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Thursday, 15 March 2007
George's Third Strand (2007); Day Number 15
Now Playing: Smells, Stinks anna Ride-Inna-Car...
Topic: Lagomorphin Enterprises

Well, Cokie-da-Fat-Cat is unnerneaf obba footon in Maman's Study and he won't come out.

I told him, "Wookit, Cat. Dis is No Big Deal"

And he sed, "I hab suffered an Indiggity,"

And I'm wike, "So far as I know, Cat, you hab just bin toda Spa. So whut?"

And Cokie is wike, "I hab bin Humillyated."

And I'm wike, "Wookit, Dadda put you inna carrier yestidday morning...and you wint fora Ride Inna Car. So did Da Dawg. So whut? "

Anna Cokie-Cat poked his hed up and sed, "You don't unnerstand, George BunnyRabbit! You are a BunnyRabbit! Stuff wike dis doesn't happin to You!"

And I'm wike, "You are Rite: BunnyRabbits nebber hab to go toda Spa onna'count obba Fakt dat we do not get to smell wike Old Privy Carpets, as Maman says. She says dat if you did not smell wike an Old Privy carpet (whutebber *dat* is!) den you wuld not hab to go toda Spa. You only hab to go onna'count obba Fakt dat you smell."

Anna Cokie-Cat glared at me and sed, "So whutta'boudda'Dawg? Huh? Why does da Dawg hab to go wif me?"

And I sed, "Well, you herd Maman: Da Dawg has Mucky Paws. If he didn't hab Mucky Paws and hab them all ober her clean floor inna Kitchen, he wuldn't hab to go toda Spa, eidder. So dere you are. Plus, da Dawg was smellin', too. Dadda sed. Mucky Paws and Smellin'."

Anna Cat sed frum unnerneaf obba footon, "Wookit BunnyRabbit, I lib to smell. And now I hab bin Humillyated. I don't smell rite. I gots Spa Smell."

And I sed, "No. You stink. You stink wike Spa. Wike artyfishul flowers and perfoom and stuff, but you def'nitly don't smell - you Stink."

"I am s'sposed to Stink - wike Cat." Sed Cokie, in offended terms. "Dat's my Job!"

And just den, in comes Beep-da-Udder-Cat, hotly pursuded byda Dawg. He finks he's doing his Job ob Herding Catz, only Beep just finks he's being his ushual Pain Inna Butt. It's a Communykayshuns Problem they habbin't werked out for a coupla years.

And Beep jumps up on toda footon and she's wike, "I smell wike Cat and I don't hab to go toda Spa."

Anna Dawg is wike, "I went toda Spa and got Collie-Slick!" and starts waggin' his tail back and forf.

Anna Cokie-Cat sticks outta paw and takes a swipe atta Dawg-tail and says, "Goody fur you." and pulls back his claws.

And I'm wike, "Whuttsamatta? Whutdaheck is 'collie-slick'?"

Anna Dawg says, "I dunno. Maman says dat it goes on show collies to make dere fur shiney and slippery, so I guess it issa good fing. But it doesn't 'Half Pong' Dadda sed, so I guess dat's good, too, onna'count obba Fakt dat no udder Dawgs smell wike Me! And I bin All Ober da Back Gardin, spreading My Noo Smell ob Me!"

Anna Cokie-Cat grumbles again, "Well, goody fur you."

And Beep says, "I don't hab to go toda Spa, and I still smell wike Me."

So I'm wike, "Why don't you hab to go?"

And Beep is wike, "Onna'count obba Fakt dat Maman says I grow extry 'Arms' and 'Wegs' whin I am dere, which ends up costing her and Dadda more munny. So I don't go."

"Ebben though you stink?" I axt.

And Beep sed, "Yup. But I don't stink; I only smell ob Cat. You see, rite now Cokie stinks. Ob Spa, mostly. I smell, but dif'frunt."

"And you don't ged Mucky Paws?" I axt.

And Beep sed, "Dat's only for Dawgs.I mainly just smell."

And Cokie, still unnerneaf obba footon yeowls, "It's not fair! I hab suffered an Indiggity! I Stink ob Spa!!"

Anna Dawg, still watching Beep, who was sitting onna footon, says, "Just do whut I do - spread your stink around."

And Cokie wailed, "But it's not My Stink! It's Spa Stink!"

Anna Dawg is wike, "Wookit, Cat, it's da Stink Dat You Hab."

And I'm wike, "I'm a BunnyRabbit, and I keep my stink safe in my litter pan and chin it heer on alla stuff I can reach heer inna Study."

Anna Cat is wike, "But you don't unnerstand, they have gone and Taked Away My Stink!"

And I'm wike, "So whut are you gonna do aboud'dit?"

And Cokie-da-Fat-Cat says, "I'm gonna stay unnerneaf obba footon until My Stink comes back."

Anna Dawg hassa wook unnerneaf obba footon and he says, "Dat culd take awhile."

And Beep says, "And I will keep walkin' around, onna'count obba Fakt dat I still gots My Smell."

Anna Dawg says, "Well, I'm gonna just spread My Collie-Slick Spa Stink all ober my Gardin."

And I'm wike, "Waidaminit, Maman is onna tellyphone again. She's talkin' aboudda 'Catz' anna 'Dawg' and you are 'goin' sumwhere again."

And Cokie wooks up. "We alreddy bin."

And I'm turning my ears, and I'm wike, "Does 'Saturday' sound familiar?"

Anna Dawg is wike, "No."

And den Maman comes innu da Study frum Dadda's office and she wooks atta Dawg and she says, all bright-wike, "You're going to see Doctor PeterBatts, Marc. Do you want to habba Ride Inna Car?"

Anna Cat yells, "No! We allreddy BIN on ONE Ride Inna Car and dat went toda SPA! Dat car only goes to WUN UDDER place and I'm not goin' dere!"

And right away da Dawg starts to wag his tail and bounce up-and-down and starts his singin' - "Ride Inna Car! Ride Inna Car! I'm gonna go fora Ride Inna Car!"

And Cokie pulls himself furder in unnerneaf obba footon and tucks his paws up unnerneaf ob himself and tries to ged small, and if you listen really close you kin hear him purrin' nervously, "Oooooooh nooooooo! Noooooo Ride-Inna-Car! Not for dis kitty-cat! I'm not goin' for ENNY more Rides Inna Car!"

And then Maman piks me up and wooks at me nose-to-nose and says, "And Doctor Sharin wants to see you, too, little mister! How about a Ride Inna Car for you and Missy?"

And I'm wike, "Waidaminit. Hold on!" And my ears go up straight. And I call down to MissyBun who is browsing amongst da Buks in Dadda's office "Are you lebbin' enny stink?"

And Missy is wike, "No more den usual."

And I'm wike, "Well, cut it out! And ged in sumplace small! Maman wants us to go fora Ride Inna Car!"

And Missy is wike, "Ride Inna Car? You gottabekiddin me!"

So we're worried heer. Dere is entirely too much ob dis 'Ride Inna Car' fing going around...

-----------------By George.

..


Posted by Our Warren at 11:45 AM EDT
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