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Tuesday, 11 May 2004
Day Fourteen / 4th Strand
Maman sed I hab falled down onna job as Top Bun cos I didn see "it" comin.

I dunno whut she hexpecks ob me, da stoopid womin.

Ebbery nite, I come outta my habbytat an wook innu ebberybunny else's habbytat an make shure dat dey are all-rite an if ebberyfing wooks hokay, den, dat's it, I figger it's all-rite an I kin go to bed.

I am nod to bwame for whut I can't see.

An I culdn't see dat Mouse was peein ober da side ob his pootie-box.

Mouse didn see it eidder. He's nod an "aim-bifore-peein" kind ob guy. He's more a "pee-an-den-wook-if-I-feel-wike-it" kinda guy.

An ennyway, nun ob us reelized dere wassa 'lektrikal plug down dere onna wall, an ebben if we did, I shure as heck know dat nun ob us knew da darn air condishywasher wuz plugged innu it.

An who knew dat bunny pee wuld cause a big fwash anna bang?

It's not wike we hab funder-storms inna Bun Room ebbery day. *sulk* An nod onwy dat, ebben if we DID hab funder-storms inna Bun Room, dey don happin cos ob Mouse peein, you know?

I jus don see how dis was my fault.

I don ebben see how id was enny ob Mouse's fault.

Whut I DO see issat Dadda shuldn't hab put Mouse's habbytat so cwose toda wall. An I also see dat Mouse's habbytat shuldn't hab been put onna Hope Chest, eidder. I mean, whut were dey hopin for? - dat he wuld miss da 'lektrik plug dat wus rite dere onna wall nextest to him when he peed? *geez*

Mouse has always had good pooty-box habits. He hassa corner pooty-box an he wikes it ober in dat corner, nearest da wall. Dat's kind obba natchural pwace fora bunny to habba pooty-box, near toa wall. Now just how he manages to pee ober da side wiffoud it showin, I don know. Nobunny seed it bifore wast nite, dat's fur shure. Not wike he wuz sprayin all ober da pink paint Maman is so fond ob or ennyfing. When Dadda moobed Mouse's habbytat, da paint onna wall wuz just fine.

Ob course, Mouse wuz a widdle shook up. I mean, it wuz hot inna Bun Room yestidday, so when Dadda comed home frum werk, he told Maman he wuz gonna turn onna Bun Room Air Condishywasher for us, an we fought, "Good". We've hadda air condishywasher now fora whole yeer an it helps keep our room nice ann cool inna Summertime. Bunnies need it to be cool where dey lib cos we wear fur coats no madder whut da season.

So Dadda turned onna Bun Room Wight an gotta Remote Contwol fingie, an pwessed da button to turn onna air condishywasher. Well, dere wassa sizzlin noise, an denna "Whop" sound, anna bwight fwash ob wight, an denna woud "BANG!".

Da wight went oud.

Well, Missy-Bun fumped an ran forit an skittered innu a heap atta back ob her habbytat. Luckie went straight up inna air an came down wif all four paws alreddy engaged, runnin inna cirkle. Beebe fumped and grunted an Dadda yelled, so I comed runnin toda frunt ob my habbytat an fell ober my wader bowl. Poet fell ober Hunny (who was nappin), twyin to ged away to her pooty-box, an Hunny rolled ober a couple ob times, twyin to find all four ob his feets an onwy rememberin where a couple obb'em was.

So dere was sum smoke, an Dadda stawted yellin for Maman, an Maman comes poundin uppa stairs, screamin, "Whut's happinin?" (Wike dis helps. She's a good wun inna 'mergency, she is.) An Dadda shuts offa switch onna wall, gwabs hold obba Hope Chest wif Mouse's habbytat onnit an flings it away frumma wall. Dis upsets Mouse, who suddenwy finds himself moobin sideways atta same time he's twyin to go forwards an he falls ober inna shower ob hay.

Inna meantime, Hunny's discobbered four-paw dribe an is careenin aroun his habbytat, wookin for Poet an fallin ober his tin cup.

An my feets are soaked cos my wadder bowl is uppyside down an I'm standin inna wadder twyin to see whut's goin on.

So, hokay, da smoke is driftin, just wun widdle curl obbit. Mouse jumps back on his paws, hassa lunge at Dadda an bites his hand. Dadda says a Bad Werd.

So Dadda unpwugs da air condishywasher, an Maman's goin aroun to alla habbytats, wookin at alla us. She sets Hunny up on his paws, an geds anudder fluffy towel for me, cos I'm all wet, an sorts Missy outta her tangle wif her toys an hay an stuff. Beebe an Clover are furthest away frum alla commoshun, an dere hokay. Poet is still inna pooty-box, hangin on wif her eyes cwosed, which is whut she does when she's skert. She figgers if she can't see it, den whutebber it is can't ged her. She's a nice bunny, jus not a Deep Finker.

So Dadda shows Maman da Plug frumma air condishywasher, an it's all bwack where it pwugs innu da wall. 'Parently, Mouse has been peein ober da side ob his pootybox all Winter an peein rite onna Plug. He didn pee onna wall or ennyfing else, jus onna Plug. All Winter. An now it's jus wun corroded mess ob pwastic, metal an bunny-pee, so dat when Dadda turned onna 'lektricity toda plug, it just hextploded.

An so Dadda turns to me an says, "Belinda, why didn't you tell me Mouse was pissing on this plug?"

An I'm wike, "Whut?"

An Maman says, "She's fallin down onna job, silly gurl."

An I'm wike, "Hay, waid a minit..."

An den dey WAFFED! At ME!

So I gabe dem da RBB. I mean, HONESTWY!!!

So now we gots no air condishywasher tidday, until Maman anna Lad can go to da Home Depot store an buy a noo plug. An it's gonna be eighty outside! Mite as well be Summer an us wif fur coats on!

An sumhow, I'm sposed to keep an eye on Mouse an where he pees, so dat I kin warn Dadda when dis is likely to happin again.

Yeah. Oh sure. Dat will happin. As if!

Stoopid hoomins!

Posted by Our Warren at 8:40 AM EDT
Updated: Tuesday, 11 May 2004 8:54 AM EDT
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