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Thursday, 7 February 2008
George's 2008 Second Strand: Day Number 7
Now Playing: Hey!

Hey! Guess whut Judge Rudy Esquhare told me? Her mawmie, Our Auntie Michelle is inna Newsday Noospaper Today! You can read the article heer.

Yeah!

Our Auntie Michelle issa Suffolk County Assistant District Attorney and she issa Wun Person alla Animals can turn to to Be A Voice for the Voiceless! She works with the Animal Cops, getting the mean animal abusers they arrest. She convicts and punishs the abusers for alla bad Fings they do to animals.

Not a lotta lawyers do this - but sum do, and the Wuns That Do, need to be Recognised!

And that's anudder Fing that I need to tell you! Did you see that it was Smokey's mawmie, Our Auntie PatriciaNa, mawmie to Rainbow Tulip and Our Rainbow Empress Ivy, who made Little Rainbow Ashy, Dandelion King's Dandelion Throne?

Yeah!

I mean, we're talking Real Designer Fashions for Fine Living As An Urban Rabbit! I *rilly* dunno why there are not more HouzRabbit Monarchs that are not demanding similar thrones for their own Kingdoms!

With Bunnies, Royalty is more about Perception than bloodline. It's sumfing you either have or your don't, but not like you can just Get It Anywheres or Find It Lying Around (like the Isle of Man). It's more like Who You Know You Are, rather than Who Your Mawmie (or Dadda) Was. We trace our heritage by our Warrens, not our Parents. So the Ruling Biznizz is pretty Big so far as Alla Us are concerned. We're all Legends in Our Own Spheres, which is preddy much hextends about Wun Foot Alla'round Us In Enny Direckshun.

So we prob'ly All Need Thrones.

Anna Design Werked Out by Auntie Patricia for Rainbow Ashy seems just about Perfeckt In All Respekts.

It is Sumfing to Aspire to, ennyways. Maman says the Pursuit of Ellygance issa Legitimate Hextercise. So when I see Ellygance, it will be hokay for me to chase afta her.

But for now, I gotta deal with Missy, onna'count obba Fakt that she's here and I'm preddy much obba Wun Bun-gurl Guy.

But you know, this getting - and eating - of treats is *rilly* getting to me, lemme tell you. Maman puts four Baby Organic Carrots innu Our Habbytat and she allus says the same fing:

"Share."

Uh huh. Yeah. Like that's *rilly* gonna happin!

Onna'count obba Fakt that as soon as those four Baby Organic Carrots come innu Our Habbytat, MissyBun comes bustling frum where-ebber she happins to be and promptly CUBBERS at least TWO of them with her Gen'rus Pro'porshunate Bum and starts to eat wunna the wuns that's left!

And I'm left sitting there considering the TWO Baby Organic Carrots that she is not covering up with her Gen'rus Pro'porshuns, and I'm like,

"HEY!"

And Missy looks up at me with her mouth pouched full of Carrot and she's like, "Whut?"

And I'm like, "I was gonna eat that!"

And she's like, "Lookit, I'm sharin'! I left you wun!"

And I'm like, "But there were FOUR ob'em."

And Missy's all innocent-like, and she axts me, "Where?" and then continues eating like there's nothing funny going on.

So I start in on the wun Baby Organic Carrot what's sitting there, onna'count obba Fakt if I don't, that wun is gonna start going the same way as the Furst Wun.

So I say to Missy between bites of Carrot, "I know you're sitting on TWO carrots."

And Missy says, "Not that I can feel." and afta she takes the last bite of her carrot she looks around at either side of her bum and then looks at me and adds, "Nope. I don't see enny more Baby Organic Carrots. Howa'bout I hab sum obba yours?"

And I'm like, "NO!" and start pulling my carrot outta her way, when she just reaches over and grabs a'hold of it, right as it's in my mouth!

So I'm holding on tight, lemme tell you! And I'm at her through my teeth, "Ger'offa my carrot!"

And Missy's holding on to the udder end of the Baby Organic Carrot just as tightly and talking through her teeth, too, and she says, "Maman said to share!"

And I'm like, "Lookit, I just shared more than my part with you!"

And she gives a big, old yank onna Baby Organic Carrot and since she's bigger than I am, I go stumbling forwards, still hanging on to the carrot.

And just about then, Maman goes by again and she reaches innu the Habbytat and she's like,

"MissyBun Harper!"

And Missy isn't letting go of her end of the carrot, even with Maman right there!

And then Maman reaches unner'neaf of Missy's butt, and Missy's like, "Whoa!" but she's *still* not letting go obba carrot!

And it's MY Baby Organic Carrot!

So I'm there onna udder end obba carrot and I'm yelling, "Maman!"

And Maman comes up with the udder two Baby Organic Carrots that Missy has been sitting on, and covering up, hiding, with her Gen'rus Pro'porshuns!

And Maman says, "Missy! I told you to share with George! How menny times do I have to tell the two of you?"

And then she PUSHES ME OFFA THE END OF MY CARROT!

YEAH!

Can you believe it?

Maman pushes me offa the end of MY BABY ORGANIC CARROT and puts the udder two down in frunt of me. And she says, "Here you go, George. If Missy's going to steal yours, then you can have these."

And so there I am, looking at these two Baby Organic Carrots that have been unner'neaf of Missy's Bum of Gen'rus Pro'porshuns (!!), and then I look at Maman and then at Missy - WHO IS EATING MY CARROT!

And I say to Maman, "That's NOT the point."

And Maman is like, "Whutsamatta, George? Don't you want the carrots?"

And I'm like, "That's not the point!"

And Maman is like, "Don't you feel good, George?"

And I'm like, "I feel fine. That's-not-the-point..."

And then Maman starts to feel my ears and she says, "Your ears feel normal. You're not getting sick, are you?" and she calls Dadda: "Brian! George isn't eating his carrots! Maybe he doesn't feel good?"

And I'm looking at her and looking at Missy chewing on MY CARROT and I'm like,

"Hey! Wady! You don't unner'stand!"

But now Maman's onna train-that-don't-stop-till-it-hits-the-station.

And she calls Dadda again, "Brian? George isn't eating his carrots..."

And out comes Dadda. And he looks at me and I look at him and then at Missy eating the LAST BITE OB MY CARROT!

And Dadda looks at Maman and says, "I don't think there's anything wrong with George, except Missy's eating his carrot, dear."

And then he looks over at me again and says, "And let me tell you, son," he says, "I'd be mightily put out with the Auld Bug-a-Lugs, too!"

----------------------------------------------------- By George.! 


Posted by Our Warren at 11:03 AM EST
Updated: Thursday, 7 February 2008 2:41 PM EST
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