Now Playing: A Box of Coloured Chalks
Topic: Lagomorphin Enterprises
So heer I am on dis berry mild Spring morning, doing whut I allus do, which is grooming MissyBun onna'count obba Fakt dat she is my Beautiful Bunny-Gurl ob Gen'rus P'porshuns.
And Maman sorta staggers innu da Bun Room looking for her high-powered migraine meddysin inna refriggyator, onna'count obba Fakt dat she has woken up wiffa Rilly Bad Migrain for No Reason inna Werld, and Dadda is wif her onna'count obba Fakt dat she Mite Tumble Ober, cos she issn't walking too well becos her Hed hurts.
And Maman turns around frumma 'frigerator and she is wike, "Oh , how cute! George found the chalk mark!"
And Dadda says, "Yes, you know sumday we will hab to buy him a Box ob Coloured Chalks."
And they giggled. They allus say this onna'count obba Fakt dat MissyBun issa Beautiful Bunny-Gurl ob Gen'rus P'porshuns and her back is mostly all-white so they fink I'm gonna loose my way while I am grooming her.
Which is preddy stoopit frum my point ob view onna'count obba Fakt dat I lub my Bunwife, and whin you lub sumbun you are keeping your eyes mostly on dem and not on you. Which is how you know you lub dem: look at where you're lookin' most obba time - You shuld be wooking at dem and dey are wookin' back at you!
Ob course dere are Times whin I wish Missy wasn't wookin' at me so close. Most ob these times involve Salad. Like whin Maman or Dadda puts da Salad innu our habbytats and da Salads are too close togedder and Missy wooks up frum eating alla her Parsley while I mite still hab sum Parlsey and she says,
And I'm wike, habbin' to grab dat last sprig ob Parlsey inna-hurry before she reaches ober to grab it, or I hab to sit on dat last Baby Organic Carrot so she doesn't see dat I hab wun while I'm mugging for a pet.
Missy is not above sneaking dat wast Baby Organic Carrot out frum unnerneaf my butt if she has alreddy eaten alla hers. Dat bunnygurl lubs her Baby Organic Carrots, lemme tell you!
But dat is also part ob lub: Knowing when you hab to sit on sumfing onna'count obba Udder Wun.
Maman was just beminding Phil-da-Lad ob whin he was small and Sistah Beffy was small and Maman usta hab to put dere names on boxes ob Cereal so each wun had wun and nobun got more cereal den ennybunny else.
Maman sed dat prevented Fings Frum Happinen, wike sumbun pouring outta bowl ob RaisinBran dat was all Bran and No Raisins, or pouring out a bowl ob Lucky Charms wif Marshmallows dat was all Lucky Charms and No Marshmallows.
So I gotta be on my toes whin Salad arrives.
It's not so bad for Mr Mouse or for Beebe, who lib in dere own habbytats... although Beebe says he hasta keep on his toes around Stuffie, but being a Small Bunny it's sumtimes almost Impossible for him to ged alla dat Salad down at One Time, even though he's eating as fast as he can.
Luckily, Stuffie doesn't seem to eat much, or steal Baby Organic Carrots out frum unnerneaf ob him - which is kinda bedder den whin he was libbin' wif Ms Clover, who usta just flip him innu da air and snatch da Baby Orgainc Carrot if she hadda mind to, onna'count obba Fakt dat she was anudder Big Beautiful Bunny-Gurl ob Gen'rus P'porshuns.
But onna'udder-side obba coin, Clover usta also be dere da sekond Beebe sneezed or ennyfing and allus kept her eyes mainly on Beebe and not on herself - which is how she would see he had enny Baby Organic Carrots, ennyways. Dis was onna'count obba Fakt dat she lubbed him so much dat she was allus watchin' ober him so dat he stayed Perfektly Groomed, which Stuffie doesn't seem to do onna'count obba Fakt dat she issa Stuffie and not da same assa bunny although she wooks wike wun.
Beebe has tried peeing on her (descreetly) so dat she smells right, just wike da rest ob Our Warren (even da Dawg), but she still is not acting hextactly right - although she still preddy much stands ober Salad which makes Beebe hab to eat as much assa Small BunnyRabbit can hold at Wun Sitting
Which is why he was yellin' at Maman last nite, "YO! Gedouttaheer so I can eat, will ya?"
And dat is while Maman was standing there saying to Daddy, "Oh look at Beebe! Isn't he adorable? Maman's poor widdle sweetie..."
And Beebe's wike, "YO! Wady! GeddaheckOUT!"
And Maman's still hanging around, talkin' to Dadda and sayiing how "cute" we are... which *shuld* hab translated innu a coupla more Baby Organic Carrots for each bunny, but sumfing got lost in translation and it didn't.
In Fakt, da only fing New dat happined Yestidday was dat Mouse gotta new Cardboard fing to beat up on.
Yeah! And Guess Whut else?
You know Auntie Irene who comes in heer and talks to Mouse? Da friend ob Maman's who hassa Cat and who also feeds Catz she doesn't ebben know? And she issa 'fraid obba bunnies onna'count obba Fakt she finks we are "dellycat" (whutebber *dat* means!).
And she says Mr Mouse is her favourite onna'count obba Fakt dat he glares at her and grunts and honks at her. Dis is beacuse she has nebber seed a Vocal Rabbit, and Mr Mouse issa berry Vocal Houz Rabbit.
Well, she comed in heer innu da Bun Room a coupla days ago and waved sum scraps ob paper in frunt ob Mouse and sed, "Are you feeling lucky, Mr Mouse?"
And Mouse was wike, "I'm feeling wike you're invading my property. Ged out." and got all resentful onna'count obba Fakt dat she didn't bring him a raisin or carrot or ennyfing. And she smelled wike Catz!
Auntie Irene went on, waving da scraps ob paper and axting Mouse if he felt lucky.
So Mouse is dere wike, "Lookit, wady..." and honked, just to show her dat he didn't feel like being bothered just then if she didn't hab ennyfing she wanted to gib him.
And Auntie Irene is going, "Pick a ticket, Mouse. Come on, are you going to pick a lucky ticket for me?"
And finally, Mouse is wike, "Yeah, I'll 'pick' a ticket for you.. TAKE THAT!"
And he lunged at her and took a nice chunk outta one obba scraps ob paper.
And den she wike, giggled at him, and she goes, "Are you shure? Issat da wun you want?"
And Mouse is wike, "I'm shure I want you outta my face wif dose tickets!" and he honked again.
So, finally, Auntie Irene taked da hint and went off wiffa scraps ob paper she called "tickets".
Well, yestidday, she calls up Maman and tells her, "Guess whut?"
And Maman is wike, "Whut?"
And Auntie Irene says, "Your rabbit won da Pick Three."
And Maman is wike, "Whutdaheck issat?"
And Auntie Irene goes, "Mouse's number came out. He's a lucky bunny. He won the Daily Number. He's knee-deep in carrots."
And Maman is wike, "Dat's not deep - he's a short rabbit."
And Auntie Irene is wike, "Then he's butt-deep in carrots."
And Maman says, "Dat's still not berry deep. He's a Netherlands Dwarf Rabbit."
And Auntie Irene says, "I don't gibba hoot Whut Kind Ob Bunny he is! He's a Lucky Rabbit! Serriusly, he won the Pick Three. He rilly did. I'll be over later and we'll see how lucky he rilly is - I'm gonna play anudder game and let him pick anudder number."
And Maman sed, "Just bemember, Mouse issa Anglican Bunny. I don't think and I don't fink he's s'sposed to be playing da lottery."
And Auntie Irene sed, "Dat's hokay. Jeremiah Winslow, my cat, issa Catholic cat so he's at least hexpected to play Bingo. So we'll let Mouse mention the number and then Jeremiah can buy the ticket and they can split the proceeds..."
And Maman finks fora minute and den she says, "But only if they both put 10% of their winnings innu da Alms basin."
And dat was hokay wif Auntie Irene.
So dat was preddy much dat...
And Maman sed it's dat you end up keeping your eyes on whut you lub, even if it's only inna gently funny way, dat where you look is Important.
She sed to us, "Modeste Mussorgsky who wrote beautiful musiks allus sed, 'Tell me whom you lub and I'll tell you who you are.' and dat we allus look most oftin atta fing or person we lub most.
And if we are wooking at ourselves alla time, den we don't hab time to wook at anudderbunny...
And den I guess we would need those boxes ob coloured chalks to figger out where we left off grooming and where to begin nextest...
-------------------------- By George. .