Now Playing: Ice-storm Normal
Maman said that we're Inna Ice Storm.
It began as a Snow Storm, but fings changed over night and Now there is the Tail End of an Ice Storm going on, and the Beginnings of a Flood Warning. The Stone Warren in Hunny's Our Warren Memorial Rose & Herb Gardin are all shiny with a glaze of ice, the Back Garden is Wun Grey Sheet and Maman is afriad to let Da Dawg go Out On Patrol in case he Slips and Falls.
So this is 'Fishully Messed Up.
Maman also said there will be No Morning Hay onna'count obba Fakt the Hay Locker is Sealed Up Tight.
So that's a Bummer.
And Mr Mouse said he isn't Shure, but he's Pretty Shure that he can hear Wadder Dripping outside the Door-To-The-ScreePorch that is Nextest to His Habbytat, which prob'ly means that the ScreenPorch, where it hooks on to the Rest Obba Houz, is either Parting Company Wiffa Rest Obba Houz or else it hassa Leak In Its Roof.
Eidder Way, Maman says, there is Nothing She Can Do About It Now, 'cept wait for the Flood Watch to End, the Precippytashun to Stop, and then Call Sumbun to Take A Look At It and Tell her How Much It Will Cost to Fix Whut's Wrong. She said it's Anudder Wun of Those Fings that's all set to Drive Her Nutz, but hasn't Happined Yet. She calls it An InSippyAnt DisAssTer (insect sucked through a beverage straw + lady that backed innu an airplane propeller. Please try to keep up.).
So Maman said to Us (after she'd 'Nnoyed Mr Mouse by moving him all around to make "Wun-hunnert p'sent sure" that there was no wadder threatening to come in or around on him or ennyfing),
"To hell with it."
And got out milk for her Big Cuppa Coffee and then stumbled Uppystairs on her Onliest, leaving a trail of coffee drops that Kept Da Dawg Amused, and Not Much Else. I don't fink she slept very well lastest night onna count obba Fakt I kept on hearing her Commit Serial Sneezing.
So that's aNudder Bummer.
So Dadda just Waked Up and Tried to Let Da Dawg Out On Patrol. Da Dawg stood atta Back Door, stuck his nose out and sniffed for a Minit, then turned to Dadda and said,
"No Fanks. No Job, No Go. You go, I go, but Udderwise, forgedabouddit."
Then he turned around and came by Missy and Me and said, "As Dadda says, 'Bugger that for a game ob soldiers!' onna'count obba Fakt no self-respecktin' Dawg is gonna go out in that! Furst ob all, it's Pouring Down Freezin' Rain, Seckont ob all the Steps are All Ice, then it's Snow, then more Ice and now the Lake is forming atta Bottom Obba Yard. If Dadda's not comin' out, there is No Way I'm going out! No Job, No Go. That's my motto. Geez!"
And he went off to do his Favourite Fing, which is to Herd Catz, onna'count obba Fakt Maman left the Door Atta Top Obba Stairs open and Beep had come downnastairs assa Volunteer.
And Maman came Downnastairs to give Alla Us Togedder Baby Organic Carrots.
And she said, "That ought to shut you up."
Which is Preddy Ironic onna'count obba Fakt that none of Us has said Ennyfing yet.
And she went off to complain to Dadda that Ellyphants have Ice Skated on Razor Blades down her throat. She also said she didn't feel like talking and then did a Lot of It, mostly telling him what We Could Already Hear, which was that Don-Nextest-Door was shovelling out his DribeWay, and making room for alla rain wadder to flow out *that way*. And Maman said that This would prob'ly be a Golden Opportunity for Dadda to use his HydroWhutSit Engineering Certification-fing to do sum Hydro-Engineering Around Heer.
Dadda said his Additional Certification was in HyDrawLick Engineering and that it wasn't quite the Same Fing.
And Maman gave him that blank stare that she gives to him when Stupid Issa'Vantage and said, "But you Are An Engineer. Engineers Can Fix Ennyfing. And we prob'ly *should* Fix the Rain before the Ice Storm does it for us."
Maman says she has Total Faith in Dadda's Ability to Fix Ennyfing. Onna'count obba Fakt that he issa Engineer.
Anna Cokie Cat cruised by and said to the Dawg, "Sucks to be you, pal. I'm heading Uppystairs for my Indoor Pootie Box and morning nap."
And Mr Mouse said, "Don't look at me. I always use my pootie-box."
And Dusty and Missy were both Occupying their Respective High Grounds and giving Da Dawg a sort of Copy of Maman's Stupid Issa'Vantage Stare.
So the Dawg was standing beside the Back Door with his paws Crossed, and looking at Dadda axting, "Gotta Job?" in the hopeful, anxious Collie-way.
And Dadda said to the Dawg, "Lookit, son, you go Count Your Squirrels. I'll go Engineer Sum Steel. Meet you back heer in three minits."
And he Opined the Back Door anna Dawg shot out of it, toenails all hextended for track-shun inna weather. So the Morning Patrol is Unner Way, Dadda is Engineering and Maman and Alla Us Togedder are doing Our Normal inna Ice Storm.
----------------------------------- By George!