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Wednesday, 18 March 2009
George's 3rd Strand (2009), Day Number 18
Now Playing: Pollyticks

Well, today Maman said to me that if pollyticks was turning out to be nothing more than Two Mean Gurls writing onna bafroom walls aboudda'nudder gurl in sumplace called "Washingroom DeeCee", then we might as well move to a Desert Island.

Yeah.

And then she sed to me that she knew how-come those "pun-ditz", Laura Ingraham and Anne Coulter and the like were writing alla that stuff about Megan McCain - you know, criticising the way she looks, and Whut She Says and alla that other juvenile behaviour in which they're indulging inna national press and onna tellyvision anna radio - well, Maman finks it is because those Mean Gurls are actually being paid to write that stuff by sum Myffical Third Pawtee! And that they are doing it to make the Republican Political Party look even more stoopit than it can do on its own.

Yup. That's it. The "pun-ditz" (whutebber that is!) are not genuine Republicans! They don't "speak" for ennybunny, hextcept mebbe for Snausages Dawg treats. They are being paid to write rubbishy opinions by sum udder political party and are only pretending to be "Conservative Republicans"

Maman says the great fing aboudda Theory like hers issat it's totally impossible to prove. (Whut qualities constitute "Republican" as modified by genuine as opposed to counterfit? See?).

At least that's what Maman is hoping is Troo - onna'count obba Fakt she rilly doesn't want to believe that anyone would take their Furst Ammendmint Rights so lightly that they fink this stuff is amusing.

Maman has no problem discussing pollyticks with udder hoomins. She says that everybunny has a right to an opinon, and it's hokay to discuss fings - rationally and with respect and civility alla'round - but Civility dictates that everybunny discuss Opinions, not the Person Who Holds the Opinions.

She says: Personal attacks are the last salvo of the defeated.

And that makes sense onna'count obba Fakt minds are changed by the rational demonstration of logic, not by Doing The Wrong Thing.  

Maman says she was never rewarded for doing the Wrong Thing. She's been punished for doing the Right Thing, and she's been punished when she's done Nothing at all - but she's never been rewarded for doing the Wrong Thing.

Well...

  • Stealing 
  • Being Greedy
  • Being Envious

Are all Wrong Things in the measure The Warren, where bunnies werk Alla Us Togedder for the Good Obba Warren. We do not reward stuff that, inna long run, is gonna endanger Alla Us Togedder. That would be Plain Stoopit! But sumstimes, hoomins seem to reward whut bunnies would regard as "Neggytive Behaviours" or Wrong Thingsl Just this week inna Noospapers Maman and I have read and seen:

  • A woman whose husband admitted he stole millions of dollars of munny, loudly proclaiming her "right" to retain control of the fruits of his fraud.
  • A woman who gave birth to 14 children for whom she couldn't provide, admit she gave birth to them so they could assume the impossible task to "fill the void" within her, and that, although she doesn't hexpect ennybunny to materially provide for her children, she accepts gifts, sponsorships, handouts, tax-dollars, grants, donations, proposals, and... 
  • Two faux-pale-haired females who write/speak in the style of ill-mannered, socially maladjusted school-girls about a third female (who doesn't share their views). These two faux-pale-haired females, furthermore, have the audacity to presume to speak/write as members of a national political party most of whose members they have never met, and whose views they cannot possibly hope (think of the sheer logistics!) to know.   

And alla these hoomins are being rewarded for doing the Wrong Things!

  • The woman whose husband admits he indulged inna inelegant Confidence Swindle is there swanning about like royalty, flagrantly spending udder hoomins' munny (that's "Stealing")
  • The emotionally vampiristic Octomom is showing off "her" house wiffa pond inna middle obba bafroom floor, cribs, cosmetics, and everyfing else she finks she wants/deserves and axting for more (which is "Being Greedy")
  • While the two "pun-ditz"/"Conservative Reublicans" trash somebun who doesn't share their "views" because they say she isn't skinny enough or preddy enough to share their narrow views (which is "Being Envious") and they are taking sumbunny's munny to write/say such rubbish (which is probably sum form of "Stealing") and are Behaving Stoopitly, (which although it isn't listed as enny form of wrong-doing, probably should be!) alla'round the public media!

Do you know that inna Lagmorphic Society, each of these critters would be marginalised? Yeah, onna'count obba fakt Stealing, Being Greedy, and Being Envious are considered Not Behaving For The Good Obba Warren. And We Can't be Habbin' With That!

So ennyways...

Afta reading a liddle more, Maman tured away frumma 'puter and said to me,

"Do you know whut? I hate pollyticks. And I can't stand peroxide-breathing, pet-skinning, pseudo-intellectual cocktailistas who wrestle naked in the ethical gutter - no mind, no morals, no manners. However if these are the quality of people 'The People' are watching, then 'The People' are watching entirely the wrong people...and we really need to move to that Desert Island, George!"

And here I thought we were moovin' to Western Pennsylvania, or mebbe Uppystate Noo Yawk...

------------------------------------ By George


Posted by Our Warren at 2:28 PM EDT
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