, an that smells rite.

But then there's the Noo Bun Room an that doesn't feel right an the Noo Habbytats an they don't smell rite an you kinda loose your sense of directshun.

You wake up, an it's like, "Whut da heck?"

An Maman all skert aboudda "bills" anna "munny" anna "counts" an as she calls it, "whut goes where and to whom from which" cos it's stuff she's not good at, nuffin wike music or History, an Dadda racin' around wike a chased bunny, tryin to do ebberyfing on his ownst, cossa dere bein just him an Maman an Maman bein' not-so-well.

An when your Maman is skeert, lemme tell you, ebberybunny else is preddy darned skert rite along wif her, too. When Maman can't ebben fink ob whut to eat fer Tea, whoa, you know fings are going pear-shaped inna hurry - and I don't mean da kinda pears you kin eat, eidder.

Cos she told me she's so 'fraid ob makin a mistake. She nebber wants to do ennyfing da wrongk way-round. Nebber cause ennybun trubble or inconbeenyance, nebber do whut's not rite, nebber choose the wrongk pafway, nebber - in her werds - "Screw up".

Now, she's been told dat ennyfing dat's done "in Love" is not wrongk. Or dat enny decision dat's been considered, an thought through an chosen prayerfully, and thoughtfully, will be the bestest one to make - well, she won't rilly beeleeb dat, cos she allus finks she could hab done bedder if she had only tried harder.

Only Tried Harder

Well, while she's tryin harder, she's wearin herself out an wearin us out wif her tryin, too.

An den, ebben afta she's gone an dun sumfing, she allus feels dat she's somehow "screwed up", so we feel dat we hab "screwed up", too, just cos dat feeling of gen'ral screwyness is inna air.

An meanwhile, ebberfing is changing, wedder we want it to or not.

An ebberyone 'specktin Maman to probide answers to dere questshuns, while ebben she don't habba answers, an don't habba energy or unnerstandin to provide da answers, an bein afraid ob gibbin da wrongk answer or ebben bein s'spekted ob not gibbin da rite answer, or not tryin hard enuff...

Know whut I mean? We're rowin' a boat wif one oar.

It's just crazy around heer. Crazy.

So we got dees noo habbytats an dey are huge, roomy habbytats, wif coated wire dat I can't chew on, (so Makin' A Hole has gone outta da question), an tops so we can't be visited by dat Dawg or Da Catz, an wheels so we can be moobed, an being two-foots offa ground so we're taller den alla udder four-foots inna houz - which is preddy neat, if you axt me. Now I kin wook dat Collie Dawg inna eye ebbery time he goes by an I kissed his nose dis mawnin, which 'prised da heck outta him. (Cos Belinda bited him!) An he sneezed on me, which was preddy yucky for a few minutes. Luckily, dog-snot is mostly wadder.

So *Change* is bof good and not good. It just IS.

An it's gonna come, no madder whut decisions Maman makes. She can't be perfect, anna *changes* aren't gonna wait for her to dither ober. She's got to set her feets an her faith an just go wif Wun Day's Werry Atta Time.

An about Hunny an Hawthorn, an Belinda, an Oscar, an Tulip, an Gideon, an Mister Bean, an Dove an Angel, an alla udder bunnies who hab left heer to go to the Rainbow Bridge... Dose are Big Changes, too, an hoomins don't seem to unnerstan dose well, eidder.

But you know wut? Phil-the-Lad told me dis:

Sumtimes you hab to lose sumfing great to make room for bigger and bedder fings.

Dat's da Cirkul dat Hunny talked about to me. An it's da Way ob Fings. Bunnies unnerstan dis a wot bedder den hoomins do, I fink, which is kinda why I was 'prised when Phil-da-Lad got it, too, cos he's notta bunny.

But Hunny 'splained it to me wike dis: If nobunny ebber went toda Bridge, dere would be no place for me in Our Warren, an soon da whole werld would be full up ob bunnies wifoud warrens or Mamans or Daddas, an everybun would be OnAlone, forever, lost inna crowd ob strangers. Dis way, we moob frum place to place, frum nowhere, to heer to Da Rainbow Bridge, then on to Da Meadow an then on to the Great Journey to the Greater Warren wif our Mamans an Daddas - and who knows where afta that?

But the fing is, it's going to happen, an it's not sumfing dat we can "screw up".

It's not a test. It's not aboud bein' perfeckt. It's not that we're geddin' grades on ebberyfing we do or say. It's just Life: To be lived and loved, to give and to reciebe; ebberyfing in it's own time.

I just hope Maman geds those noo pootyboxes, though. Cos dis wun just needs a *change*!

---By George ob Our Warren---

Posted by Our Warren at 11:32 AM EST
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Sunday, 6 February 2005
Bememberin'
Mood:  lucky
Now Playing: One Great Warren
Topic: Libbin Assa Urban Rabbit

You know, one ob my good friends an sumbunny that I admire, Sheeba, has her own blog now, and she brought up a berry good Point:

Yes, it is berry troo dat we hab lost alla Senior Bunnies who made up da Original Our Warren now.

And dis is berry sad. In fact, Our Maman still cries ober Blinda's toys, an Hunny's Tin Cup, an Maggie's spoons, an ebbery time she wooks atta Our Warren Home Page and sees alla piccies obba bunnies who hab gone on to da Rainbow Bridge she cries sum more. Maman is berry sad rite now.

But Sheeba brought uppa Point an dat Point was dat while it is sad dat so many ob Our Warren hab left us for da Bridge, alla dem libbed long, happy lives in Our Warren.

Hunny and Hawthorn hadda Bunny Ministry at St. Luke's and Belinda ebben got in onna act. Belinda was web-mistress for RIFRAF's web-site an helped form an organnyzashun for bunnies to hab a voice onna WerldWideWeb an to improb housebunny Rites. Maggie an Hunny were IN Maman and Dadda's wedding as da Flower Bun an Ring Bearer Bun. Smokey went to talk to childrens at Parkway School aboudda HouseBunnies an How To Be A 'Sponsible Pet Owner. Hawthorn visted sick hoomins atta hospiddles. An sumbun allus went toda Blessing Obba Annymals atta Cathedral an St. Luke's.

A lotta bunnies here did a lotta stuff in dere lives.

But as Sheeba says, she is sad for da bunnies who went to da Bridge who nebber got 'dopted, who nebber got rescued; da bunnies who died ob neglect in back yards an sheds an basements, in tiny dark cages, or let loose in strange parks wif dawgs or foxes or who were used to train pitbulls to kill or who were made innu fur wraps for Paris Hilton an her kind, or who were made innu stew an all udder horrible fings. An it happens all ober da werld.

Sheeba is sad forda bunnies who were tortured by medical labs, and cruel hoomins, like da poor "Lucky" who was taped up wif fireworks and thrown into a pond just cos her hoomin didn't want her. Her hoomin keeps gettin "continues" on his trial. He thought it wassa joke to blow up his pet bunny wif fireworks.

But Lucky got saved. She got a noo home an is safe now.

But what if no one had bin there to save her? Whut aboudda poor dawg in Philadelphia who got gasoline poured on him and set on fire cos he stole a sandwhich cos he was hungry? He hadda be helped to da Bridge by kind strangers who had no udder way to help him, cos he was hurt too bad.

Whut aboud alla poor furkids and featherkids and finkids who die wifout knowing anyone to love them? Sheeba is sad about them, too, cos dey hab gone to the Rainbow Bridge without a voice, without a home, many without even a name.

Cos you know whut? Enny one ob dose poor nameless, voiceless, helpless bunnies culd hab bin one ob us.

It could hab bin Heatherington (ATB) - cos he was inna 'quarium, inna pet store window, next to a snake, all skert an on cedar shavings that are poison, wifout food, till Maman an Phil got him out.

It could hab been Willow (ATB) - cos she wassa Easter Bunny nobody wanted to buy an was gonna be fed to a snake! But Maman an Phil got her furst.

It could hab bin Hunny (ATB) - cos he was atta Yard Sale, wiffa tag on him dat sed "Rabbit with cage $5.00", sittin all day inna hot sun wif no food or wadder, hardly breathin, till Maman got there and grabbed him up an taked him home to start Our Warren.

It coulda bin Mouse - cos Mouse's owner wasn't 'lowed to keep him ennymore an he was takin him toda V-E-T to help him ober da Bridge cos he was 'fraid whut wuld become ob him atta shelter or if he was sold inna noospaper. He lubbed him too much to let him go to a bad place, but didn't know enny good places, till he heard 'bout Maman an Dadda an Phil.

It coulda bin Smokey (ATB) - cos sumbunny wanted to buy him to kill him for food, till Maman an Phil gotted dere furst!

It could hab bin me - left inna box wif nuffin inna V-E-T's office, till Maman comed and getted me just bifore Belinda went toda Bridge.

We was all found cos we was meant to be found an 'dopted. We was all chosen. We was all berry watched ober by SumBun Speshul. We was all berry lucky an blessed.

But, wike Sheeba, I am also sad for dose dat weren't gibben enny chance at all.

Well, I was rescued. I hab a Voice onna Web. I am one obba lucky buns. I habba Gift an I hab to use it as best I kin to help udders.

An dat's why I wanna use my voice to tell hoomins 'bout kindness and how wunnerful we are, an 'bout rescues an 'bout how precious Life rilly is. Cos we all share dis planet, Alla Us Togedder, as Hunny usta say, One Great Warren, an as Belinda usta say, NoBunny OnAlone!

If you hab a voice, you have a Gift, too. Please use it to help save sumbun who has no voice, cos dose ob us wifout voices hab udder Gifts to share. Like Love - Companionship - Life.

One ob Maman's hoomin friends is a berry 'pawtant lady. Her name issa Reverend Doctor Virginia M. Sheay and she said dis: "We are stewards, not owners, of this planet."

Which means, Maman says, dat sumday all hoomins will be asked to gib an Account ob how well dey took care ob Da Master's Werld. She said it means hoomins habba 'sponsibility to wook afta da Voiceless and dose who journey wif us fru Life. Maman geds berry pash'net 'bout dis stuff an I don't unnerstand alla stuff she talks and writes aboud, but I do know dat dees few fings I've listed down heer will help. Pwease consider using your Gifts an join wif me an' help udders...

1.) Please don't wear sumbunny else's fur. Dey hadda die just so you can be in fashun. What is fashunable aboud wearin sumbun else's skin?
2.) Don't ebber gib innu da inclination to be cruel. Walk on dat udder critter's paws. Feel dere heart beat in your heart an hear dere widdle thoughts inside ob your head.
3.) Neuter and spay your pets. Don't breed. Dere are too menny ob us wifout homes as it is.
4.) You can't gib life. You have no right to take it away, unless you are a V-E-T an are being humane.
5.) Make sure dat hoomins who are cruel to animals are punished and that laws are made tougher to protect animals who cannot protect themselves! We hab no voice in your gobbermint. We can't make laws or have a say inna Courtroom. But YOU can.

One Great Warren, Alla Us Togedder; NoBunny OnAlone.

Posted by Our Warren at 2:59 PM EST
Saturday, 29 January 2005
George In Charge (If Mouse Doesn't Mind)
Now Playing: Garden Plans


Maman is sad because alla bunnies who have gone to the Bridge are buried at the Old House and can't be moved to the New House. Da Mom-Mom who is Maman's mawmie didn't like us - thought we was rodents! Ennyways, Maman is all upset.

So Dadda called Mr Steve who deals in dirt. Not just little bits of dirt, but truck loads offa stuff, an Dadda 'splained to Mr Steve that he wanted the area where alla bunny cemetary is to be buried unner a huge pile ob top soil.

No Mr Steve is a nice man. Maman's father, our Bim, teached him in school an Mr. Steve says Bim saved him frum becomin' a "punk" (whutebber dat is) and teached him to be 'sponsible. Got him to be 'Tellygint, like Hunny and Belinda did for me. So Mr. Steve said he would help Dadda rake a coupla tonnes ob top soil ober da cemetary an replant it wif nice grass so no one would disturb da bunnies dat was dere - ebber.

So dat made Maman feel a widdle bedder.

Den Maman gotta idea to make a garden heer at dis house for ALLA BUNNIES an to hab a plant for each bunny. Dere will be ...
Tea Roses for Hunny cos he was so sweet an he was her Boy
A Hawthorn bush for Hawthorn
A Smoke Bush (dy nomrally grow innu trees but Dadda finks he kin keep it small) for Smokey
Some Heather for Heatherington
A Willow Tree atta top obba triangle dey gots planned for Willow-bunny wif a bird baf unner-neaf it.
An dey are gonna shop aroud for sumfing suitable for Luckie-bun, an dey are not sure whut to get Belinda, cept it hasta be steck'tackular cos she wassat kind of bunny.
And dere will be a Herb Garden nextest to the Kitchen door cos all English Gardens habba herb garden nextest toda door, an Maman is gonna try growing Herbs In Pots like Laura Hardy always does. (Only it allus werks for Auntie Laura!)

An Maman has graph paper an hassa Protracktor anna Ruler dat she borrowed frum Bim Drawin Board and she werks on drawin the Garden at nite while Dadda reads. He looks over an says it shouldn't be too hard an den calls up his friend, Mr. Lee, who hassa Roto-Tilly.

And Mr. Steve is gonna take out one obba trees dat wooks wike it's waaaaay too big an alla roots are onna top obba "lawn". And Dadda said he anna Mr Don nextest door are gonna dig a drainaige sumpfing so we don't getta pond atta end obba yard ebbery time it rains. Dadda knows alla'bout dis stuff frum Inkwand an Mr. Don knows alla'bout it frum libbin inna middle obba back ob beyond.

And no werd frum Sistah. Marc da dawg is mad at her cat, doh an keeps chasin it uppastairs. Maman finks dat Marc used to be told to do dis alla time, and now he fink he should. He's 'fraid he's not gonna get food eidder, so Maman is preddy sure dat dere were times when da munny she gabe sistah for food went for sumfing else. An her "boyfrien" found Our Phil's web-site an wanted to know why "sum pipple" were so "stingy" an meen to dere rellytibs. It's allus hard when you leeb a Warren. It is bedder to stay an werk an make da Warre a bedder place. You mite not ged ebbery ting you want, but you at least get part ob it. Wike we gots da dawg an Mouse gets to pee on him. For now. I herd Maman orderin da habbytat dat will wet her moob Mouse outta da way obba dawg. Mouse will hab ot find udder fun - but I also fink she mite be wookin for a gurl for him. Now that's gonna be a JOB!

And I'm werking hard at keepin fings runnin smoofly atta Warren. Da pootie box is fulla pooties, but da yard is more fulla snow. Dadda said we is atta impasse.

We'll see abouddat.

Posted by Our Warren at 12:38 PM EST
Thursday, 27 January 2005
I, George II
Now Playing: NoBunny OnAlone - EBBER!

Dis is such a sad day. Da Black Rabbit has comed for Our Oscar Ball.

Our Osacr Ball lived with Auntie Carla in a pwace called SoCal. Sounds wike "SoWhut", but it's called "SoCal" an it nebber rains dere at all 'ept for a liddle tiny bit - whih is sumfing I hab learned.

But Oscar's pickchur is ebberywhere. He is sorta the FACE OB PB cos he is onna Hareware shirts an totes. Maman wants an Oscar Tote now too, like she got for AunTammy who carries her tote to werk and brags to ebberybun dat she knows "da bunny onna bag".

And Maman wants to get Phil-da-Lad annuder Oscar shirt dat says "I don't do windows" cos Phil says Windows XP issa pain in his patoot, an Oscar kinda sums up Phil-da-Lad's Phillyosophy ob Lif.

Afta she read about Oscar, Maman put on Pakybell's "Cannon" to listen to (It's got nuffin to do wif guns or fings dat go *bang*).

A long time ago, in Inkland, she had a student who couldn't play the violin at all, but he loved this piece of music. He wassa 'dult and he came wif his kidlet to her community class to "go on" frum where he had stopped learning violin in school - which was like from the furst day's class.

He had hands as big as shubbles (as dey say up Norf in Lancashire), an sum peoples made fun ob him and sum peoples told him to his face dat he was too old an too stoopit for dis "cwassikal musik stuff" an dat it was "above him" but he had will, and inside his soul, which in many ways was dark and sad and full of hurt, he had delicacy. And dose are da fings dat Maman, nebber habbin learned aboud da udder fings, was waching for.

And he asked Maman if he could learn to play Pakybell's Cannon in her class.

And Maman looked at him and she thought to herself that he had the will, and there was hope in his eyes and yes, she could teach him - IF - and it was a rilly big "if" - he would follow through on his desire "to want". Cos many hoomins "Want" to play dis find or dat fing, and dey come to Maman and fink dat she will just somehow make it happen in a year or so, like waving a magic stick ober dere heds or speaking sekret werds.

Maman is a magician, but she cannot do "wants".

But dis person didn't "want". He wanted da music more den wadder, more den Craisins, more den nice werds frum odder peoples. An dat is whut she saw in his eyes.

So she ordered up the music. Not the cut-down, milk-with-toast, kiddies' music, but the real stuff that doesn't come wif pikchurs an potted hist'ries.
An den she found anudder violinist who wanted to sharpen his Grade 7 skills, an she sat down at her desk an adapted the 'cello part anna coninuoso part, she taught them Pakybells Cannon.

And since she was startin frumma beginning, she made a hole in their hearts that would just fit the music. She used tennise balls to hold their wrists away from their instruments and taught them to bow by slicing tomoatoes paper-thin wifout bruising da skin. She bought dem bags of peppermints to teach dem notes on lick'rish staves and spoke in Italian to dem, and made dem walk around "Andnte".

And most of all she played the music over and over until it came alive somewhere insdie of them. And on walks, she told them stories she made up about the music and tied the stories to the land over which they walked, so that here, beside a willow, a pony danced, and there, just down the Downham Road came a ships' Officer, long away at the wars. And she made them believe that this music was a background for life, that it played while the sycamore tree grew and the cloud patches dropped fitful gusts of rain across Pendle Hill.

And seated before her fire, she made them transcribe their parts on staved paper so that they knew the shape and feel and weight of each note, and how every note was as valuable as every other note, and how they dovetailed into each other, and how a "Canon" was not a "rondelay" and how music came to be and the mechanicas it used to touch the heart.

"I played it in my sleep!" one of them said one lesson.

And she asked if he played alone or with others and he said with others.

It wasn't until he could play his part, alone, all by himself, that she was pleased with him.

And so while the other teachers thought she was wasting her time not "teaching by the book" one technique after another, her two students got all the techniques as they were needed in Packybell.

These were Maman's last students. After that, her bones began to grind and the nerves were trapped and her hands lost their strength. She tried playing for only a quarter of an hour a day, but it only got worse. the dotors took pikcurs of her neck and shoulders - but Maman says you play the 'cello with the whole body.

And so, one day the 'cellist couldn't play, you see.

So maybe that is what it is with Oscar. He has made the Oscar-shaped hole in our hearts and showed us how to care for rabbits, and how to be rabbits of few words and outstanding presance. He has shown us how to be important just by being who we are.

Oscar with us, showed us the way - and not the rabbit-childer's way, but the full rabbit way - to love, to care, to roll into a ball and to bring joy to others. Just because he was here. Oscar showed us how to be rabbits of few words an huge presance. When he talked, we listened.

But like the 'cellist whose time is no longer to play, it's now not time for Oscar to be HERE. He has business elsewhere. Maman is still trying to find her place "somewhere else", but Oscar has found his place - being Oscar, a bun of few words and great heart.

Come and follow; come and be. We are all part of one great warren, linked by silver chains forged forged of golden links of love. The chain goes on forever, each link taking something from the link before it and passing it on to the link that comes after.

Maman has no notion what becane of her students. Their own lives may have dragged them down, their frailities perhaps overcame them, or perhaps they took their violins and soared like kestrels against the blue skies over Swanside Plantation. She always told them to leave their cases open, that someone would venture by and be drawn to play, that instruments call to the pure of heart in their own undiminished voices.

Maman's 'cello is closed so that it cannot call to her. It is fragile and old and needs work before it can be played. Maybe Dadda will get her a practice 'cello if someone helps him find one - but somewhere, close to the surface of Maman's heart, maybe deeper in other hearts, the music plays on if only as a faint memory.

And everyone who hears music in their heart is the better for it - because it speaks of a time when they were honest in their desires and their only wish was to have that music inscribed upon their hearts. It was a time of innocense and they were the better for it - just as we are the better for having known Oscar Ball, with his feets on the computer and his dark eyes shining, laughing at all our pseudo-seriousness.

Gentle Oscar, Belinda told me that where you are there is lovely music playing all of the time and the greenest grass you've ever imagined. When it's my turn, I'll come and join you. She said the burrows are swept and clean and just the right size for a bunny to roll into a ball. Hunny will show you the way. He was very wise. Just don't let Belinda talk you into "sumpwace bedder" - Hunny knows all the best places for lounging. So does Hawthorn. Belinda never was very good at lounging.

And I, George, will stay here until it's my time. I promised Belinda and I promised Hunny and I will do it. And look, Oscar! I've learned already that music is a language not exclusive to hoomins, that it has the power to heal, and the power to give - and so gently, too, that even the tears it inspires are soft, like the morning's newest dew. I can gather them from Maman's cheeks in my fur and lick Maman's nose and let her know that I know what every bunny in a Warren already knows - and you know it too, and so does Wally - that we are not afraid. The Cyrckle comes full turning, and we have more than Hope, we Know.

Until a little later, dear friend!

Posted by Our Warren at 2:39 PM EST
Wednesday, 26 January 2005
I, George
Now Playing: Top Bun (if Mouse says it's hokay)

It is Time.

Belinda sed so when I was sleepin last nite. It was like she and I were talking togedder and I waked up a dif-frunt bunny,

I am now George. It is my job now to reed da noos wif Maman an commint on it.

It is my job to commint on ebberyfing dat goes on around heer.

If a dawg or a cat geds outta line, I gotta deal wiffit.

If dere is nod enfu hay, I hafta be da Reminder Bunny.

I hafta show da way when gettin my toenails clipped.

Belinda said dat I am 'Tellygint now, but dat no matter how 'tellygint I ged, there will allus be noo stuff to learn about.

She also sed dat I have a big job ahead of me.

She sed I have to make Maman CARE again.

Not care aboutta bunnies, cos she cares for us alla time, but she is habbin trubble doin fings dat don't require crying. Sbe needs to go out cos she is 'fraid. So I have to be brave for her.

She hasta getta 'dresses onna stickers to send fing to hoomins. And take da boxes to peoples.

She hasta get dressed an not be fraid ob starbin an stuff dat isnt gonna happin.

So Tidday, I am makin her do da laundry wif us. Here inna Bun Room cos Dadda and his friend Lee-da-Lektrician habbint taken outta old washer/dryer and put inna noo one that will save us on space and make the Noo Bun Room Bigger. And Maman hasta see aboutta banking stuff, tiday, too.

So dis is I, George, who is now a growed up bunny, plannin on geddin more 'Tellygint by da day. Mamam lost a lotta her confydence. She put onna pawty an atta wast momint alla peebles frumma place where she werked fortygotted to come. And only one called to tell her in advance. So she was all dressed up, with food out an all and she cried an cried.

Hoomins fortyged how bad dey hurt odder hoomins feelins.

Den dis stoopit boy who Sistah went to live wif, he writed to Our Phil that Sistah's family "deserted" her, cos she has no munny. An Our Phil was like, "well whut about whut you stole frumma Mom-mom? What aboud da munny Dadda and Momma paid for her elektrick?" and he was like "They aren't doing it now. They abandoned her!" And it's like no - when YOU leave a warren, it is your choice to leave it. It's not the Warren's job to chase you down and gib you stuff. Specially when you said you nebber wanted to be near the Warren again, an abandoned ebberyone.

But Maman cried. She has no more daughter cos dis one said loud and a lot that she dont want Maman as a mawmie. It's passing strange. I looked and looked for a mawmie and couldn't find one, and here was a perfectly good Maman that wasn't wanted. It wasn't dat Maman choosed not to have Sistah, it was Sistah who chose to hab no Maman. No blanket ob lies will ebber cobber up the troof dat Sistah was never once told to go, never once frown out. All dat was said wassat dere wuld be no new hoomins brought innu da Warren. But den da werds got all twisted, till dey comed out saying something else.

But fings is like that, I guess. Som hoomins play wif werds like toys, tossing them around until they are upside down and bwoken. But words dat are the Trrof have power and don't break. Dey stay alive in the air.

NoBunny was driven frum dis Warren. Nobunny was abandoned. One bunny DECIDED to leave on her own and make her own warren. And that is right.

So from now on I am I, George. And I am angry that hoomins are stupid and ruthless and liars and hurt each other to the hurt of the Warren. I am berry angry dat da Black Rabbit seems to be looking for Maman's Maman. Dis is a lot, all at once.

Dat is why Belinda came an hadda talk wif me. She took the bestest care of the Warren, she and Hunny and now I have to take the bestest care of it. The whole werld issa Warren an we take care of each udder alla time, NoBunny OnAlone.

I knowed it was Belinda who talked to me while I was sleepin, cos she hopped straight up to me an said to me, "I can't be habbin wif dis stuff - an needer can you, Babby George! Can't be habbin wiffit and it hasta end. Dis Warren has ben Weederwess Too Wong - nuffin's gettin dun! So you ged out dere an do it, Bunnyboy, cos if you don, den nobun else will!"

So dat's me. I, George. And dis will be the Warren where I belong. Mouse said he'll fink it ober. As long as he gets to pee onna dawg, he's all for me being Top Bun.

But this is Our Warren. Alla us Togedder, NoBunny OnAlone.

Posted by Our Warren at 12:24 PM EST

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