Now Playing: The Rain is Rainin' Alla 'Round
Topic: Libbin Assa Urban Rabbit
You should see what's going on outside obba winder! I can see it now, but last night it was kind obba mystery and ob course, being a mystry, it waked uppa whole house and there wassa lotta "buggerin' about" as Dadda says.
I was just sleepin', you know, kinda dozing here next to Missy inna habbytat, when alla sudden, she kinda shifts her weight and ~*~*~WHAM~*~*~, she lets out with a *THUMP* that bounced me up inna air like about three inches offa ground.
So when I hit bottom again, I axted her, "Hey, whuttaheckwas'satalla'bout, huh?"
And she said, "Wisten." (Which in Missy-speak means hold up your ears and tune in.) So I did.
Well, there wassa sound of something hitting on the winder-glass inna Bun Room!
So I called over to Hunny (who hassa lot more hextperience in things than I do, onna'count ob being firteen Years Old anna Senior Bun), "Hey Hunny! Whuttaheckissat?"
And I hadda shout it twice cos Hunny is Firteen Years old an preddy deaf (which mean means he don't hear too good).
So he wakes up finally, and lifts up his loppy ears and says, "Buggered if I know. Hab sum hay an go to sleep. If it was bad, Maman would come an ged us."
So I stood up and alla-sudden, ~*~*~*~WHAM~*~*~*~, Missy lets out with a'nudder mega-thump like one ob dem "earthyquakes" I reeded about inna noospapers (where the ground shakes unner you), and I tip ober.
So I gathered my feets unner me again, an stood up, and went ober to the side of the habbytat and called over to Beebe, "YO!" (Cos this is Beebe's favourite werd.)
And he calls back, "YO!"
And I axt, "You hear dat, Dood?"
And Beebe yells back (cos Beebe has no udder volume setting besides "yell") "YEAH! I HEAR IT!"
And I hear Clover shifting her beauty-eous Agouti bulk and murmur, "Settle down, ShortStuff", which is her name for Beebe when she's not lettin' him "'ave one around th' ear 'ole", as she says.
And Mouse mumbles, "Lookit, stoopit, can't you smell the rain?"
And I put my nose up, and yup, that's exactly what I do smell - Rain.
But what's hitting the winder and making alla noise?
Cos, you see, I know about Rain. It's wadder that falls outta the sky and makes hay grow. Maman has told me alla'bout it. It's knowing about stuff like "rain" and "snow" and "thunder" and "lightning" (the last two of which I don't like, by the way, and nidder does Missy), and "wedder" in general, that makes me a 'Tellygint House Rabbit.
But this pounding onna winder is Something-Else-Lemme-Tell-You. It's like the sound of something Outside trying it's best to get Inside, which is allus a threat to Our Warren.
So Missy lets loose with a'nudder thunderous ~*~*~*~WHUMP~*~*~*~ with her big ol' back paddle-foots, which is an alarum-signal in any Bunny Warren.
And I bounce up inna air again.
And rite about that time, I hear Maman stirring around in her and Dadda's bedroom.
And this is whut I hear:
Maman: There's something wrong in the Bun Room.
Maman: Missy's thumping.
Maman: Something's wrong in the Bun Room.
Maman: You stay awake while I go look.
Now Maman is very brave. She will go look at ebberyfing as long as Dadda is awake to hear her scream abouddit.
So I hear Maman tumble outta her high bed and pad-pad-pad around the corner of her room to come into the Bun Room.
And Maman flips on the light switch and ob course, ebberybun goes blind. Including her.
So she blunders around for a liddle and has a peer around the room. And we're all sittin' there, looking at her, looking at us.
And after a minit, she calls back to Dadda, "It's raining!"
And Dadda calls to her, "In the Bun Room?"
And Maman peers around some more and calls back, "No, I think it's mainly outside." (Bemember that these two are sposed to be 'tellygint hoomin adults...) "But it's hitting the window pretty hard. Like a firehose onna flat rock."
And then Maman does Roll Call (which goes like this):
Maman: Clover, honey?
Clover: Yes, Maman.
Maman: Maman's sweet widdle Hunny-bunny-boy?
Mouse: Shut up, woman.
Maman: Howsa Miss-Miss Bunnykins?
Missy: Wah! ~*~Thump~*~
Maman: Sweet little George?
me: Can I have a treat? Please? I'm awake! Over here!
And Maman heard me, ob course, and went and got the Treat Can full of raisins and gave ONE to each of us.
And then she shut off the light and pad-pad-paddled back toward her room.
Just a little later I heard Dadda say, "Bugger it." and then I heard him stumbled through the bedroom and into the bathroom. And then I heard Cocoa fall off the bed in Maman and Dadda's room, and go pad-pad-pad into the bathroom. And then Dadda yelled something about being "left alone to do certain things in peace without having a f-ing great audience of cats!" and Three cats came flying out of the bathroom, past the Bun Room and went galloping on down the hall toward Phil-the-Lad's room which is more or less vacant since he is in someplace called "MarryLand".
And then Dadda came outta the bathroom and plodded back into the bedroom and I heard him climb back into bed.
So we hadda'nudder one of whut Maman calls those nights where ebberybun was up "buggering about" as Dadda says, and I still don't know whut it is that's outside pounding onna winders to get in!
But it must not be Anything Bad, cos as Hunny says, if it was Anything Bad, Maman would hab gotten us out or saved us or screamed her head off and gotten Dadda to help, or something.
So while whatebber it was that was pounding on our winders went on pounding, I made uppa song to sing to myself while I was chewing on my raisin. I know I heard the werds before frum Maman reading to me, so the werds are Not Mine (they were thought up by some guy named "Robert Louis Stevenson" who lived a long time ago), but I made up the tune and this is how it goes:
The rain is raining all around;
It falls on grass and tree.
It falls on the umbrellas here,
And on the ships at sea.